If someone displays these 10 behaviors, they’re an attention-seeker

If you’re anything like me, you’ve probably encountered people who just can’t seem to resist the allure of the spotlight, those who seem to crave attention in almost every situation. 

I can’t help but find myself curious about what drives this behavior and how to recognize it when I see it. 

Want to know how to spot an attention-seeker? You’re in luck! 

In this article, we’ll explore the top ten behaviors that can indicate someone is an attention-seeker. Let’s dive in!

1) They’re constantly seeking validation

As someone who has struggled with self-esteem issues in the past, I can empathize with those who look for validation from others. However, attention-seekers tend to take it to another level. 

You’ll often find them fishing for compliments or constantly comparing themselves to others. And they constantly seek reassurance from friends, family, or even strangers, asking for opinions on their appearance, work, or personal life. 

They may also frequently post on social media, seeking likes, comments, or shares as a form of validation (more on this later). 

This constant need for validation may stem from a lack of self-worth or self-confidence, as they may rely on others to affirm their value and boost their self-esteem.

2) They’re always trying to one-up you

Have you ever been in a conversation with someone who always has to outdo you? I mean, no matter what you share or how amazing your story is, they’ll always have a better or more dramatic one. 

This behavior is a classic sign of an attention-seeker. It’s actually another form of constantly seeking validation.

They have a tendency to compare themselves to others too much, seeking ways to outperform or outshine them. This might show up in various ways, such as: 

  • Boasting about their achievements
  • Inserting themselves into conversations where they feel they can offer a superior perspective 
  • Undermining others to make themselves look better. 

Attention-seekers who engage in one-upmanship often crave the validation and recognition that come from being perceived as the best, which is why they may feel compelled to outdo others at every opportunity.

3) They always have to be the center of attention

Speaking of outdoing others, this one might seem obvious, but it’s worth mentioning just the same. Attention-seekers often have a strong need to be the center of attention in any social setting. 

They might use humor, stories, or even physical displays to draw the focus of those around them. 

They may also be adept at changing the topic of conversation to something that allows them to shine or subtly redirecting attention to themselves when they feel they are being overshadowed.

Simply put, they’ve got to dominate every conversation and hog the spotlight!

This leads me to my next point…

4) They thrive on drama

Oh, drama. Attention-seekers live for it. 

Do you have those kinds of people who just love stirring up a storm? You know, the type that seems to relish conflict? 

If someone is always involved in some kind of drama, there’s a good chance they’re seeking attention. They might create problems or spread gossip just to get people talking about them or to draw others into their emotional whirlwind.

They might exaggerate their emotions, act overly distraught or outraged, or turn minor issues into major crises. This behavior is often an attempt to keep the focus on them and to elicit sympathy or concern from others.

It’s truly exhausting, so be careful around these drama queens!

5) They’re always the “victim”

As they create so much drama, attention-seekers seem to always play a similar role – they’re always the “victim” in whatever latest drama is unfolding. 

What do I mean by this?

Victim mentality shows up like this – the person might constantly complain about their misfortunes or share sob stories with anyone who will listen. 

Attention-seekers often use this tactic to gain sympathy and attention from others. Keep an eye out for those who consistently portray themselves as victims – aside from attention-seeking behavior, it may also be used as a way to manipulate others!

6) They’re always seeking new audiences

attention seeker behaviors If someone displays these 10 behaviors, they're an attention-seeker

Eventually, though, that victim mentality and drama-oriented behavior take their toll on everyone – it gets old pretty quickly!

So, what does the attention-seeker do when that happens? They change their friend group or social circle! 

It all boils down to that incessant need for new audiences to ensure they have a fresh supply of people to impress or entertain. 

They might become bored with their current circle once they feel they’ve exhausted their attention potential and then move on to the next group, leaving a trail of bewildered friends in their wake.

7) Their social media presence is all about them

I don’t know about you, but I find it fascinating to observe people’s social media habits. It can tell you so much about their personality!

An attention-seeker’s social media presence is often all about them – from countless selfies to constant updates on their personal life

Things like vague-posting, starting controversial debates, or posting overly personal information…these are all red flags for attention-seeking behavior.

I once had a Facebook friend who would do this – she’d post cryptic quotes then wait for well-meaning friends to comment and ask what was going on. 

She did this so often that eventually people saw it as just another attention-seeking ploy. 

8) They’re excessively flirtatious

Flirting can be a fun and harmless way to engage with others. However, attention-seekers often use flirtation as a means to draw attention to themselves. 

They might be overly flirtatious with multiple people, even if they’re in a committed relationship. This behavior is often an attempt to keep themselves in the spotlight and to receive validation from others.

So, at its core, excessive flirtation can be driven by deeper insecurities or a need for constant reassurance of one’s attractiveness and desirability. 

9) They have an insatiable need for novelty

As I mentioned earlier, attention-seekers like to keep things fresh. So, they often have an insatiable need for novelty and excitement

They love seeking out new experiences, hobbies, or interests. Now, there’s nothing inherently wrong with that; trying out new experiences is necessary for personal growth. 

But with attention-seekers, it’s not about that. It’s more about the attempt to maintain the interest and attention of those around them.

10) They have a pattern of short-lived, intense relationships

Unfortunately, that need to keep things fresh also extends to their relationships. That’s why attention-seekers often have a history of short-lived, intense relationships – whether romantic or platonic.

At first, they’re deeply invested in a new relationship, only to lose interest once the initial excitement fades. 

This pattern can be an indication that they’re more interested in the attention and validation they receive from a new partner or friend than in building a genuine, lasting connection.

It’s a shame, really, because they’re missing out on the truly important stuff, all because of that need for attention. 


So, there you have it – the top ten behaviors that can indicate someone is an attention-seeker. 

It’s important to note that we all crave attention to some degree; that’s just human nature. However, when attention-seeking behaviors become excessive or manipulative, it could point to deeper emotional issues or insecurities.

If you see any of these behaviors in yourself, it might be worth exploring the underlying reasons and working on building a healthier sense of self-worth

If, on the other hand, you notice these behaviors in others, remember to approach the situation with empathy and understanding. After all, we’re all human, and we’re all just trying to navigate this wild and wonderful world together.

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Tina Fey

Tina Fey

I've ridden the rails, gone off track and lost my train of thought. I'm writing for Ideapod to try and find it again. Hope you enjoy the journey with me.

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