It’s no secret that mutual attraction is one of the key factors behind happiness in a relationship.
But how do you know the attraction is mutual?
You’ll be happy to find out that there are some very specific indicators!
Here are 20 signs of mutual attraction that can’t be ignored.
1) You both enjoy spending time alone together
A big sign of mutual attraction is when you two enjoy spending time alone together.
Think about it: do you want to spend time alone with someone you are not attracted to at all?
Of course not!
You wouldn’t want to spend time alone with someone you don’t like, would you?
The same goes for a potential partner. If you are both comfortable being alone together, then the attraction is mutual.
2) You both tend to laugh at the same things
Another sign of mutual attraction is when you both tend to laugh at the same things. This can be something very small like witty remarks or jokes.
It doesn’t matter what it is, as long as it shows that you two have similar senses of humor!
Humor is actually a huge part of feeling attracted to someone, believe it or not!
Have you ever seen a couple and thought one of them was WAY out of the other one’s league?
Well, chances are good that they have a really similar sense of humor!
Believe it or not, being able to laugh together makes you more attractive to other people!
So, if you laugh at the same things, chances are good the attraction is mutual!
3) You trigger their inner hero
If you’re a woman and you want to find out if a guy is attracted to you, watch whether or not you trigger his inner hero.
There’s actually a psychological term for what I’m talking about here. It’s called the ‘hero instinct’.
This concept is generating a lot of buzz at the moment as a way to explain what really drives men in relationships.
I know it might all seem kind of silly. In this day and age, women don’t need someone to rescue them. They don’t need a ‘hero’ in their lives.
But this misses the point about what the hero instinct is all about.
The hero instinct is an instinctive need that men have to step up to the plate for the woman in their lives. This is deeply rooted in male biology.
When a man genuinely feels like your everyday hero, he’ll become more loving, attentive, and committed to being in a long-term relationship with you.
But how do you trigger this instinct in him?
The trick is to make him feel like a hero in an authentic way. And there are things you can say and messages you can send to trigger this natural biological instinct.
If you want some help doing this, check out James Bauer’s excellent free video here.
I don’t often recommend videos or buy into popular new concepts in psychology, but the hero instinct is one of the most fascinating concepts I’ve come across.
4) You really listen to each other
One of the most important signs of mutual attraction is listening to each other.
You see, mutual attraction is based on communication.
If you don’t listen to your partner, you’ll likely end up not feeling as close to them.
This is because when we feel heard and seen, we feel safe, which opens up the gateway to attraction.
5) You can make each other laugh
This one relates to what I just mentioned earlier.
You see, one of the most important things in a relationship is laughter. Without it, you’re both likely to feel tense and stressed.
Laughter can help build trust and make communication easier. It can also help reduce stress and improve relationships.
If you’re looking for signs of mutual attraction, look no further! Making each other laugh is a prime example.
6) You flirt with each other
Flirting is one of the most important signs of mutual attraction.
It shows that you’re interested in each other and would like to be with the other person.
Flirting also shows that you’re open to new opportunities and that you’re willing to take risks.
The same goes for a potential partner. If you both flirt with each other, then it’s safe to assume that you’d like to spend time together!
Plus, flirting is just really fun, to be honest!
And the best part?
Through flirting, you can make yourself more attractive to the other person, as well!
My biggest tip? Have fun with it! Be playful and witty and enjoy the thrill of flirting!
7) When you’re with other people, you spend most of the time talking to one another
When you’re with other people, you spend most of the time talking to one another is another sign of mutual attraction.
Think about it: all the other people in the room aren’t as interesting as you, and vice versa.
There is no bigger sign of being attracted to one another than that.
You can’t help yourself from talking to each other, because the attraction between you two is just too strong.
And it also shows that you’re comfortable with spending time together and that you’re open to new opportunities.
Your relationship will be more intimate and meaningful because of it.
My biggest tip here?
Don’t try to force this scenario!
By this I mean, don’t try to rip the other person’s attention back to you whenever they engage in conversation with someone else.
You see, although you’re not meaning to, it will make you seem:
- over the top
And these are not things that inspire mutual attraction, trust me.
Instead, let the conversation flow naturally! And if you notice their attention happens to be on you a lot, that’s your sign!
8) You have deep and long eye contact
Another huge sign of mutual attraction is, of course, prolonged eye contact.
