31 traits that reveal a cold-hearted person

It is not easy to recognize what the people we meet daily are all about.

If you’re struggling to keep your distance from a person who is too cold, it may help to know what they’re genuinely like before they draw too close.

Here are 31 traits that reveal a cold-hearted person!

1) They lack empathy

Empathy is the ability to understand the feelings of others, but a cold-hearted person may have difficulty understanding others’ feelings and even their own.

They may appear selfish and insensitive. Here’s the deal – even though this can be hard to accept, they simply function differently than most people.

When they see something upsetting, they tend to dismiss it or brush it off.

They don’t get emotional about things and may even be isolated for long time.

Cold-hearted people are often unable to feel the same warm feelings that you and I have, such as affection for a friend or enjoyment at the birth of a child, because they lack warmth.

2) They have shallow friendships or relationships and don’t have any real friends with whom they form close bonds

A cold-hearted person often has no close friends, even though they outwardly seem like they do.

It’s true that if you get to know them well enough, you’ll find out that they have a lot of acquaintances with whom they have superficial relationships.

They may appear to have a few close friends, but their true friendships are “fake“, and it’s only a matter of time before everyone finds out about their lack of real emotions and the superficial nature of their closest friendships.

3) They are more interested in the money that comes with their position of power than actually trying to help people

A cold-hearted person may be interested in helping others, but only so long as it benefits him.

For example, he is the pastor of a church to earn money and “look good” to the community.

He’s a lawyer to earn money from cases and make a name for himself.

He’s the CEO of an organization because he wants power and control over people.

See what I mean?

Even though these examples relate to men, women can be equally cold-hearted, it is not related to gender.

You may catch yourself being nice to this kind of person despite seeing it clear that this person is using you, simply because you are trying to reach new spiritual heights.

However, it is necessary to stop for a moment.

When it comes to your personal spiritual journey, which toxic habits have you unknowingly picked up?

Is it the need to be positive all the time? Is it a sense of superiority over those who lack spiritual awareness?

Even well-meaning gurus and experts can get it wrong.

The result?

You end up achieving the opposite of what you’re searching for. You do more to harm yourself than to heal.

You may even hurt those around you.

In this eye-opening video, the shaman Rudá Iandé explains how so many of us fall into the toxic spirituality trap. He himself went through a similar experience at the start of his journey.

But with over 30 years of experience in the spiritual field, Rudá now confronts and tackles popular toxic traits and habits.

As he mentions in the video, spirituality should be about empowering yourself. Not suppressing emotions, not judging others, but forming a pure connection with who you are at your core.

If this is what you’d like to achieve, click here to watch the free video.

Even if you’re well into your spiritual journey, it’s never too late to unlearn the myths you’ve bought for truth!

4) They are more concerned about their own safety than others’

A cold-hearted person obviously isn’t concerned with the safety of others all of the time, but they know they generally have a larger amount of power than most other people.

This can be dangerous in a way because if you’re in the same situation as them, it’s likely that they won’t make an effort to help you.

5) They never, ever support anything that is non-mainstream or unpopular among the majority of their peers

A cold-hearted person is ALWAYS going to agree with the majority, which means they can be accepted by their peers.

They’re not original thinkers; instead, they choose to follow what everybody else does.

It doesn’t matter if it’s something as mundane as choosing a restaurant for dinner or something as serious as following destructive peer pressure instead of being true to themselves.

6) They value money and possessions over people, often putting money and pride above things like love, friendship, family, and integrity

It’s easy to see that a cold-hearted person is in it for themselves, but some may deny it – simply because they have trouble admitting to their own selfish and greedy tendencies.

They have their own principles and standards of what’s correct or not correct, and you can argue with them until you’re blue in the face about it.

While it might be true that they hold onto certain beliefs with a tight fist, they will immediately change if given a chance to make more money.

7) They only care about themselves and how they can benefit from situations

A cold-hearted person will never do anything that doesn’t benefit them or their position in some way.

Even if they’re trying to be “nice” by giving you something, they only do it because they think it will benefit them.

A good example of this would be a co-worker who gave you a gift for your birthday; he didn’t give you the gift because he cared about you – he just wanted to make himself look nice in front of his friends and other colleagues.

8) They deliberately hurt people to get what they want

A cold-hearted person will use people like a pawn.

For example, they might be in a position where they can make a lot of money if they create some type of scandal or cause anger, among others, and do it without giving it a second thought.

They don’t care about the person who’s upset – to them it’s just a means to an end.

