15 unfortunate signs your girlfriend is losing interest in you (and what to do about it)

Do you have a sneaking suspicion that your girlfriend is losing interest in you?

Perhaps you’re worried that she’s no longer interested in keeping the relationship going or pursuing a future with you.

That’s a terrible suspicion to have when you’re in a committed relationship.

But don’t worry.

We’ll help you figure out what’s going on with your girlfriend.

In this article, I’m going to go through 15 signs that your girlfriend is losing interest in you.

After that, we’ll discuss what you can do about it.

Let’s go.

1. She’s not spending as much time as she used to with you

If your girlfriend spends less time with you than she used to, then this could be a sign that she’s losing interest in you.


Because, if she was really committed to the relationship, she’d probably want to spend quality time with you.

After all:

Loving someone often means wanting to spend plenty of time with them.

That’s relationship rule 101.

And truth be told, relationships only flourish when spending enough quality time together.

So if she isn’t spending time with you as much as she used to, and not as much as you want, then it’s likely that she’s not fully invested in the relationship.

2. She doesn’t have any interest in your life

This is another huge sign that your girlfriend is losing interest in you.

If she isn’t interested in how your day went or what happened at work, then this could be a sign that she has started to lose interest in the relationship altogether.

The bottom line is this:

When you truly love someone, you automatically care about what’s happening in their life.

But if your girlfriend can’t even muster the energy to pay attention when you talk about what’s happening in your life, then something is up.

It shows that you’re not a huge priority in her life anymore.

3. There are no signs of physical attraction

Let’s get real:

Women usually have a strong physical attraction to their boyfriends because they also have a strong emotional connection to them.

So if your girlfriend is no longer attracted to you physically, then it probably means that she is no longer connected to you emotionally.

The truth is:

Physical attraction is a fundamental part of any healthy relationship.

And if your girlfriend is no longer physically attracted to you, then this is a huge warning sign that she might be losing feelings for you.

But how can you understand the signs of physical attraction?

World renowned shaman and self-development expert Rudá Iande’s free Love and Intimacy Masterclass covers all of the information you need on certain stereotypes we all carry regarding relationship dynamics,

His class will give you a better insight into what might be amiss with your connection with her.

And in understanding the fundamental principles of emotional connection, you’ll be far better equipped with the tools to deal with the situation, and avoid pushing her away by reacting poorly.

And trust me – I’ve pushed people away by jumping to conclusions and acting badly on plenty of occasions, spoiling good relationships in the process.

Rudá’s teachings demonstrate a far greater depth to the relationships we build with others, and how both emotional and physical sides come into play.

So to get started on your own journey into learning more about what’s going on inside her mind, you’ll have to work to work to both unlearn and learn some hard truths about how relationships work.

Click here to access the free masterclass and give it a go for yourself.

4. She doesn’t want to do the things that she used to enjoy doing with you

If your girlfriend no longer wants to do the things that she used to enjoy doing with you, then this is another major red flag.

For example, if you used to have fun watching Movies together all the time, but now she never finds time to watch any movie with you, then something has changed.

And not for the better.

After all:

The main enjoyment you both got out of those activities was the fact you did them together.

But now, if she has lost feelings for you, then she probably doesn’t get the same enjoyment out of those activities.

5. She’s not really showing you any interest or affection

This is another big one.

If your girlfriend isn’t showing you any genuine interest or affection, then this could be a sign that she’s losing interest in the relationship.

Because the truth is this:

When we love someone, we naturally want to express our feeling for them.

But if your girlfriend isn’t showing you any affection or interest, then it’s likely that she doesn’t feel the same way about you anymore.

If your girlfriend truly loved you, then she would let you know that she cares about you.

If you’ve had a hard day, she’d be their to listen to you.

If you hug her from behind, she’d embrace your presence and fall back to let you catch her.

But if she’s not showing you much of anything, then something has changed in her feelings for you.

6. She’s not putting in the effort to look attractive when she’s with you

If your girlfriend is losing interest in you, then she’s probably also losing interest in making sure that she looks attractive when she’s with you.


Because women like to look attractive if they have a boyfriend or husband that they love and are committed to spending the rest of their lives with.

I know, I know. Sometimes we become complacent when we’re in a long-term relationship.

But still, your long-term partner would still make an effort with their appearance when they go out on with you on a date night. She’d still want to impress you.

So if your girlfriend is losing interest in you, then it’s likely that she’s not so keen to make an effort with her appearance anymore.

She walks around in track pants, a baggy jumper and unkept hair even when she goes out in public with you.

