Breakups aren’t easy.
Being in love with someone one day, and then the next day you’re expected to be alone; it can be traumatizing for some people.
And just because you break up with someone doesn’t mean the feelings go away immediately; for some, the feelings stay long after the relationship has ended.
This is why there are many people who still have feelings for their ex, even if they’ll never admit it.
But there are always ways to tell, especially when it comes to romantic feelings.
So how do you know that your ex still loves you in some way?
Here are 10 signs your ex still has feelings for you:
1) They Insist On Staying In Touch
It seems as though there’s always something to talk about, even though there’s absolutely no reason the two of you should be talking anymore.
Most exes go their separate ways after the breakup, and while some remain friends, it’s not uncommon for exes to stop talking completely or fall out of touch with their once-significant other.
From settling old affairs to random “how are yous”, your ex seems to be finding creative ways to get in touch with you despite your separation.
They seem to get in touch for just about any reason possible: how your mom is doing, what’s that nice Greek restaurant you went to once, your new address “just in case”.
There’s no other way to put it: it’s pretty obvious they can’t stop talking to you.
It’s likely that your ex is still attached and is using the conversation to feel tethered in the relationship even though that ship has already sailed.
2) They Skulk Around Your Friends and Family
They might have “moved on” from you, but they certainly haven’t moved on from your family or friends.
Every now and then you’ll hear from your loved ones telling you about your ex, and not in a, “hey I just remembered them” way but in more of a “hey they totally asked about you the other day” way.
Without much access to you, your ex is now using mutual connections to learn what’s going on in your life.
They’re hoping friends and family will spill the beans when it comes to your love life and other updates the ex is no longer privy to.
There’s also the very real possibility that they don’t even know what they’re doing in the first place.
They might be attached to your family and are having a hard time saying goodbye to people without even realizing it.
3) You Bump Into Each Other Too Often
There’s fate, and there’s also pure stalking.
Your ex probably won’t admit it but if you find them a little too often at every turn and corner, so much so that you’re starting to expect it, there’s a chance they’re orchestrating these “random” meet-ups just to see you again.
From “random” bump-ins at work to “casual” encounters at the gym or at your favorite coffee place, your ex is the perfect person to know about your daily routine and schedule. It’s no surprise they have a good idea of where to find you.
Now if you want really want to find out if your ex still has feelings for you, then you need to test your ex.
Ask a friend or try hiding from your ex in one of your usual spots.
If they turn up and they seem to be looking around for you, then you know they’re definitely there for you.
If you’re feeling even a little more adventurous, try this “Jealousy” text.
— “I think it was a great idea that we decided to start dating other people. I do just want to be friends right now!” —
Jealousy is a powerful thing; use it to your advantage. But use it wisely.
By giving your ex this text, you’re communicating to your ex that you’re actually wanted by others. We’re all attracted to people wanted by others.
By saying that you’re dating again, you’re pretty much saying that “it’s your loss!”
After sending this text they’ll begin to feel attraction for you again because of a “fear of loss”.
I learned from Brad Browning, hands down my favorite “get your ex back” online coach.
Here’s a link to his free online video. In this video, he gives a number of useful tips that you can apply immediately to get your ex back.
4) They Peacock Around You
You know your ex is happy and thriving in their life without you because, well, they won’t stop talking about it.
They either use your mutual friends as pigeons to send you the “good news” or relentlessly drop hints about the awesome life they’ve found post-breakup.
Only it’s very obvious that these announcements are very obvious attempts to try to get your attention.
You can’t seem to escape the amazing life your ex is now living because they’re just constantly telling you about it.
From obvious gloating to more subtle comments about how “they’ve found the light”, your ex is keen on spreading their wings and making a grand display about how well they’re doing… which is probably a sign of how poorly they’re actually doing in real life.
5) They Keep Referring To The Past
If you got a dollar for every time your ex said “remember that time when…”, you’d probably be a couple hundred dollars richer by now.
Your ex has a habit of traveling down memory lane and bringing you along.
From reminiscing happy memories together to reliving inside jokes, your ex probably tries to call on the past to bring themselves a sense of comfort and familiarity.
Another hint: if your ex has a tendency to compare your old relationship with your current relationships with other people, or just about any relationship in general, there’s a chance they’re holding on to that time of your lives because they want to relive it.
6) They Still Keep All Your Stuff
When you want to break up with someone, you want to forget them. And that means throwing away everything in your home that reminds of them.
The little gifts, the little trinkets and mementos; everything that came from the relationship has to go.
So what does it mean when, instead of throwing everything away, they keep everything?
It means they still care, much more than they’d like to admit.
They don’t really want to say goodbye to the relationship, and while they can’t stop you from cutting them off, they can stop themselves from throwing everything away.
7) They Try To Get Your Attention On Socials
It’s so obvious when someone tries to get your attention specifically on social media platforms, isn’t it?
They always coincidentally make posts related to your posts, just soon after you show up.
And they always “like” or say certain things that they know will turn your head; because unlike most people, they know exactly what to say to get your attention (from firsthand experience).
The truth is they hate seeing how happy and fulfilled you are in your new life that has nothing to do with them.
They still follow you because they can’t stand not knowing what’s going on with you, even though it hurts them to see you with a new person, or doing new things; be happy without them.
Social media is a curse for them, but it’s also the only way they know how to keep in contact with you.
8) They Continue Old Traditions From Your Relationship
A relationship is more than just companionship, more than just dates and regular sex.
It’s also about the bonds you form with each other and the way you impact each other’s lives.
One important way two partners impact each other’s lives is with traditions.
Those traditions, no matter how small or trivial they may be, become representative of the relationship; a physical manifestation that the relationship is real, and that your love exists.
So when you and your ex break up with each other, one of the most obvious ways to see that your ex still has feelings for you is whether or not they’re willing to let go of those old traditions.
If they’ve moved on, then those traditions are just happy memories; but if you’re still in their heart, then the traditions have remained a concrete part of their life.
Even without you, they continue all the old things you used to do together. It would just be too painful to stop.
9) They Remain Open About Their Life
You broke up with your ex weeks or months ago, but the weird thing?
You still know so much about what’s going on in their life, all because they can’t stop themselves from telling you.
When you ask them why they keep telling you about their life, they might say that they’re just trying to be friends with you, or that they have no one else to talk to.
While those are both fair reasons, more often than not they also come with another secret reason: they’re still in love with you and they want you back.
They might be in the denial stage of the break up – the inability to accept that they’ve truly lost the romantic relationship with you – and continuing to share their life with you is the easiest way to cope with that.
10) They Drunk Call or Text You
Drinking is the easiest way to lose control of your inhibitions.
Depending on your level of alcohol tolerance, all it takes is a few shots before you’re willing to do things you would never do in broad daylight (or at least, when you’re sober).
That, combined with the tendency to drink to drown out your sorrows, leads to a lot of people drunk texting and calling their ex-partners in the middle of the night.
So ask yourself – has your ex ever texted or called you after the sun’s gone down, especially on a weekend night?
Then they’re probably out drinking, either by themselves or with a group of friends.
And the fact that you’re the person on their mind when they’re too drunk to properly think really shows just how much they still care for you.
But while the tips in this article should help you figure out if your ex still has feelings for you there’s only so much you can do alone.
If you genuinely want your ex back, you need the help of a professional.
I’ve mentioned Brad Browning throughout this article – he’s the best at helping couples move past their issues and reconnect on a genuine level.
His tried and tested methods won’t just re-spark your ex’s interest in you, but they’ll also help you avoid making the same mistakes you made in the past.
So if you really want a shot at getting back together with your ex for good, check out his excellent free video below.