17 signs a girl is confused about her feelings for you (complete list)

Are you facing a situation where you are quite sure this girl is interested in you but she is still not showing signs of her feelings for you?

And you’ve been wondering how to tell if a girl is confused about her feelings for you?

Well, here it is — the ultimate list of 17 signs that she might be confused about her feelings for you!

Keep your eyes open for these and stay tuned for some more tips on how to know if she’s into you.

1) She has a habit of saying “It’s complicated” when you ask her how she feels about you

If you ask a girl how she feels about you, then she may say “It’s complicated” and change the subject instantly.

If you continue to ask her the same thing over and over again, then she might just get fed up with you and avoid your calls or hangouts.

Sometimes girls will do this because they don’t know how to say that they like someone that much.

They may not have been in a relationship with someone for a while so they have no idea what to do or which words to use.

They may also be shy on the phone but talk very freely in person.

It’s also possible that she really does like you but is afraid to say so because she doesn’t want to make a mistake.

If you do manage to get her to open up enough to tell you how she feels, then be sure not to pressure her.

2) She says she’s not looking for a relationship but tries to get to know you more

If you ask her whether she’s interested in you or not, then she might say she isn’t looking for a serious relationship.

But the second after she tells you that, she will start trying to get to know you more and even hang out with you!

This is very confusing because if she likes someone, then why would she want them around?

The only possible explanation is that girls can find it hard to admit they like someone. They would rather be friends first so they can see how things go.

3) Gets uneasy when you’re talking to other girls

A girl who is confused about her feelings for you will also notice if your conversation with another girl goes out of bounds.

It could be that she might start getting uncomfortable when you talk to other girls. If she gets jealous and starts getting suspicious, it could mean that she might not feel comfortable around you.

Maybe she will be OK with you and your friends hanging out but will get uncomfortable as soon as there is another girl in the picture.

She might even get irked at you for talking with other girls, even if they are your friends.

Believe me, this is usually a major red flag.

If you’re into a girl and you mention her to other girls, she will most likely feel insecure.

And if she becomes suspicious about your behavior with other girls, it’s a sure sign that she does not know what to do about her feelings for you.

4) Feels awkward when you’re around

If you start feeling like she’s not comfortable with your presence, it might be a sign that she has conflicting emotions about getting closer to you. It could mean she is not sure if she likes you or not.

The fact is when girls are really interested in a guy, they don’t feel awkward around him. They can talk to him without the fear of saying something wrong.

They feel relaxed and would be able to crack one-liners with ease.

On the other hand, a girl who is not into you might act aloof and feel supremely uncomfortable when she’s around you.

I’ve seen it happen with a couple of my friends. They met a girl online, she seemed to like them but felt super uncomfortable around them.

They kept chasing her for the next three months and in the end, she said she wasn’t interested in a relationship but was open to being friends.

5) The more you try to move things forward, the more she backs off

When I say back off, I don’t mean that she goes cold on you.

What happens when a girl is dating someone or interested in him is that she unconsciously starts moving back herself.

She moves away to be sure if the feeling is mutual and not one-sided.

And usually, this makes the guy chase after her more.

But if there is a real interest from the girl’s side, then she will come closer to him naturally and let him notice her signals of attraction.

This way there won’t be any tension until a relationship is established between them.

6) She asks you why you like her

A girl who is trying to figure out her feelings for you may get very defensive. She may ask you why you like her and tell you that she doesn’t like it.

I mean, what does this mean?

Is she saying that she likes someone but she doesn’t want them to know it?

Does she really want to know why you like her or is she trying to find a way not to like you anymore?

If this does happen, then just try taking it easy.

She might not have the confidence in herself to tell you how she feels about you.

7) She has changed the way she dresses around you

Sure, it is not a very specific sign that a girl will change the way she dresses around you but it can give you a hint on how she is feeling about you.

If she starts wearing really revealing clothes around you, then it could be something she believes is attractive only when guys see her in that outfit.

It could also mean that she is trying to figure out how to tell you how she feels about you or what it would look like if she gave into her feelings for you.

I’ve seen girls who were madly in love with a guy but never wore the clothes they liked around him until they actually got closer to him.

However, if she has been wearing those clothes for a while and only now you notice it, then it is most likely that she is only now opening up to the idea of getting closer to you.

8) Tries to be cool around you or acts distant

There are a lot of girls who get super nervous in front of guys they like.

They try to act cool around them, which usually leads to a lot of awkward moments.

It is not necessary that a girl who is into you would be screaming her head off or holding your hand 24/7. But, there are certain signs she would show around you that would make it clear that she likes you.

For example, if you happen to pass by the same place at the same time every day, and she starts getting really nervous and uncomfortable when you’re there, it could mean that she is not feeling comfortable around you because of the strong attraction she feels for you.

9) She avoids answering your questions

If you repeatedly ask a girl a question and she avoids answering you, then it is most likely because she doesn’t want to hurt your feelings or make you jealous.

A girl can also be shy on the phone because she may feel uncomfortable or nervous around new people.

She may also not have anything to say because of the topic you are discussing.

Maybe she understands that you are really interested in her but is afraid to reciprocate your feelings for fear of it going wrong in some way.

If you keep getting lost in a conversation without getting any answers from her, then it means that she would like answering your questions but can’t decide whether to answer them or not.

10) Finds it difficult to maintain eye contact

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Another sign that she might be confused about her feelings for you is if she finds it difficult to actually maintain eye contact with you.

A confident girl would find it easy to look you straight in the eyes, stare at you for a few seconds, and even give you a kiss on the cheek.

But, as soon as she sees your eyes wandering around her face, it is likely she gets weirded out because there is something about your gaze that does not exactly feel normal.