That’s a surefire sign that she no longer cares whether she is impressing you with her appearance or not.

7. She seems disconnected or cold towards you

If your girlfriend seems disconnected or cold towards you, then it’s typically not a good sign.

This happens because:

If your girlfriend doesn’t feel connected to you, then she won’t want to make any effort to show how much she cares about you.

She’ll act cold and distant. She might even start withdrawing herself from you.

She won’t tell you how she feels. She’ll barely muster any enthusiasm when she spends with you.

This is never a good sign.

The bottom line is this:

If she’s acting cold towards you then she isn’t feeling connected to you anymore.

And if she isn’t feeling connected to you, then she is likely feeling less love for you than she used to.

8. She’s not showing interest in your future plans

If your girlfriend isn’t showing any interest in your future plans, then that’s a big warning sign.


Because a loyal girlfriend usually wants to know what the future holds for your relationship.

Are you going to buy a house? Babies? Travel overseas together?

In general, women aren’t as simple as men. They want to know what type of relationship they could build with their man.

So if your girlfriend no longer wants to know what the future holds for your relationship, then it’s clear that she might only see you as a short-term convenience fling.

9. She spends way too much time on her phone (and more than she used to)

This is a major warning sign.

If your girlfriend spends too much time on her phone, then something might be up.

Is she chatting to someone else? Why is she more interested in what’s going on in her phone than what’s going with you?

Maybe she’s drifting away from you.

Maybe she is chatting up guys on messenger apps.

Whatever it is, if it’s consistently more interesting than anything you have to say, then you’ve got to wonder.

10. She complains about your relationship all the time, especially when she’s with her friends and family

Let’s be honest:

No one wants to hear their girlfriend complain about them 24/7. It gets old really fast.

If your girlfriend constantly complains about your relationship, then she is clearly unhappy.


Because when a woman is unhappy in her relationship then she will seek out other people who will reinforce her negative feelings about the relationship.

She’ll tell them all that’s wrong with it in an attempt to convince them that she’s right and the relationship is terrible.

It shows that she’s not happy in the relationship and she’ll put you down in front of others with any chance she gets.

In a healthy relationship, you support each other. You bring each other up rather than putting each other down.

This is clearly a sign that she is losing genuine feelings for you, and your relationship is possibly toxic.

11. She tries to manipulate you

Not only is this a sign that she doesn’t have genuine feelings for you, but it’s also a sign that she may be trying to use you to get what she wants.

This is obviously a red flag. It shows that she only cares about herself and she doesn’t truly care about you.

Most men have enough self-respect not to put up with someone like that in their life.

If your girlfriend has no respect for you, then the likelihood is that she’s going to treat you poorly.

She may even threaten to leave you if you don’t do what she wants.

Again, this shows that her feelings for you aren’t genuine. She only cares about herself, not you.

12. She doesn’t want to be around your friends

If your girlfriend doesn’t want to be around your friends and family, then it’s not a good sign.


Because a woman who loves you will always want to be around your friends, family, and anyone else who loves you.

She’ll want to make a great impression. She’ll want your friends and family to like her and respect her.

She knows that these people are important to you, so even if she doesn’t enjoy spending time with your friends, she’ll still make an effort when she has to.

The bottom line is this:

If she won’t go out of her way to make a great impression with your friends and family, then it’s likely that she doesn’t care about you.

13. She’s not making any effort to get in touch with you

Now, if your girlfriend is not making a single effort to contact you, then I’m sorry to say, but she might be losing her love for you.

This happens sometimes:

Typically, it occurs when a woman is trying to distance herself from her boyfriend and cut off contact with him completely later on.

If this is the case, then obviously she’s not telling you this directly because that would be incredibly rude on her part.

But she’s indirectly trying to distance herself from you by not making any effort to contact you.

That’s not cool at all.

If you think that is might be the case, then it might be time to have an honest conversation with her.

But the truth is:

If she’s not contacting you anymore, or as frequently as she used to, then she obviously has less interest in you than she used to.

14. She makes excuses all the time

If your girlfriend is making flimsy excuses to not spend time with you, then it’s certainly not a good sign.

It means she would rather spend time with other people and do other things that don’t include you.

In other words:

You’re no longer a priority.

And that’s never a sign of a healthy relationship.

In a committed relationship, the two of you become one unit.

When a woman spends more time with her man, even if it’s to do things that she doesn’t enjoy, then it shows that she thinks you are special.

When a woman isn’t making you a priority, then this could be a warning sign that the relationship isn’t quite what it should be.

15. She’s not talking about her plans for the future

If your girlfriend isn’t talking about what she wants to do in the future, then this is a major warning sign.

