Nothing is more stressful than trying to work through a breakup and constantly wondering if your ex is still in love with you.
Although it’s best to be as open-minded as possible, this post will show you 9 signs that your ex is trying to make you jealous and how you can respond correctly.
9 undeniable signs your ex is trying to make you jealous
1) You start seeing their new partner in the same places where you used to hang out
Have you ever noticed that you keep bumping into your ex and their new partner at the same places where you used to hang out as a couple?
This is not just a coincidence. Chances are, they’re doing this on purpose.
They’re hoping that you’ll come to the conclusion that their new partner is basically your replacement and make a move.
An additional benefit of this method is that it provides more opportunities for them to make it clear to everyone else around them how great things are now with their new partner (including you).
But here’s the thing:
Don’t get mad if they continue to do this. Remember, they are pretty much acting of their own free will.
2) They mention your name a lot in conversation
You might think that it’s a good sign if they name-drop you a lot.
Yes, it is!
But the problem is, they’re not doing this of their own free will. It’s an attempt to make you jealous and prove how great everything is when you’re not around.
For example, you might catch your ex saying something like:
“Oh, I’m so glad we found someone with her kind of experience. She always knows how to solve these problems.”
Don’t be offended. They’re just trying to make you jealous… and you can probably turn this to your advantage if you act correctly.
3) Your ex talks about how happy they are with their current life
I bet you never thought that your ex would talk about how great their life is going now that you’re not in it.
And yet, here they are talking about how much better their life is without your drama. And yes, they’re doing this to make you jealous.
The best part?
You can turn this to your advantage if you handle it correctly. Simply listen intently and ask how exactly they’ve improved their life.
When they ask you the same question, you’ll have the perfect opportunity to talk about specific ways in which your life has improved since they’ve left.
Do this with confidence and don’t be afraid to name-drop.
4) They start to change the way they dress and act when they’re around you
There’s no doubt that when people are trying to make you jealous, they start to dress and act a little differently around you.
They do this on purpose to try and get a reaction out of you by making it seem like they’re more successful with their new partner than they were with you.
Don’t be fooled.
Most of these changes are temporary and often only make small improvements in their appearance and lifestyle.
Here are several signs that show that these changes are temporary:
– The new clothes don’t fit as well as the old ones.
– The new hairstyle doesn’t look quite as good as the previous one.
– Their new lifestyle isn’t quite as nice as it was when you two were together.
These are just a few examples that show that most of these changes aren’t sincere.
5) They make out with other people in front of you
If you ever catch your ex making out with another person in front of you (or doing something else that makes it clear that they like each other), don’t make a big deal out of it.
They’re just trying to make you jealous, that’s it.
Just smile and say something like, “have fun!” or “it looks like things are going well for you these days.
Don’t forget that they might be doing this to make you jealous but they’re also vulnerable and don’t want to show how fragile they are.
Keep in mind that they might have been through a lot of changes and are trying to protect their insides by pretending like everything is fine.
If you really want to take it a step further, you could also mention how nice it is for them to be able to move on with their lives without you messing things up for them (You do understand that once your ex finds out how much you helped them in the past, they might start the process of getting back together).
6) They remind you of the promises they made when you were together now that they’re with someone else
Remember all the promises they made to you when you were together?
They told you that they would spend the rest of their lives together and made a bunch of other similar promises as well.
Or maybe they said that they couldn’t wait to get married and have children?
They might suddenly start talking about these things now that they’re with someone else. They’re doing this to make you jealous, nothing more… and don’t let it get to you.
This not only shows that they want to make you jealous but also that they’re not holding up their part of the deal.
If they really wanted to get their ex back, they wouldn’t be able to think of anything but you.
In other words, you might be dealing with someone who has no idea how to be happy without you in their life.
7) They’re telling people that they don’t need you anymore
They’re telling people that they’ve finally found someone who can replace you. And if that wasn’t enough, they may even be saying some really nasty things about you.
Although this might be upsetting at first, don’t get too worked up about it.
You shouldn’t take their words too seriously because this is a clear sign that they miss you and have probably never been able to move on from the relationship.
Another possibility is that they want to get you back and are angry at you because they feel that you’re the reason why they’re not happy right now. Maybe they stuck with a rebound relationship after the breakup and are now experiencing a lot of their rebound partner’s negativity.
Regardless of the reason, this is a clear sign that they’re unhappy in their life and could be looking for any way possible to recreate the happiness that you two shared together.
8) They text you constantly but are always busy when you want to talk
If you catch your ex texting you frequently (once every day, once every hour) and when you try to respond they don’t respond back… this is a clear sign that they’re trying to make you jealous.
They might want you to think that they’re spending all their free time with their new partner, but the truth is that they may be trying to make you jealous by making you think that they’re happier with someone else.
If this happens often enough, you’ll want to take action before you end up feeling like a little puppy dog. Don’t wait until it’s too late and you end up getting totally crushed.
