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Why am I dreaming about getting back together with my ex? (9 possible reasons)

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Dreaming about an ex is natural; especially if the breakup wasn’t too long ago.

Dreams can be a complicated representation of feelings, thoughts, and emotions blended together into an abstract concoction.

Just because you dreamt about getting back together with your ex doesn’t necessarily mean that deep down you want to get back with them.

In reality, those dreams could symbolize something a little more complex.

Here are some of the most common reasons why you’re dreaming about your former lover:

1.  Lingering Feelings for Your Ex

This is perhaps the most obvious and straightforward reason.

Breakups can be hard and your feelings aren’t a switch that can be turned off at a moment’s notice.

Even if you want to put on a brave face and act like it doesn’t bother you, you can’t always hide from your true feelings.

If you have unresolved and lingering feelings for your ex, it is more than possible that you may dream about getting back together with them.

Rather than hiding from your feelings, take an introspective look at your feelings instead, and you will be able to ascertain whether you still want to get back together with them.

The answer may even surprise you.

You can decide on how to choose to act on those lingering feelings and the fact that you’re not over them after that.

2) Haven’t Come to Terms With the Breakup Yet

Mourning the loss of any relationship is an important step to getting to a healthier place in life. It is easy to avoid dealing with our feelings.

However, just because you choose to ignore your feelings doesn’t mean they will fade away.

There are times when someone is simply out of touch with their emotional process and is still grieving over an ex, and this manifests itself in their dreams.

This symbolizes that it’s high time for you to search into the depths of your soul and reflect on the relationship.

It’s critical to consider what didn’t work for both parties, why the relationship ended, and whether or not it’s something you truly desire.

While it’s natural to have dreams about getting back together with your ex when you’re still processing the breakup, it may be your brain’s way of telling you that it’s time to accept that both of you are in separate ways now instead of living in denial.

Or perhaps this is your brain’s way of telling you that you really want your ex back.

So the question is:

How can you get your ex back?

In this situation, there’s only one thing to do – re-spark their romantic interest in you.

I learned about this from Brad Browning, who has helped thousands of men and women get their exes back. He goes by the moniker of “the relationship geek”, for good reason.

In this free video, he’ll show you exactly what you can do to make your ex want you again.

No matter what your situation is — or how badly you’ve messed up since the two of you broke up — he’ll give you a number of useful tips that you can apply immediately.

Here’s a link to his free video again. If you really want your ex back, this video will help you do this.

3) Potential Causes for Concern in Your Present Relationship

Even if you’re in love with your new partner, there are bound to be some aspects of the relationship that you wish were different.

Perhaps your ex did something that you wish your present spouse did, either emotionally or sexually.

In this situation, the dream may be present to assist you to identify an unmet need so you can discuss it with your existing spouse.

It’s difficult to get over an old relationship because you’re afraid of being hurt in the same way again; especially if your split was very traumatic.

The dream could even be your method of recognizing that a new relationship is following in your footsteps.

This means that you need to make proactive changes to ensure you don’t repeat past mistakes.

It could also be a sign that you haven’t got complete emotional closure.

4) Sign of PTSD if It Was a Toxic Relationship

Our subconscious mind is always trying to resolve unresolved issues and trauma.

Dreams give us insight into issues we haven’t fully handled in the past.

For example, if you had a nasty breakup with your ex and the relationship was toxic to you, you’re likely to have trust issues in future relationships.

You might even fantasize about reuniting with them as a method to work over your trust difficulties. In other words, your ex could be acting as a stand-in for you as you work through the PTSD from previous relationships.

5) You Could Be Feeling Lonely

It’s possible that you’re lonely, and your desire to get back together with them is manifesting itself in your dreams.

These yearnings could be for more intimacy, affection, or love in your life.

Loneliness can take a toll on your mental health, especially if you aren’t ready to move on after a breakup.

If you feel insecure and unstable in your current relationship, you may be dreaming of your ex in order to feel secure.

In a previous relationship, your ex could convey the feeling of not being respected.

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You could be expressing your want to be vulnerable with someone and to be loved unconditionally.

6) It Could Be Symbolic of a Time or Aspect of Your Life That You Desire

Having frequent dreams about getting back with your ex could mean that you dearly miss something from your time spent with them.

You may not even be missing the actual person; it may be the moments you shared with them, the things you did together, the place you lived, a place you frequented at the time, or the quality of life from that time.

You may begin to see similarities between your present relationship and your ex-partner’s characteristics.

Another reason for dreaming about your ex is missing their best qualities.

