4 spiritual reasons why you can’t stop thinking about someone

Are you wondering why you constantly find yourself thinking about someone?

There’s 4 big spiritual reasons this person might be on your mind.

Here are my experiences and the spiritual meanings behind this trap of thinking.

My experiences thinking about certain people

I can pinpoint a few instances where I’ve obsessively thought about someone – whether it’s numerous times a day or every few days.

I’ll tell you about a couple.

You might be able to guess what I’m about to say.

And, chances are, it’s the same for you.

My ex-partner is one person who I often find on my mind.

Sound familiar?

I often find myself wondering what they’re doing, whether they’re thinking about me (or when they last thought about me), and what they’re like today.

I wonder what the people they surround themselves with are like and what they all talk about.

I wonder what he’ll think about the fact I’m in a new relationship already and what he’d think of him.

It’s like an obsessive thought loop and I find it quite frustrating because I don’t understand it.

There’s something very significant to note:

I don’t want to get back with this partner.

We ended our relationship last year because we have fundamental long-term differences, like I want children and to get married, and he doesn’t.

We made a decision we are both accepting of today.

Plus, I’m with someone new now and incredibly happy to be with him.

I’m proud of the steps I took last year to end the relationship because it allowed for such an incredible relationship with my new partner that’s much more in alignment with who I am today.

However, here’s the thing: my ex pops up in my mind frequently.

I could be looking at myself in the mirror and he comes into my mind, or I’m checking my emails and I get a pang of curiosity where I wonder if he’s been in contact.

He’s in my mind a bit too much for my liking and I’m trying to understand why this might be.

And he’s not the only one I can’t stop thinking about.

Strangely enough, this other person is someone I’ve not even met and I doubt I ever will.

It’s just an imaginary image I have of them.

Again, you might guess what’s coming…

It’s my new partner’s ex that I obsessively think about.

I see her name everywhere and try to imagine what she looks like from what he’s described. I’ve just about resisted the urge to stalk her on social media.

I wonder what she was like, what they were like together and whether my new partner would leave me if she walked back in his life.

I just don’t know why I can’t shake these people from my mind.

What does this mean for you?

If you’re here I’m going to guess you can’t get someone off your mind and you want to know why.

You’re just like me.

I’m desperate to unpick the real reason these people keep popping up in my mind.

Perhaps there’s just the one person or maybe you’re in a similar situation where you obsess over people in the context of love.

I’m going to deep dive into what’s going on spiritually.

Why can’t I stop thinking about someone?

Writing for Love Connection, Lyndol Lyons explains that you might be thinking about someone for various reasons.

She suggests it could be that:

  • You’re still in love with them
  • They’ve passed away
  • You’ve just met and you can’t get them out of your mind
  • There are unresolved issues

The first two don’t resonate with me personally, but they might with you.

The other two, however, definitely resonate for me in relation to my ex and my new relationship.

I’ll explain the spiritual meanings behind some of the above reasons.

4 spiritual meanings behind why we think of someone

1) You need to make peace

You know those stories where people forgive others for awful situations just to let go of anger that only harms them? Well, this point is a little like that.

The reason you keep thinking of someone might be because it’s a spiritual sign that you need to do some internal work and let go.

You need to breathe.

But I get it, letting go can be hard, especially if you’ve been going around in circles for some time.

If that’s the case, I highly recommend watching this free breathwork video, created by the shaman, Rudá Iandê.

Rudá isn’t another self-professed life coach. Through shamanism and his own life journey, he’s created a modern-day twist to ancient healing techniques.

The exercises in his invigorating video combine years of breathwork experience and ancient shamanic beliefs, designed to help you relax and check in with your body and soul.

After many years of suppressing my emotions, Rudá’s dynamic breathwork flow quite literally revived that connection.

And that’s what you need:

A spark to reconnect you with your feelings so that you can begin focusing on the most important relationship of all – the one you have with yourself.

So if you’re ready to say goodbye to anxiety and stress, check out his genuine advice below.

Click here to watch the free video.