9) Their social media is filled with pictures of them with someone else
Another sign that they’re trying to get you jealous is when your ex’s social media is filled with pictures of them with someone else.
They might have even posted professional-looking pictures of them in comparison to the previous pictures that you two used to take together.
They might even say how happy they are now that they’ve found someone who can complete them in life.
If you catch them doing this for some reason, don’t be too hard on them. Every relationship is different and some people need more time to get over their ex than others.
This doesn’t mean that they don’t want you back, it’s just that they need a little more time.
How to respond to your ex if they’re trying to make you jealous
Now that we’ve told you what signs to look out for, we’ll also show you how to respond if your ex ever tries to make you jealous.
1) Get tailor-made advice for your situation
While the points in this article will help you deal with your ex trying to make you jealous, it can be helpful to speak to a relationship coach about your situation.
That’s what I recently did.
When I was at the worst point in my relationship I reached out to a relationship coach to see if they could give me any answers or insights.
I expected some vague advice about cheering up or being strong.
But surprisingly I got very in-depth, specific, and practical advice about addressing the problems in my relationship. This included real solutions to improving many things that my partner and I had been struggling with for years.
Relationship Hero is where I found this special coach who helped turn things around for me. They are perfectly placed to help you with your ex is trying to make you jealous too.
Relationship Hero is a hugely popular relationship coaching site because they provide solutions, not just talk.
In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice specific to your situation.
2) Don’t pick a fight
You don’t want this to turn into a fight.
If your ex is trying to make you jealous, their entire focus is on causing you pain. But your entire focus should be on enjoying your life.
In most situations like these, the person who’s more emotionally mature is the person who comes out on top in the end.
I know it sounds counter-intuitive but it’s true.
If you try to talk sense into someone who’s determined to be petty and negative, they’ll just make a bigger scene. And that’s the last thing you want because it will only push your ex away further.
Instead, try to appear as happy and content as possible when dealing with them. Let them have things their way for a little while in order for them to realize that you’re happier without them in your life.
3) Let them have their “fun” with their new partner
The best thing that you can do right now is to give them space and let them have their fun.
Don’t call or text them. Don’t try to meet up with them or see them if they come around and talk to you.
Give the relationship between you and your ex the time it needs to sort itself out. If this means that you have to go through a few weeks of awkwardness, then so be it.
You can’t rush things with your ex.
You have to be patient and wait for the right time to re-enter their life. It will happen when it happens. Just let them have their fun and take things slow.
4) Create a new group of friends who support you 100%
Don’t underestimate the value of a good group of friends to help you through this time.
It can be hard to find real friends who support you 100% of the time, but it’s very important that you do. Try to remove any naysayers from your life and only surround yourself with people who will help pull you up and make you feel better about yourself.
5) Be assertive and tell them you don’t appreciate the behavior
If your ex was making demands from you, disrespecting you, or not giving you what you deserved in life, would you put up with it for long? Of course not.
If your ex is doing the same thing right now, don’t.
Just like that, the relationship between the two of us went completely sour and I eventually ended up getting my heart broken.
But the key here is to not get into a long, drawn-out fight. If you don’t stand up for yourself and make your own needs clear, then your ex will always walk all over you.
But if you do it in a calm and assertive way, then it doesn’t have to be this way. This way, your ex will have no choice but to respect you. And hopefully, they won’t respond by trying to upset you even more.
6) Make sure you stay true to yourself and your relationship goals
The last tip I want to share with you is about staying true to yourself and your relationship goals.
When dealing with a negative, jealous ex, it’s easy to get sucked in and start chasing after every tiny, little thing they do. They will give you a portion of the relationship they feel they deserve in exchange for you getting over them.
But this means that you’re not being true to yourself or your relationship goals at all.
Because if you were to follow suit, you’d start giving in to your ex’s demands as well.
And then it would end up like all of your other failed relationships. None of them ended up the way that you wanted due to your lack of consistency and commitment to your goals.
Get it together and be true to yourself and your relationship goals by ignoring what they do and focusing on what you want. If you do that, things will work out for the best in the long run.
We’ve covered a lot of important points here.
I hope it was useful for you to see that you don’t have to let your ex manipulate or control you by trying to make you jealous. If anything, their behavior just shows how immature they are and how little they respect you.
If you find yourself in a situation like this, then I want to remind you that there’s light at the end of the tunnel.
You’ll be able to find a partner who’s truly turned over a new leaf. They’ll respect you and value your role in their life.
But if there’s a part of you that genuinely wants your ex back, you need the help of a professional.
I’ve mentioned Brad Browning throughout this article – he’s the best at helping couples move past their issues and reconnect on a genuine level.
His tried and tested methods won’t just re-spark your ex’s interest in you, but they’ll also help you avoid making the same mistakes you made in the past.
So if you really want a shot at getting back together with your ex for good, check out his excellent free video below.