You’re looking at each other with a sense of warmth and connection and you seem to be trying to gauge the other person’s emotions without actually speaking.
The best part about eye contact is that it means you’re both enjoying the moment and are both comfortable in each other’s company.
Eye contact is a very intimate thing.
It’s not a coincidence that people say the eyes are the windows to the soul.
So, eye contact can really only mean one thing:
You are attracted to the other person and want to spend more time with them!
9) You find excuses to be together
Another sign of mutual attraction is when you both find excuses to spend time together.
This one might be tricky to spot but think about scenarios when the other person called or showed up because of something random that they didn’t necessarily have to come to you for.
- calling you because the dishwasher broke
- coming by to tell you something that they could have texted
- asking for something that they could ask literally any friend for
You see, when these things happen, they are usually excuses to spend time with you, which is a hallmark sign of mutual attraction!
This relates back to what I mentioned earlier: the hero instinct.
When a man is made to feel needed, wanted, and respected, he’s more likely to find an excuse to spend time with you.
And it’s as simple as knowing the right things to say to trigger his hero instinct and make him into the man he’s always wanted to be.
All of that and more is revealed in this excellent free video by James Bauer. It’s absolutely worth checking out if you’re ready to take things to the next level with your man.
10) You make an effort to make each other smile
Mutual attraction is key, but it’s not only about looking good.
You have to make each other feel good too.
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Suffering from Empty and Draining Relationships?
The legendary shaman Rudá Iandê reveals the 3 most important factors to healthy and loving relationships (and to experience them right now).
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This means making sure the other person is having a good time.
That’s why the next sign of mutual attraction is making an effort to make each other smile.
Think about it: if you don’t care about each other, you wouldn’t make an effort to make them smile, would you?
11) The body language hints at a strong attraction
Another huge sign to look out for when it comes to mutual attraction is body language.
You see, body language can say a lot more about people’s feelings than words.
What are some signs of mutual attraction in body language?
- their hips are facing you
- they mirror your movements
- they put their arm around your shoulder
- they lean in to you when they speak
- they give you a hug
- they place their hand on your lower back, shoulder, or hip
- they touch you slightly (like stroking hair out of your face or grazing your hand)
These things are usually things you only do to someone you’re attracted to, so if you notice these signs, stop worrying!
That brings me to my next point:
12) You’re both comfortable with each other’s touch and proximity
This is a clear sign of mutual attraction.
It is definitely something that shows that the two of you are comfortable with each other.
You see, being comfortable with each other’s touch means you are attracted to them.
If you think of the least attractive person you can imagine, the last thing you’d want is for them to be in your proximity, right?
So clearly, being comfortable with someone’s touch tells us that these two people are mutually attracted!
13) You can tell each other everything
The next sign of mutual attraction is when you don’t shy away from telling each other everything.
Think about it: if you don’t like someone, you wouldn’t be willing to tell them everything, would you?
You see, when you’re comfortable with someone and they’re comfortable with you and they know each other well enough to tell you everything, it means that they’re attracted to you!
This plays into trust.
Scientifically speaking, we trust people who we find attractive way more than unattractive people.
It’s messed up, but that’s usually why handsome and pretty people make the best salesmen or influencers!
Now: if you trust each other enough to tell one another everything, that means you probably find each other quite attractive!
14) You dress up to see each other
This one is fairly obvious. Dressing up to see one another is a clear sign of mutual attraction.
Well, if you don’t find someone attractive and don’t care what they think of you, you wouldn’t make an effort to look good for them, would you?
But if you find someone attractive and you like them, you’re going to want to look your best!
Think about a date, for example. Almost nobody would show up to a first date in their dirty sweatpants after having just woken up.
They want to make a good impression because they are (hopefully) attracted to their date.
So: when you dress up to see each other, it means that you’re clearly attracted to each other!
15) You remember the smallest details about one another
The next sign of mutual attraction is when you remember the smallest details about each other.
Think about it: if you don’t like someone, you wouldn’t remember anything about them, would you?
You see, when we’re not attracted to someone, we don’t pay attention to them.
But when we’re attracted to someone, we notice everything about them and remember it.
Simply put, this is the opposite of what happens when we find someone unattractive: our brains will just zone out and ignore them completely.
But when you are attracted to a person and they are attracted back to you, you’ll want to know everything there is to know about them!
