When someone rejects you and then wants to see you or talk to you, it can feel like a back-handed compliment.
They don’t want you for a boyfriend, but they still want your company.
This can make you feel like a side piece or worse – like something that the person is ashamed of. Keep reading to find out why a girl who rejected you still wants your attention:
10 reasons the girl who rejected you still wants your attention
1) She wants to keep her options open
She may like you but be unsure if you’re really “the one”.
It could be that she hasn’t got to know you well enough yet and she’s keeping an open mind about things.
But on the other hand, she might not want to feel tied down.
There’s many reasons why she might feel this way:
- She’s just got out of a relationship and wants to observe the playing field before jumping in
- She’s had bad experiences with guys in the past
- She’s got a fear of commitment
- She hasn’t found someone she really feels connected to yet
So as you can see, there could be numerous reasons as to why she’s keeping her options open.
There’s no easy way to find out for sure, but asking the right questions might help her open up and you’ll know better where you stand with her.
2) She has more important things to worry about at the moment
Just because a girl doesn’t want to be in a relationship with you doesn’t mean she isn’t thinking about it.
We all want to find someone whom we can love and who will make us happy.
It’s just not something a girl can do right now, so she has to reject you.
Believe me:
Right now she has other responsibilities and priorities in her life, like her family or her job – or both.
If she’s turned down by you, she may be able to date other men.
But maybe she doesn’t want to date anyone right now.
She doesn’t have time for a relationship.
She knows that if she gets into a relationship it’ll surely take time away from her other responsibilities.
3) She wants to see if you miss her
If the girl who rejected you still wants your attention, there’s a chance that she wants to see if you really care about her.
She wants to see if you’re willing to do anything to be with her.
But she doesn’t want your attention too much – just enough for her to know that she can mean something to you.
This could be a good thing – if you’re really into her she’ll soon find out and can then make a decision.
On the other hand, it’s not great if she repeatedly does this to you. She could be playing games and it’d be best for you to move on if this is the case.
While this article explores the main reasons why the girl who rejected you still wants your attention, it can be helpful to speak to a relationship coach about your situation.
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4) She wants to maintain an emotional connection with you
She doesn’t want a full-blown relationship but she also doesn’t want a casual fling for now.
She wants to feel like you’re someone she knows and can rely on.
She doesn’t believe in love at first sight.
She believes there should be an emotional connection – and that it should begin with a friendship.
She’s afraid that if she dates you, she won’t have time to get to know you better.
The fact is:
- She doesn’t know you well enough to know if you could be the ultimate relationship mate.
- She needs more time.
The reason she rejected you was because she wants to take it slow, get to that deep connection, and then let things flow naturally.
So if you’re really into her, make the effort. Build that strong friendship with her. Just don’t get too comfy in the friend zone!
5) She wants to show off her attractiveness
There’s always the possibility that she wants your attention just to feel good about herself. She knows you’re into her so you’re an easy target to boost her ego.
She wants you to see how desirable she can be and how many men would want her if only they had the chance.
She wants to make a statement that she’s worth chasing, but she also doesn’t want to be with you.
Here’s a tip – the next time she asks to hang out or talk on the phone, focus on whether the conversation is all about HER or if she’s genuinely interested in you (in which case she’ll ask you questions about your day, work, etc etc).
But if the entire conversation centers around her, you know what it means…
6) She is waiting for the right guy
She wants your attention even after rejecting you because she’s still trying to suss out whether you’re right for her or not.
Here’s the thing:
There could even be a few other guys on the horizon. She may have multiple love interests.
And why not?
She’s not committed to anyone.
But maybe there’s something about you that she’s intrigued by. Maybe you’ve got a shot at being “the right guy” but she still needs time to figure this out.
7) She’s bored or lonely
This one sucks, but it happens.
Sometimes people will keep you around, demand your attention and time, even after rejecting you, just because they’re bored.
Or they want some company.
But they’re not really into you. They’re doing it to pass the time or to fill a void that they can’t fill alone.
It’s actually quite sad when you think about it, but it’s even sadder for you. If a girl only wants your attention to quench her boredom or loneliness, move on. You deserve better.
8) She wants to protect her heart from the beginning
Never underestimate the power a woman has over your heart – or the power a boy can have over a girl.
If a guy rejects a girl, she can find out exactly what he is like and if he really likes her.
She can find out what she really likes about a guy and whether he’s good enough for her.
A girl will reject you because she knows that once you get involved with her, there’s no way you’ll be able to stop.
She will reject you because she wants to protect her heart from being broken if you were to leave her one day.
When you get rejected by a girl, don’t take it too personally.
She is not rejecting you to hurt you – she’s only doing it to protect her heart. She doesn’t want to be with a guy who can break it easily and leave her by herself.
9) She thinks she’s too good for you
Unfortunately, just as with men, some women can pretty shallow too. But hey, everyone loves a bit of attention, even those among us who don’t search for a deeper connection.
They value things like looks, money, and status when choosing a partner. So even though she wants your attention, she’s surely keeping it quiet.
Trust me:
You’ll know if this is the case if she has a superior attitude toward you. She might put you down, or make remarks about how out of your league she is.
And if she never asks you to hang out with her friends or family, or only in quiet places where you won’t be seen, she’s making it clear that in her view, you’re not up to her “level”.
10) She’s changed her mind
And here’s the kicker – maybe she just changed her mind?
She might have rejected you because she was unsure of her feelings. But now she’s realized that she’s interested, and rather than outright ask you out, she’s trying to get your attention again.
So, if all the usual signs are there that she likes you, here’s your opportunity!
You have a chance of starting over with her, and maybe this time it won’t end in rejection…
What should you do if the girl who rejected you still wants your attention?
1) You can simply ignore her and forget about her
Let her be a stranger in your life.
She made her choice – so respect it for what it is.
That’s assuming you’re no longer interested in her, of course.
2) You can try again
Now she wants your attention, maybe it’s an opportunity to get to know her better and see if things progress from there?
It’s worth a shot, but don’t overdo it. Move slow, respect her wishes and let her do things on her own time.
It could be that she likes you but is dealing with a lot in life, so being there to support her will go a long way.
3) You can just let things be
Maybe she’s only testing the waters and she hasn’t made up her mind yet.
Maybe you’re not the one for her.
Your heart is always at the mercy of others because it will always be there waiting for the one who can make you feel good, even if she doesn’t realize it.
Stay away from girls who are not ready for a serious relationship, and don’t expect them to change their minds.
You need to learn how to let things go and be happy with what you have.
4) If she really doesn’t want to get into a relationship right now, then wait until she’s ready
It’s not up to you.
You can’t force her into having a relationship with you just because you have feelings for her. She has to want to get into a relationship with you.
Don’t worry about making the wrong decision – just focus on the time that she doesn’t have the “right” time for a relationship yet.
She will be back when she is ready.
You have to be patient and wait for that special time.
If you make things too complicated, you will never get her to like you.
You have to know what she’s looking for in a guy, then make yourself everything that she is looking for in a guy so that it would be easier for her to accept your feelings and feelings.
If she does not want to get into a relationship with you for the rest of your lives, then don’t keep her away from a person who would make her happy.
It’s okay to let go when you really think that she’s doing the right thing.
You have to let things happen.
You can’t force someone to like you if they don’t want it first.
Final thoughts
We’ve covered the main reason a girl wants your attention even after rejecting you, but the best way forward now is to pay attention to her actions.
Is she genuinely interested in you?
Has she changed her mind?
Or is she playing games?
Gauge as much information as you can the next few times you talk, and listen to your gut feeling. It’s good to take changes and it could end well, but you also don’t want to have your heart broken.
