Mind & Body

“Will I ever find love?” Not if you keep doing these 5 things…

Okay, so it’s another Saturday night and you are curled up on the sofa wondering what the hell is wrong with you because you don’t have a date – AGAIN!

All of your friends have dates, boyfriends, husbands and there’s nothing special about them, right?

So why can’t you find someone to love you?

This is going to be a hard pill to swallow, but have you ever thought that maybe you are the problem?

Your friends have dates, boyfriends, and husbands because they aren’t you.

Ouch, I know. That’s harsh. But stay with me here for a second.

What if the reason you aren’t happily attached to another human being is that you are doing things that don’t attract other human beings?

Double ouch.

If you haven’t found love yet and you feel like you’ve tried everything, consider that maybe you haven’t tried everything, and then read this list of 5 things you need to know if you haven’t found love.

And be open to exploring these reasons.

The answer you seek could be right here and you aren’t open to seeing it. Go ahead and stay single then, we are just trying to help you here.

1) You Ask Too Much of People

Have you ever considered that you are putting too much pressure on people to be awesome all the time?

You know love is not really like that, right?

Prince Charming wakes up with bad breath and needs to comb his hair, too.

No one is perfect and you need to stop thinking that you are perfect so you deserve perfect.

You deserve someone who will make you happy. But that’s about it.

The fact that we even think we deserve love is a misnomer.

We desire it, but do we really deserve it? Don’t we have to work for it? We can’t just sit around and think it’s going to magically appear.

2) You Expect Too Much of People

You want it all and you think you’ve found it time and time again only to be disappointed. You can’t have a boyfriend who makes millions of dollars in his own company AND is someone who will whisk you away on a weekend getaway.

If he’s hauling ass to build a company, you need to sit tight while he does his thing.

Another thing to consider is the rate at which you expect a relationship to move.

If you have only just met and you are wondering why he’s not blowing up your phone, ask yourself what you have going on that would make him want to do that?

Don’t you have a job you should be doing right now? Of course he isn’t texting you a million times day, people have jobs.

3) You Don’t Think You Need to Change

Thinking you are great just the way you are is awesome, but if you haven’t found that person that makes you feel whole, you might want to take a look at your half of the equation.

Consider that there’s something about you that isn’t attracting the right kind of man.

And we don’t mean you looks – we mean your personality, your demands, you work schedule.

Perhaps you haven’t left the house in three weeks and are genuinely wondering why no one is calling you for a date.

Wake up to the bullshit you are feeding yourself and you might find things start to change.

4) You are Picking The Wrong People

Let’s say you have found lots of great guys you could be in a relationship with but when it’s time to get serious, he just bails.

On the flip side, it might not be you. It might be that you are picking the wrong kind of guy to be with.

It’s not unheard of – some women are perpetually attracting to the wrong kind of guy. It’s just what happens. It’s also called self-sabotage.

You pick the same kind of guy over and over again and then you don’t have to find Mr. Right and settle down. Sound familiar?

5) You Don’t See the Writing on the Wall

There could be a guy standing right in front of you telling you how beautiful you are and asking for your number and you are so clueless that you don’t see what is happening.

Again, this is a form of self-sabotage and you could be committing it more than you know. Do you want love to find you or do you want to stay the sad sap that can’t find love?

We hang on to our stories pretty hard and they soon become our identities. If you never let Gerry take you out, how will you know if Gerry isn’t the one?

Don’t judge a book by its cover, remember? You might need to crack a few eggs to make this omelet, but unless you let people into your life, you’ll never know what’s possible.

NOW WATCH: 5 unconventional tips on how to be happy


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Lachlan Brown

Lachlan Brown

I'm the editor-in-chief of Ideapod and also the founder of Hack Spirit. I enjoy writing articles that are read by millions of people.

One Comment

  • AJ Front says:

    Pretty heavy gender bias, blaming women for not finding love because they want their millionaire boyfriends to text too much, lol

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