16) You touch each other for no reason
Next up, we have another one related to touch.
To be fair, there are a lot of situations that warrant touch, maybe you have something in your hair, or someone is showing you where to go.
However, if you notice there is a lot of touch without any apparent reason, it’s a clear sign of mutual attraction.
Think about it: if you’re not attracted to someone, you wouldn’t touch them for no reason, would you?
If you did, it would be because you wanted something from them.
But if you find someone attractive and they like you back, then touch becomes a non-verbal way of communicating attraction.
Pretty cool, right?
Now: before you go around touching people you find attractive, make sure they reciprocate that feeling.
Circling back to earlier, there is nothing worse than someone who is not attractive to you touching you.
17) You ask friends about each other
The next sign of mutual attraction is when you ask friends about each other and try to find out more about each other’s personal lives.
This is such a huge sign because it clearly indicates interest.
If you’re not interested in someone, you wouldn’t ask their friends anything about their life!
Asking friends might also be a sign that this person really likes you but is too shy to do anything about it.
The best way to get over shyness is to be bold and ask that person out.
18) You miss each other a lot
This is a pretty straightforward sign of mutual attraction.
If you are attracted to someone, you will miss them when they’re gone.
Unfortunately, this sign can be hard to spot unless they text you: “I miss you.”.
However, you can watch out for little hints that they might be missing you right now, like:
- texting you when you haven’t talked in a while
- sending you memes throughout the day
- calling you to check up on you
All of these things will show that they really miss you!
19) You get nervous around each other
Another sign of mutual attraction is when you get nervous around the other person.
Simply put, it means that they want to make a good impression and don’t want to mess things up with you.
What other explanation than mutual attraction is there?
How can you tell when someone is nervous around you?
- they stutter a bit
- they talk really fast
- they sweat
- they shake a little
- they move really quickly
- they seem fidgety
20) They want to be alone with you
This one is simple: if someone wants to be alone with you, it means that they are attracted to you. Period.
That’s as clear as day!
You see, when you find someone attractive, your dream scenario is getting a chance to be alone with them, so if that’s the case for you, they really like you!
They might try to ask you out on a date or suggest you go outside when you’re at a party together.
Either way, they want to prioritize alone-time with you because they find you attractive.
And if the attraction is mutual – even better! Then you can enjoy the time with them even more!
What to do next?
Well, if you’ve noticed that your attraction seems to be mutual, that’s great news!
It means that sooner rather than later, you will probably move things up to the next level, which is exciting.
If you’re not sure whether the attraction is mutual, just give it a little more time.
Soon the truth will show itself to you, no doubt about it!
But if you feel like the other person is not attracted to you, you might try to find a way to change that.
So what can you do to resolve this?
Well, I mentioned the unique concept of the hero instinct earlier. It’s revolutionized the way I understand how men work in relationships.
You see, when you trigger a man’s hero instinct, all those emotional walls come down. He feels better in himself and he’ll naturally begin to associate those good feelings with you.
And it’s all down to knowing how to trigger these innate drivers that motivate men to love, commit, and protect.
So if you’re ready to take your relationship to that level, be sure to check out James Bauer’s incredible advice.
How this one revelation changed my love life
It’s Justin Brown here, the co-founder of Ideapod, and I have something to confess…
I used to believe I needed to be successful before I deserved to find someone who could love me.
I used to believe there was a “perfect person” out there and I just had to find them.
I used to believe I would finally be happy once I found “the one”.
What I now know is that these limiting beliefs were stopping me from building deep and intimate relationships with the people I was meeting. I was chasing an illusion that was leading me to loneliness.
If you want to change anything in your life, one of the most effective ways is to change your beliefs.
Unfortunately, it’s not an easy thing to do.
I’m lucky to have worked directly with the shaman Rudá Iandê in changing my beliefs about love. Doing so has changed my life forever.
Now, Rudá’s teachings can change your life, too.
As the co-founder of Ideapod, I’m in a unique position to be able to bring Rudá’s teachings to our global community.
We do this by promoting his masterclasses.
One of the most powerful masterclasses he has is the love and intimacy masterclass. In this class, Rudá breaks down his key lessons on cultivating healthy and nurturing relationships in your life.
Thousands of people have already let me know that this masterclass has changed their love lives for the better.
Justin Brown, Ideapod Founder