Making peace with the situation and letting go is not an external job but something you need to work through yourself without that person.

Like me, maybe you have some unresolved issues with the specific person who keeps coming up.

After doing the breathwork video, make note of what these are so you can get some clarity.

Now, there’s two ways of approaching it:

You could either decide to speak to that person and address the issues or arrive at a place of peace yourself.

In the case of thinking about my ex and my partner’s ex, my best option is the latter.

I’m thinking about situations that are done and gone – people that aren’t around anymore.

I know it’s no good being stuck in the past: I need to move on from these thoughts.

It’s only me that’s pained from thinking about these people constantly.

The good news?

I have the free will and power to decide to move forward from these situations and accept the circumstances.

You can do the same.

Personally, I’m doing this through a few different ways.

I decided to make some notes to help me get clarity and move me to a more conclusive place.

In the case of my ex partner, I’m going to remember:

  • I’m allowed to be in a new relationship and it doesn’t matter what he thinks
  • He’s allowed to be with someone else
  • We made the decision to end our relationship
  • Our relationship served its purpose for a period of our lives

And in the case of my partner’s ex, I’m going to think:

  • She was in his life for a time for a specific reason: she helped him open up
  • He’s not going to run off if she magically reappears
  • Comparison isn’t helpful

These thoughts will allow me to make peace.

As I say, make a list of the ways in which you can make peace with the situation and return to them as and when this person appears in your mind’s-eye.

2) They’re visiting you

If you can’t stop thinking about someone who recently died, there might be a powerful spiritual reason for this.

It might mean that this person is actually visiting you.

Similar to my situation, you might feel like things are unresolved and you want to see them.

What does this mean for you?

Take note of the dream and what they communicate to you.

Use the opportunity to journal and, as I say above, make peace with the circumstances.

If you are grieving, be kind to yourself and try to get support through the five-step grieving process.

It includes going through:

  • Denial
  • Anger
  • Bargaining
  • Depression
  • Acceptance

The final stage of acceptance is where you will ultimately find peace.

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3) They’re trying to tell you something

This one is a bit cryptic – and it suggests that you and this person are telepathic.

It’s a bold suggestion, but a possible spiritual reason for thinking of someone is that they’re trying to tell you something.

It could be that maybe this person is trying to communicate something very important with you.

This might be true in the case of people who are alive or who have passed.

Make note of the thoughts you have about this person and the messages that come through: writing down your thoughts in a journal is a good way to help you reflect.

4) You’re falling in love

So it’s not an ex-partner or a recently passed loved one that you’re thinking about, but your new lover?

Chances are, spiritually, this suggests you’re falling hard for them.

You’re infatuated and falling head over heels in love with them.

First things first, don’t suppress any of your feelings.

Secondly, communicate honestly and clearly with this person.

Make sure you’re on the same page and want the same things in the short- and long-term.

For example, I know my new partner and I both want to get married and have children, and we both want to travel and experience new cultures.

These are all really important non-negotiables for me.

In my experience, it’s a wonderful feeling falling for someone.

I’m sure you agree?

In my own experience, in this new relationship, I can confidently say he’s consumed a lot of my waking thoughts.

This has fluctuated over the time we’ve known each other and as the relationship has progressed over the past six months – but, on the whole, it’s fair to say he’s taken up a lot of my mental space.

It’s normal to sink a lot of time into a new flame at the start of the relationship, but it’s also important that you retain your sense of self and keep working on yourself.

Make sure you’re carving out enough time for you if you are navigating the start of a new relationship.

I know this is easier said than done when you just want to snuggle with this person and spend hours chatting on the phone.

Often people’s grades slip and they don’t spend as much time with their friends and family when they get with someone new.

It’s because this person is consuming all of our thoughts. Don’t be alarmed and think you’re obsessing too much if you find this person often in your thoughts, it’s normal when you’re in a new relationship.

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Picture of Tina Fey

Tina Fey

I've ridden the rails, gone off track and lost my train of thought. I'm writing for Ideapod to try and find it again. Hope you enjoy the journey with me.

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