It’s not uncommon for people to feel guilty when they know they’ve done something wrong.
But some people are more vocal than others, and there are a few signs that your significant other is feeling guilty (or ashamed) about hurting you.
Sometimes, you will ask yourself, “ Does she feel guilty after hurting you?”
In this blog post, we’ll explore 11 signs of guilt in order to help you be better equipped to handle these situations.
1) She’s withdrawn
This is a sign you’ve probably seen because it’s been done to us plenty of times before in the past.
A guilty partner will often withdraw when they feel guilty for hurting you.
To keep you at arm’s length, she avoids social interactions with you. If she’s cutting you out of her life, then her heart probably isn’t in the friendship either.
Furthermore, a guilty partner will withdraw because they don’t want to be hurt again. They don’t want to be reminded of what they did. They don’t want to feel bad.
Quite simply, they want to avoid pain and they’re doing it by withdrawing from you.
Guilty partners try to avoid you. They might even make up excuses for not talking to you.
However, when push comes to shove, they’ll most likely talk to you. Once they do, you’ll know that they feel guilty for hurting you.
When you stop seeing her on a regular basis, she doesn’t even have the decency to contact you until she needs something anymore – which maybe never.
2) She avoids being around you
She will often say that she feels guilty when she is around you. If this is the case, you might want to consider why.
Since the more you spend time together, the more you’ll notice this. You’ll probably feel a lot guiltier when they’re around compared to when you’re alone.
Furthermore, she doesn’t want to “accidentally” run into you or have a friendly interaction with you.
Guys: this is a great sign. Of course, the guilty girl wouldn’t want to see you because she’s trying to avoid you, but you deserve to know she cares.
Or you’ll get weird messages from her like “I can’t hang out tonight” or “I’m busy this weekend”. If she’s busy, that can mean many things like working, going to school or studying, seeing friends, and having a party.
Or maybe instead of spending time with you, she will often say that they have work or other commitments that they need to attend to.
Here’s the deal – feelings of guilt usually last for a few weeks. After that, guilty partners will feel better and want to spend more time with you.
3) She doesn’t return calls and texts
How are you supposed to feel when someone you love doesn’t even text or call you back? Whatever you do, don’t take it as an intentional slap in the face. This is a sign of guilt, not anger.
If your partner doesn’t even have the courtesy to respond to your texts or calls, then chances are they feel extremely guilty for hurting you.
When she doesn’t want to see you anymore…” Hey…I don’t know why I keep calling you.. ” This is one of the most popular ways to get away with ignoring someone who has done something wrong in the relationship.
You shouldn’t have to beg for their attention. You shouldn’t have to beg them to talk to you. And, above all, you shouldn’t have to beg them to text you back!
4) She tries to save you from getting hurt
It’s normal to want to protect the people she loves from getting hurt. But, when she feels guilty for hurting you, she goes above and beyond to try to shield you from getting hurt. She might even try to shield them from making mistakes.
This can be a good thing, but usually, it’s overkill. You have every right to step in when someone you care about is getting hurt.
Sometimes, we’re not even aware of how much someone means to us until they’re gone.
Over time, you might realize that a certain person makes you feel guilty, but you don’t want to let go of the relationship out of fear. It can be a struggle, but it’s important to remember that you don’t have to let go of anyone who makes you feel guilty.
5) She feels bad about herself
If a girl makes you feel bad about yourself, she doesn’t want to feel bad anymore. So she wants you to change so she can feel good again.
If she constantly does this, it should be a huge red flag. She wants you to make mistakes so she can feel better about herself.
Remember, the only person who can make you feel better is you. If you let a girl make you feel bad about yourself, you’ll just end up getting discouraged. You’ll think, “I’m never going to be good enough.”
You only have control over yourself. You can’t control other people, so don’t let someone else’s bad behavior affect your self-worth.
However, there’s a way to help her understand you still care for her and guide her to stop feeling bad.
Believe it or not, speaking to a relationship coach can be an effective way to do so.
Relationship Hero is where I found this special coach who helped turn things around for me. They are perfectly placed to help you after being hurt by your loved one.
Regardless of how complicated your relationship is, I’m sure they can provide personalized advice and offer practical solutions to help you navigate this tough situation.
So, don’t hesitate to contact them, explain how bad she feels after hurting you, and ask for solutions to save your relationship.