9) They easily lie and cheat in order to get what they want, often harming others along the way

pexels keira burton 6147117 31 traits that reveal a cold-hearted person

We’ve all known the person who lies to avoid taking responsibility for their own actions, but it can be much worse when the person has no conscience.

A cold-hearted person may have a large group of people that they’re able to use like pawns so they can get what they want without having to face any consequences.

10) They are so self-centered that they are incapable of considering the needs of other people

A cold-hearted person may go through life without realizing that there are other people who have needs that go unfulfilled.

They are so concerned with themselves that they fail to even notice, and sometimes don’t care, that their behavior affects the people around them.

A cold-hearted person doesn’t ever really consider how someone feels but will try to offer a way to “comfort” them – but this is only because they want you to give them something in return.

11) They are very good manipulators and are often devious in their behavior

A cold-hearted person doesn’t care about the consequences of their actions because, to them, their actions are of little consequence.

However, they do expect something in return if they’re going to go through the effort of doing something for someone else.

A manipulative person may be the one who created a fight just to get what they want from you.

This kind of person is always causing drama among family and friends without even realizing it.

So what can you do to protect yourself from this kind of person?

Begin with yourself. Stop searching for external fixes to sort out your life, deep down, you know this isn’t working.

And that’s because until you look within and unleash your personal power, you’ll never find the satisfaction and fulfillment you’re searching for.

I learned this from the shaman Rudá Iandê. His life mission is to help people restore balance to their lives and unlock their creativity and potential. He has an incredible approach that combines ancient shamanic techniques with a modern-day twist.

In his excellent free video, Rudá explains effective methods to achieve what you want in life.

So if you want to build a better relationship with yourself, unlock your endless potential, and put passion at the heart of everything you do, start now by checking out his genuine advice.

Here’s a link to the free video again.

12) They become angry or upset when they can’t get what they want, and they may lash out at others verbally or physically when they feel like they’ve been wronged

A cold-hearted person wants to have a special treatment while not making the same effort for the people around them.

While it’s possible for them to be nice, it’s often only when the other person pleases them or does something for them.

They may scream and yell at you, insult you or harass you to get what they want if they don’t get their way.

13) They are unfeeling and emotionless, with a tendency to turn off their feelings to deal with situations that might be too uncomfortable for them to handle emotionally

A cold-hearted person doesn’t let their emotions get in the way of what they’re trying to accomplish.

This means that they might be cruel to someone simply because they don’t care about making them feel bad or being nasty or because they want some type of reaction from that person.

14) They may lie when it suits them, and they will often tell outrageous lies that are completely out of proportion with the situation

Listening to their lies may leave you confused for a second, but make no mistake about it: they know they’re lying – it’s a conscious decision on their part.

A cold-hearted person will often lie out of pure convenience (i.e., lying to avoid being punished for doing something wrong or being able to get away with cheating or stealing).

15) They have very little sympathy for other people and have no problem making light of misfortune or hardship

A cold-hearted person doesn’t feel for other people because the people around them don’t affect them in any real way.

This is why they will never admit when they are wrong, even when they have done something wrong or hurt someone else!

16) They can’t stand to be wrong in any way, and they will often invalidate or ignore what others have to say if it means they can come out on top or prove someone else wrong

A cold-hearted person has a very hard time admitting when they’re wrong about anything.

If someone tells them they’re wrong in some way, the likely outcome is that their reaction will be to try to defend themselves instead.

They will often invalidate what others say or do.

17) They love to put others down in front of other people in an attempt to make themselves seem better than they really are

A cold-hearted person will find a way to come off as the most important person in the room.

Even when they’re in a crowd, they manage to make everyone else feel like they are inferior and have no chance at being important in any way.

18) They wiggle their way into any position of power and authority, which they will abuse to control others

A cold-hearted person has no qualms about taking advantage of the people around them.

They are always willing to lie, cheat, or steal to get what they want.

They will also use their power and influence to manipulate others into doing things for them.

They might not do it in a malicious way (but their actions will be negative), but they will often find a way to do something that hurts other people in some way instead of supporting them.

19) They can’t accept responsibility for their own actions

A cold-hearted person will always place blame on someone else for their own mistakes.

In fact, they will often find a way to make it seem like you’re the one that’s at fault and will often blame others if they have made mistakes – even though they were at least partially responsible for the mistakes themselves!

20) They are obsessed with self-promotion and will often use others to do it for them

A cold-hearted person will use the people around them to gain a reputation for themselves.

They are always looking for an opportunity to put their name out there in any way possible!

A cold-hearted person doesn’t care about anyone’s feelings because they have none of their own.