These qualities could be the ones that drew you towards them and can leave you longing for them a lot.

This feeling can make you feel like they didn’t give you that aspect of their life and you long for that quality in your life.

Your ex probably personifies a quality you wish to have in your life, possibly to bring you more spice or adventure.

7) You’re Looking for Closure or Acceptance

You may be dreaming about getting back with your ex because you’re not able to make peace with the way the relationship fell apart.

Breakups rarely ever go as planned, regardless of whether you wanted out or not.

Perhaps you wished you had said something different.

Perhaps you wish you had behaved differently. Perhaps anything he or she said has been constantly playing in your mind.

All these unanswered questions can leave you wanting closure.

The longer you delay getting this closure, the more you may fantasize about getting back with your ex.

You don’t have to talk to an ex to receive what you need to feel better about a breakup.

A dream can be a means of us attempting to reach that conclusion on our own.

You may also dream about getting back with your ex if your self-esteem has taken a toll and are looking for acceptance.

8) If It Was About Saving Them Then There May Be Lessons to Be Learned

It’s likely that dreams about reuniting with your ex were fantastic adventures in which you even saved them from danger.

This is a classic sign that your subconscious is attempting to tell you that the relationship made you a stronger person and that you can learn from it.

You may still be thinking about these lessons learned from your past relationship.

Your ex could have helped you learn what’s acceptable to you. Like if your ex was deceitful, you’re setting the bar that you will no longer stand for or tolerate lying.

Dreaming about someone you used to love can sometimes be a means of helping you apply the lessons you learned in your past relationship to your new one; they may even help you better yourself so that you can have better relationships in the future.

But if you really want to get back together with your ex, then you’ll need a plan of how you’ll make it happen.

Rather than leaving it up to fate to decide, why not take things into your own hands and find a way to get through to your ex?

I mentioned Brad Browning earlier – he’s an expert in relationships and reconciliation.

His practical tips have helped thousands of men and women not only reconnect with their exes but to rebuild the love and commitment they once shared.

If you’d like to do the same, check out his excellent free video here.

9) It Could Indicate a Need to Introspect About Your Own Self

Dreaming about getting back with your ex could be an indicator that you need to take a step back from your current life and introspect into your own self.

You may begin to notice characteristics in yourself that make you miserable.

Dreaming about your ex symbolizes the qualities you’d like to improve.

You can be projecting this onto your ex if you’re not ready to take responsibility for your behavior and the changes you need to make.

It could also be a representation of a part of you that you may have lost when you were with them, signaling that it’s time to reclaim that part of yourself.

It could also indicate that you’re ignoring yourself in some ways. It’s never a bad idea to do some self-reflection on your behavior and personality traits.

It could help you ascertain whether you need to make any huge changes to your life.

Dreams could simply be your mind’s way of informing you that you’re suppressing a different half of yourself and that you need to reconnect with your true self.

This dream is telling you that you should focus on strengthening your relationship with yourself rather than diverting your attention to external relationships at this time.

But if you’ve decided that this dream means that you really do want your ex back, and you want to make it happen, then you’re going to need a bit of help.

And the best person to turn to is Brad Browning.

No matter how ugly the breakup was, how hurtful the arguments were, he’s developed a couple of unique techniques to not only get your ex back but to keep them for good.

So, if you’re tired of missing your ex and want to start afresh with them, I’d highly recommend checking out his incredible advice.

Here’s the link to his free video once again.

Are you ready to commit and change your life?

When you’re experiencing issues in life, your body often enters a “fight-or-fight” response, causing your breathing to speed up. This puts you in a state of hypervigilance and makes it difficult to confront your challenges head-on.

Many people have turned to breathwork to reverse this response and relax their bodies.

The most effective type of breathwork we’ve come across is shamanic breathwork because of its focus on connecting with the inner self. This can result in profound realizations and experiences that help you to confront whatever issue you’re facing.

If you want to try a shamanic breathwork exercise, we recommend the Ybytu masterclass by Rudá Iandê.

In this free masterclass, Rudá explains the background to shamanic breathwork and takes you through a powerful exercise to instantly bring calmness and ease into your life. We can’t recommend it highly enough.

Learn more about the Ybytu shamanic breathwork masterclass here.

Written by Lachlan Brown

I’m Lachlan Brown, the editor of Ideapod and founder of Hack Spirit. I love writing practical articles that help others live a mindful and better life. I have a graduate degree in Psychology and I’ve spent the last 6 years reading and studying all I can about human psychology and practical ways to hack our mindsets. If you to want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Twitter or Facebook.

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