It might show that she doesn’t see much point in sharing her future with you.

After all, perhaps she now assumes that you’re not going to be in it.

If you want to test it out, ask her a question about her future and see how she responds.

If she constantly uses the word “I” instead of “we” then it might show that she doesn’t see a future with you in it.

On the other hand, if she talks about things that both of you are going to do then it’s probably a good sign.

She doesn’t want to miss out on her life because of you. She wants to include you in all the fun stuff.

That’s a sign of a healthy relationship.

What to do when your girlfriend is losing feelings for you

So what can you do about it?

First, you need to start by learning more about the intricacies of attachment and dating that many of us don’t actually understand properly.

As mentioned above, Rudá’s free Love and Intimacy Masterclass covers all of the information you need.

His class will give you a better insight into what is going through her head.

And educating yourself is the best first step you can take in understanding your situation and deciding what to do next.

I’ve been there. I have felt exes slipping out of my fingers and starting flailing around in a desperate attempt to get them to stay.

Or I’ve felt the slightest hint of them withdrawing and completely shut off myself. First to get away doesn’t get hurt, right?

Needless to say, they are all exes for a reason.

But what I’ve learned through Rudá’s teachings is that panicked reactions are not the answer.

What’s more, I’ve come to learn more about myself; what I need from my partners, what I have to give in return, and when to let go of relationships that aren’t working on both sides.

Click here to access the free masterclass.

Once you have a better idea of your attachment style and whether you’re even compatible with this girl at all, go over these 5 actions you can take to rekindle the relationship with your girlfriend.

1. Have a heart-to-heart talk

The first thing you need to do is to have a heart-to-heart talk with her.

You should tell her how you feel and what it is that’s bothering you.

Make sure she knows how much you love her, but also make sure that she knows what it is that’s bothering you.

If the situation is already too far gone, then try to find out why she feels this way.

In a committed relationship, communication is a must.

It’s the only way you can make a relationship work.

You need to make sure that both of you are on the same page when it comes to your future together.

So if she doesn’t want to get make things work, then you need to find out why.

2. Make her feel special

To begin with, you need to make sure that you’re giving her plenty of attention.

If you’ve been neglecting her for a while and she’s feeling neglected, then this is perhaps why she’s lost interest in the relationship.

She needs reassurance that you still care about her and that you want to spend time with her.

So be sure to spend plenty of quality time together. Enjoy each other’s company and do nice things for each other.

3. Communicate in a non-threatening or non-needy way

In order to rekindle the relationship, you have to be sure that you’re behaving in a non-needy way.

You don’t want to come across as needy or dependent on her.

You need to let her know that you are okay without her, but also that it’s okay to spend time together.

Women aren’t attracted to needy men. They don’t want someone who needs them to survive.

On the other hand, they love men who feel like they are okay and can get by on their own but want to spend quality time with her.

Make sure you’re giving off this vibe. Have your own life and your own hobbies. Be an interesting and successful person. Don’t make your whole life about your girlfriend. Women don’t find that attractive.

4. Show her that you’re willing to compromise

If you’ve been arguing with your girlfriend, then make sure that you’re willing to compromise.

Even if it’s just for the moment. It’s not always a bad thing to show some flexibility.

In a healthy relationship, both you and your girlfriend should be able to compromise.

It’s not always about getting your own way. It’s about being there for each other and making compromises in order to enjoy each other’s company.

5. Set a date and discuss your future with her

A lot of relationships fall apart because there is no point or no reason for the relationship anymore.

So make sure you have a date with your girlfriend where you talk about the future together.

After all:

You need to be on the same page.

In a committed relationship, you need to be clear about your future together.

What do you want to achieve? Where do you want to go? What is the purpose of this relationship?

If your girlfriend isn’t willing to make a plan with you, then this might be a sign that she’s not as invested in the relationship.

So if she isn’t willing to talk about the future with you or make plans, then it might be too late for her.

Did you like my article? Like me on Facebook to see more articles like this in your feed.

Lachlan Brown

Lachlan Brown

I’m Lachlan Brown, the editor of Ideapod and founder of Hack Spirit. I love writing practical articles that help others live a mindful and better life. I have a graduate degree in Psychology and I’ve spent the last 6 years reading and studying all I can about human psychology and practical ways to hack our mindsets. If you to want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Twitter or Facebook.

Enhance your experience of Ideapod and join Tribe, our community of free thinkers and seekers.

Related articles

Most read articles

Get our articles

Ideapod news, articles, and resources, sent straight to your inbox every month.