This can make it difficult if you happen to be in a relationship with one, but it can be manageable if you know what signs to watch out for.

21) They pay attention to every word they say

They feel like they have to watch what they say, so they are always careful not to say the wrong thing around people who might be able to make their life difficult or ruin it in some way!

This kind of behavior shows extreme distrust and inability to genuinely connect with other people.

22) They wiggle their way into people’s lives, often becoming manipulative and controlling because they want the spotlight on them

pexels yan krukov 7640473 31 traits that reveal a cold-hearted person

A cold-hearted person doesn’t try to be a part of everything that is going on around them, but will try to find their way into the lives of people that interest them.

They might try to get involved with one thing or another, but they aren’t genuinely concerned about those people.

They prefer to do their own thing and feel no obligation to anyone else!

23) They are very knowledgeable and always have a way of making themselves seem smarter than they really are

This is often a tactic to show off in order to make themselves look more important and better than others, which they consider inferior.

You can probably recognize narcissistic traits of personality because these traits tend to overlap with narcissism.

24) They aren’t very brave

They will often avoid risks or even situations that might result in failure so that they don’t have to expose their true selves in any way and don’t get into any trouble.

A cold-hearted person will never try something unless they know they’re going to succeed.

Rather than expose themselves or fail, they would rather not risk it at all!

25) They can be extremely cruel and have no problem hurting anyone else because it doesn’t affect them in any way either way!

A cold-hearted person will never feel any guilt or remorse for any of the pain they have caused.

In fact, they will often say that it didn’t happen in the first place!

26) They will always blame others when things go wrong

When things start going downhill, you can bet that a cold-hearted person will be the first one to point the finger at everyone else.

They know that they’re at fault, so they will do their best to make it seem like it is not their fault and make you feel bad for them!

27) They expect others to care more about them than they do, which often results in a feeling of resentment towards those they consider ‘inconsiderate’ towards them

A cold-hearted person expects everyone else to give them more attention and make more care or effort in order to achieve things.

They often seem to resent those around them who are less than considerate because they feel that they have done the most for them.

28) They are very selfish and think that their needs come before anyone else’s, even if it means ignoring or hurting other people to get what they want

A cold-hearted person will never think about anyone else before they think about themselves.

They don’t care about other people and only focus on themselves, even if it means hurting someone else in the process!

29) They never take responsibility for their own actions, instead they start blaming the environment that surrounded them at the time

A cold-hearted person often finds a way to make it seem like everything was outside of their own control during a time when they made a mistake or hurt someone else.

They often play the role of a victim.

30) They have low self-esteem and tend to feel depressed, anxious, or unhappy most of the time

Cold-hearted people will never be happy with themselves.

They might think that they are great, but they don’t act like it in any way or feel like they can accomplish anything.

They have very low self-esteem, which makes them often depressed and even anxious.

A cold-hearted person doesn’t do anything for fun, even if it is fun to others!

A cold-hearted person doesn’t care about others’ feelings and is more concerned about their own needs than anyone else’s.

31) They would rather make trouble for themselves or others than give or accept any kind of help from anyone!

Every person who is well connected with family and friends would ask for help if the need arises for it.

However, a cold-hearted person doesn’t want to be seen as weak, but they also don’t want to feel obligated to return the favor later on.

Final thoughts

It is not always easy to recognize a cold-hearted person because they can hide very well behind various masks.

While you cannot change them, you can always change yourself and work on strengthening your boundaries so you can better protect yourself from their negative intentions.

So, what can you do to keep such persons away from you?

If you’ve spent so long trying to stay in control of your feelings and cannot stand feeling bad because of cold-hearted people anymore, it is time for you to do something.

If that’s the case, I highly recommend watching this free breathwork video, created by the shaman, Rudá Iandê.

Rudá isn’t another self-professed life coach. Through shamanism and his own life journey, he’s created a modern-day twist to ancient healing techniques.

The exercises in his invigorating video combine years of breathwork experience and ancient shamanic beliefs, designed to help you relax and check in with your body and soul.

After many years of suppressing my emotions, Rudá’s dynamic breathwork flow quite literally revived that connection.

And that’s what you need:

A spark to reconnect you with your feelings so that you can begin focusing on the most important relationship of all – the one you have with yourself.

So, if you’re ready to take back control over your mind, body, and soul, if you’re ready to say goodbye to anxiety and stress, check out his genuine advice below.

Here’s a link to the free video again.

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Picture of Tina Fey

Tina Fey

I've ridden the rails, gone off track and lost my train of thought. I'm writing for Ideapod to try and find it again. Hope you enjoy the journey with me.

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