6) She tries to overcompensate and do something to make up
A guilty person often tries to make up for their mistake by doing something “more.”
This could be in the form of an apology, a gift, or another gesture to “make things up” in their mind. This could also be in the form of being excessively generous or trying to “do a favor” for you.
When she is trying to make up for hurting you, she might do a lot of things, but overcompensation and doing something to “make up” are often the most obvious signs.
Instead, try to compensate by genuinely trying to make up for your misdeed – like, offering to drive them home or buy them a coffee as an apology. If you overcompensate, your date will know and you’ll end up looking like a desperate person.
7) She gives you some space and doesn’t try to pressure or guilt-trip you into talking with her or spending time with her (and then pressuring you).
This is one of the most definitive signs that your partner is feeling guilty for hurting you. And this is especially true if it happens for a time period that’s longer than usual.
If your partner is giving you space and not trying to pressure you into speaking to her or spending time with her, it’s a good sign that she’s feeling bad about what she did.
She is intuitive and understands that this situation needs time to settle. She’s not going to pressure you into anything because she doesn’t have any intention of rushing things or making the problem worse by pressuring you.
The last thing on her mind would be bringing up your past fight in an effort to force a reconciliation (which we all know never works).
8) She constantly makes you feel like you’re the bad one!
This is one of the signs that your partner isn’t really guilty of hurting you. A guilty partner will make you feel like you’re the bad guy.
This is a tricky one. If your partner constantly tells you that you’re the one who is being bad and needs to change, it’s a sign that she feels guilty.
She might not be able to take care of herself, not being able to fix things, and not being able to make herself happy. No one should ever feel guilty for being a person.
If your partner constantly makes you feel like you’re the bad one, then chances are she feels guilty for hurting you.
9) She constantly apologizes
A guilty person apologizes a lot. When she does something that you don’t like, she apologizes profusely for it and makes sure you feel like it was your fault for being upset about it.
Or she goes overboard apologizing for things, like when a friend forgets to show up for dinner. There’s nothing wrong with acknowledging that you were upset about something, even if it wasn’t your fault.
While you should forgive your partner and understand that she is not perfect, you should also understand that a mistake should not be met with constant apologies and “please forgive me” statements.
If your partner keeps apologizing, this means she is trying to make herself feel better and you should keep your distance as much as you can.
You should also try to let her know that you understand why she did what she did and that you forgive her for it, but you don’t have to feel guilty about it.
But, when she is constantly apologizing for things, it’s a sign that they feel guilty.
10) She will not be happy if you are hurting
Guilt often leads to trying to protect others from getting hurt. If your partner is trying to save you from getting hurt, there’s a chance she feels guilty about something.
Or, one of the clear signs that your girl is guilty of hurting you is her refusal to move forward first. She cannot afford to be happy knowing you are still miserable.
She may not show any emotions when you are hurting because she knows she caused the pain.
That’s why a guilty partner will not be happy if you are hurting. This shows that she feels guilty and wants to help you out.
She doesn’t want you to be sad and she doesn’t want you to think bad thoughts about her, so she is trying to cheer you up and make you feel better.
If she frequently posted about their social life and happiness on social media before, now she can’t do it anymore. You might also hear from your common friends that she stopped going out with other guys or refuses to date until you find a new girlfriend.
Good partners will be happy when you are hurt because they want you to get better and they know they caused the pain.
It’s important to remember that protecting someone from getting hurt is often a sign of guilt, and you should try to not take it the wrong way.
Try to not make things about yourself, and instead, try to understand that your partner may be trying to protect you from getting hurt.
11) She tries to bring you back with her
Typically, after breaking up with her lover, a girl will not be the one to initiate reconciliation.
When you observe any of these signs, there is a high chance that your partner feels guilty for hurting you.
Your girl wants to get back together and says she is willing to do everything possible in order for you two to reconcile again- this means that she really feels guilty about breaking your heart.
That’s why even though it lowers her pride somewhat and doubles the effort of showing how much love she has for you- she still does it because at least now there is a chance for peace between you two.
Or maybe she wants to make it up to you, but she doesn’t want to get into trouble with the law or ruin their career or their reputation.
When she showed one of the signs above. It means that she feels guilty. It may not have been intentional, but if she went out of her way to do something that would make you feel better.