Recognizing when a relationship is meant to be forever is a challenging feat. You can date the same guy for months, begin to see a future together, and then — wham! It hits you like a ton of bricks that he’s just not the one.
However, there are some guys who will stay by your side no matter what life throws at you. They’re the ones who would go above and beyond to make you happy and feel loved every day.
These types of relationships don’t just come around often — but when they do, it’s worth holding onto them for as long as possible.
When it comes to recognizing these qualities in someone and knowing whether or not they’re forever material, here are 12 signs that he will never let you go (no matter what).
1) He wants to get to know the real you
There are many guys who will take you out on a romantic date, spend money on you, and ask you to be their girlfriend without even taking the time to get to know the real you.
But with a guy who’s really interested in you and wants to be with you forever, he will put forth effort into getting to know the real woman behind all of the makeup, outfits, and Instagram posts.
He won’t just be interested in getting you into bed; he will want to build an emotional connection with you.
These include the questions he asks you, what he sees as flaws, and what you find attractive.
For example, he might tell you that he loves that you’re shy and insecure at times because it makes him want to protect you — or that he loves your tattoos because they represent a specific part of your life.
2) He values honesty above all else in a relationship
Here’s the truth:
A relationship without trust is doomed. You will always be the person you were yesterday.
When it comes to a guy who really wants to be with you forever, he will value your honesty above everything else and won’t punish you for speaking the truth.
He will want and expect the same in return.
This is why he’ll be willing to ask you tough questions and get straight answers out of you — especially if he feels that there’s something wrong with you.
He will let you know that he sees what’s not working out in the relationship, and he will be sure to give you a chance to fix it rather than dating around.
3) He’s always there for you in your darkest times
Have you ever found yourself in the middle of some kind of problem — from a family fight, a death in the family, or financial issues?
Chances are that he was always there for you.
He was there to provide comfort and support, and maybe even to help you find workable solutions.
This guy is being supportive, kind, and caring all while helping you out of whatever confusing or difficult situation you might be going through.
Or if you have a bad day, he will be the one to ask you how you’re doing. He’ll want to know why your day is going so poorly, and he’ll make sure you are okay before he keeps complaining about his own crap day.
But wait, there’s more!
You can easily spot that he always brings out his inner hero in this situation. He will work to make your problem his problem, and he’ll go out of his way to show you that he’s there for you.
There’s actually a psychological term for what I’m talking about here. It’s called the ‘hero instinct’.
This concept is generating a lot of buzz at the moment as a way to explain what really drives men in relationships.
I know it might all seem kind of silly. In this day and age, women don’t need someone to rescue them. They don’t need a ‘hero’ in their lives.
But this misses the point about what the hero instinct is all about.
The hero instinct is an instinctive need that men have to step up to the plate for the woman in their lives. This is deeply rooted in male biology.
When a man genuinely feels like your everyday hero, he’ll become more loving, attentive, and committed to being in a long-term relationship with you.
But how do you trigger this instinct in him?
The trick is to make him feel like a hero in an authentic way. And there are things you can say and messages you can send to trigger this natural biological instinct.
If you want some help doing this, check out James Bauer’s excellent free video here.
I don’t often recommend videos or buy into popular new concepts in psychology, but the hero instinct is one of the most fascinating concepts I’ve come across.
Here’s a link to his unique video again.
4) He doesn’t hesitate to defend you
There’s a good chance that he put his own safety at risk to stand up for you.
Maybe you were being verbally abused in the street, or maybe someone was trying to bully your friend at work.
Whatever the case may be, he will defend you and protect you from harm. This might be a bit over-the-top or dangerous at times, but it shows that he has your back no matter what.
He might take a risk to stand up for you, but it’s never a trivial one.
5) He believes in your potential and supports your growth
Another sign that shows he will never let you go is that he believes in you and your potential.
He may even hold you to a higher standard than yourself or challenge you from time to time to live up to your true potential.
He’s not just some guy who gets stuck in his head about his own problems all the time — he’s much more interested in helping you out of the mess that life puts you into or sparking your interest in something new.
For instance, maybe you’ve always wanted to learn how to play the guitar but thought it might be too difficult for you. You’ve been too busy or too stressed out to even consider putting in the work.
But then your boyfriend/husband says, “Hey, I think you should play guitar. You’ll be really good at it, and I bet it would help you get over some of your stress at the end of the day.”
This could be a sign that he will never let you go.
It shows that he’s willing to invest in you, and it lets you know that he really wants to see you succeed. He will do whatever it takes to make sure that you get to realize your potential because he believes in you and will support your growth.
6) He’s proud of who you are
Think about this for a moment:
If you have a guy in your life who is proud of you and who admires you, he will NEVER DUMP YOU.
He will never leave you for another girl in spite of the fact that she looks better, or is more popular, or whatever superficial reason someone might use to justify cheating on you.
Why?
Because he values your character and personality as much as anything else. He’s not just into your looks and body type — he admires the person that is hidden inside of you.
According to the Gottman Institute, a relationship expert, your biggest turn-off is when someone doesn’t see the best in you.
This goes for both men and women.
So try to bring out the best in your partner. Be proud of who you are, and let him see it. You may have a lot of other things that you don’t like about yourself, but you can bet he won’t love you for not liking these things either.