You might get her to look at you, but she doesn’t feel comfortable doing so, which will make her look away (although she is technically looking at you) as a definite sign she is confused about her feelings for you.

In some cases, girls will unconsciously avert their gaze from a guy they like just to avoid any awkward conversation or situation.

11) She compliments you but in an icy way that shows she’s not really invested in the compliment she just gave you

Another sign that a girl is confused about her feelings for you is when she tries to compliment you.

You might have noticed that a girl does this in a very weird way. She will try to give you a backhanded compliment.

I mean, let’s face it, you are not sure about her feelings for you too.

I’ve seen girls compliment a guy in an icy way, which is basically just saying “I like you a lot but I don’t think I like you enough to make a move.”

They show that their feelings for you are not very intense. They could be afraid the guy might reject them if they made the first move.

It doesn’t mean that the girl doesn’t like you. It simply means she’s not ready yet to act on her feelings.

A girl may be able to give up her own time, money, and emotions to be with someone she likes.

You must pay attention to these signs if you want to know how she really feels.

When a girl is unsure how to show her feelings, they can be very confusing and you might end up feeling like the odd one out.

12) She shows a lot of care for your friendship but freaks out at the thought of a romantic relationship with you

This is one very confusing sign.

Girls will be very nice in a friendship sort of way, but if you try to get them to act like they have a romantic thing going on with you, then they will freak out.

They will find it hard to say yes to exclusive hangouts and intimate conversations.

Here’s why: girls are more comfortable being friends with a guy before they start dating them because it gives them more time to think about it over and over again. That’s why they can easily spend hours hanging out with a guy or planning nice surprises for him but still be 100% confident when they say “We’re just friends” if that’s what they really want at the moment.

13) She shows a lot of physical interest but emotional distance

If a girl is physically attracted to you but has emotional distance, then it means that she likes you but she is not ready to take the next step or be in a serious relationship.

Physical attraction and emotional closeness are two separate things.

The most important thing to do here is ask her out!

But don’t just come up to her and say “Hey, let’s go out sometime.”

Be sure to make the invitation for something unique and specific enough for her to accept it.

Thoughtful gestures like surprising her with flowers with a note saying “I’m ready whenever you are” will do just fine.

14) She looks at you, smiles, and talks to you, but doesn’t let her guard down

Sometimes a girl may feel as if she is on the verge of telling you how she feels about you.

She may have even been hinting at it but has stopped herself before making a move because she is afraid of what you would say and how things will go.

Another reason why a girl might be afraid to make the first move is because she feels that her feelings are not good enough yet.

This is yet another example of why it’s important to ask her out!

You need to make the first move if you want this relationship to work.

15) She drops hints but then swiftly changes the subject when you ask her what she means

If you ask a girl how she feels about you, then it is likely that she will quickly change the subject with some “I’m not ready to tell you that” type of comment.

This could be because she doesn’t want to answer certain questions or because she doesn’t know the right answer.

It is also possible that she just isn’t ready to accept what she knows deep inside that this time is different.

Either way, it might seem really confusing and frustrating for her. It feels like you have suddenly become a topic of conversation rather than someone who is there close by listening to her talk.

16) She pretends you’re not important to her

Another sign a girl is confused about her feelings for you is she is not overtly proud of being seen with you.

A confident girl would make it a point to tell others that she’s with the guy she likes. She will insist on these conversations with other people, especially signs that the relationship is exclusive.

If you happen to talk to her, ask her how her day was or what she’s currently up to and there are no qualifying responses from her, it could mean that she has conflicting feelings about getting closer to you.

I have noticed that for some girls (especially those who are not confident), the more you hang around them, the less they talk to you.

This might be because they’re uncomfortable with you or don’t feel like they should be seen in public with you. Whenever we see them, we ask them how their day was and there’s no response.

17) Wants to get closer to you but doesn’t know how

A girl who is confused about her feelings for you wants to get closer to you but does not know what to do about it.

Therefore, whenever she talks with you, she will always want the conversation to end. She won’t want the conversation to go any further because she isn’t sure of how far she should take things with you.

The problem is that most women find that getting close to a guy they like is the hardest thing they will have to do in their lives.

It is hard to get close to a guy you are attracted to when you are not 100% sure about how he feels about you. And most women don’t feel comfortable discussing these things with anyone.

The result?

They would rather be around friendly people than with the person they like.

If you feel confused and frustrated while trying to read a girl, it might be because you actually like her but she doesn’t feel the same way about you

Wait for a while to see if she starts showing more interest in you and let her be the one to take the initiative.

You should never put yourself down because of someone else’s feelings. You can always find someone better if you keep trying.

It might just mean that she’s still getting used to dating and doesn’t know what to do or what her feelings are towards you yet.

That’s when it’s a good idea to ask her out on a date or simply ask her how she feels about you.

If she says that she’s not interested or that she doesn’t see things working out between the two of you, then it might just be best to call it quits and move on.

You may want to give other girls a chance instead of staying hung up on someone who doesn’t feel the same way about you.

It may also be because they don’t feel comfortable with being in a relationship with somebody that they don’t know very well but like spending time with.


To help you understand a girl, it’s important that you tie your reasoning into how she acts.

There’s no point in trying to figure out why a girl does something unless there are some obvious indications that point to her actions.

By looking at the signs that are within her own behaviors and actions, you’re going to be able to figure out why she does things the way she does.

I hope this guide helps you make sense of your situation so that you can get back to understanding women.

Picture of Nguyet Yen Tran

Nguyet Yen Tran

Yen is a freelance writer and a researcher specializing in mental health, self-awareness, and psychology. Her hobby is studying human behavior throughout their reaction upon situations. Be sure to check out her other posts on our blog.

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