7) He’ll drop everything for you without hesitation
I know the feeling of being in love so deeply with someone that you feel like you could drop everything for them.
That kind of love is so strong that he’s willing to do whatever it takes for you, no matter how much his own life gets messed up.
You can bet that he’ll be there for you even when you are in the middle of a difficult situation. For instance, if there is a death in your family, he will always make sure that everything is going okay and that you are okay before he diva-dives into his own problems again.
Pro tip:
Don’t ever make your partner feel like he has to solve your problems for you. He’ll be more likely to solve them if you show him how much he is needed by letting him know that his presence means a lot to you.
8) The thought of losing you makes him anxious
Try asking him how he’d feel if you were to break up with him.
If he can’t answer this question because of the anxiety it brings up, then you know that he will never let you go.
Losing things that are important to us makes us feel anxious. When we know that something is important to us, we don’t take it for granted. We make sure to keep it safe and secure in our minds and in our hearts forever.
We get anxious when something is threatened or when we suddenly have less of whatever it is we value or love.
So when someone listens intently to you and puts their full focus on you, this means that they really really value you. They love you, and they will never let you go.
Another scenario is that he might be very anxious when you are being in a crisis. For instance, maybe you are about to get evicted or your relationship has just fallen apart and you need help picking up the broken pieces.
In this case, his anxiety will make him want to help you out of your crisis as much as possible because he wants to make sure that you are okay. He will give up other things in his life so he can stay by your side and make sure that things work out.
9) He constantly reassures you that he’ll never leave
The thought of losing someone you care about is terrifying.
Every time you start thinking about them leaving you, all your old fears come flooding back, and it’s almost paralyzing. All the feelings of love and security, the excitement of being with them again… all those things are completely gone if they leave you.
This is why someone who doesn’t want to let you go will constantly reassure you that he won’t.
They keep repeating the same sentence, again and again, saying it over and over until it’s like a mantra in your head.
This is especially true if your circumstance is a bit complicated. For instance, maybe you have some family problems that prevent you from making long-term plans with the person you are dating.
Maybe the two of you argue and fight a lot, which makes it difficult to figure out where things stand or whether they’re going to work out between two of you. In these circumstances, he will reassure you over and over again that he hasn’t given up on where things are going.
This relates back to what I mentioned earlier: the hero instinct.
When a man is made to feel needed, wanted, and respected, he’s more likely to commit.
And it’s as simple as knowing the right things to say to trigger his hero instinct and make him into the man he’s always wanted to be.
All of that and more is revealed in this excellent free video by James Bauer. It’s absolutely worth checking out if you’re ready to take things to the next level with your man.
Here’s a link to the free video again.
10) He celebrates all of your successes, no matter how small
Let’s face it:
Getting a promotion, getting an even better job, or finding a new hobby are all things that we spend a lot of time working for. But none of these things can really be achieved without the help and support of others.
So when your man is there to celebrate these events with you, that means he is willing to commit to helping you achieve what you want in life and make your dreams become reality.
Even with the small stuff, like when you win a game of chess or you finally get around to doing something that really mattered to you — he’ll be more excited than anyone else. He’ll want to support you as much as he can because he wants to make sure that your dreams and goals are reached.
He will love watching how far you’ve come, and he will always be there for the next step.
11) He trusts you completely — and has no problem showing it
One of the signs of a man who doesn’t want to let you go is the trust he has in you. When someone trusts you completely, they have no problems letting you into their inner circle.
I mean, if they do have any problem with it at all, that means that they have some unresolved issues going on with them.
And those will most likely come out in the form of abuse in your relationship (and probably other areas of their life as well).
If they trust you, they will tell you what they need from you and the things that scare them. They will let you know how much they respect, appreciate, and love you.
And when you are around him, they will show you how much they appreciate how amazing you are. Their eyes will shine up near to their heads, and he’ll feel like he can do no wrong in your presence.
12) He has a vision of your future together
Trust me, if he has a vision of your future together, he has no problem with commitment.
When people start sharing a vision or a dream of where they see themselves in the future, they are letting you know how much they love you. They will be thinking about marriage and children, spending their life with someone who is just like you (and may want those things too).
That’s why it’s important to make sure that the man you’re dating has realistic expectations of where your relationship is going.
So take the next step:
Be honest and tell him what you’re looking for in a relationship.
If you’re not sure about the future, then be honest about that — and tell him what your vision is for your own life. He’s not going to insist that you be all set with plans right now if you don’t want that.
What he is going to want to know from you, though, is whether or not you see him in your future. This will make it easier for him to trust you and fall even more in love with you as time goes on.
Final thoughts
By now you should have a good idea of all the signs your man will never let you go (no matter what) and how to spot them.
And the best way to spot this is to pay attention to how he brings out his hero instinct. Well, I mentioned the unique concept of the hero instinct earlier. It’s revolutionized the way I understand how men work in relationships.
You see, when you trigger a man’s hero instinct, all those emotional walls come down. He feels better in himself and he’ll naturally begin to associate those good feelings with you.
And it’s all down to knowing how to trigger these innate drivers that motivate men to love, commit, and protect.
So if you’re ready to take your relationship to that level, be sure to check out James Bauer’s incredible advice.
