When famed Icelandic singer Björk was promoting her new album last year, she said in interviews that if there was one thing the pandemic taught her, it was that she liked being alone and how much she enjoyed her own company.
While being a famous musician can be fun with the constant traveling, adventure, and glamor, Björk felt that it was also profoundly uprooting.
When the pandemic hit, Björk found that she loved hanging by herself in her little village. She would go swimming in the local pool, go hiking in the Icelandic mountains, and she did a lot of reading and listening to podcasts.
The downtime even gave Björk a burst of creativity and she created her first album in five years—her tenth one overall. The album, entitled “Fossora,” was about hunkering down and enjoying her home and her own company for the first time in a very long time.
Björk said she felt that the time she spent being introspective gave her the gift of growth and an expansion of her soul.
Do you feel the same way? Did you discover an introspective side to your personality during the pandemic?
Or maybe you’ve always been someone who genuinely enjoys being alone. If you have these ten personality traits, you might just be a bonafide loner like Björk.
1) They don’t loathe being by their lonesome
People who genuinely enjoy being alone don’t associate a negative connotation to the word “loner.”
They know that loner is just another word for introvert—a label they’ll wear with pleasure.
Introverts love spending time alone—it’s not necessarily because they don’t like to be around other people. They just tend to be preoccupied with their own innermost thoughts and feelings.
Spending time alone also helps them to recharge their energy. They like to nurture themselves and spend a lot of time on self-care.
It also helps them to process the experiences they have with other people, according to experts.
Introverts not only enjoy—but need to be on their own so much that without an adequate amount of alone time, they can actually become irritable, become fatigued, have poor sleep, and have difficulty concentrating.
2) Superficial social gatherings make them gag
Those who genuinely enjoy being alone sometimes can’t stomach the idea of small talk.
This is especially true when the “conversation” revolves around how much money someone is making or what luxury resort their next vacation is going to be.
If you love being alone, all you can think about during this “discussion,” is the book waiting for you at home and the wine you’re going to be pouring so as to forget why you accepted this invitation to begin with.
It’s not that introverts are antisocial, like all human beings, even those who love their own company most of all need social relationships. But introverts are very selective when it comes to creating social contacts. They also need more time alone to balance out their energy after social situations because they can get more over-stimulated and even overwhelmed.
3) They’re highly-independent
This doesn’t mean that people who prefer spending time alone aren’t avid travelers.
On the contrary, introverts make the most curious of travelers: they’re all about immersing themselves into the culture of a country so as to really experience it.
They have no problem dining alone and taking public transit. Anything they don’t know, they know they rely on their own devices to figure it out. If anything, they see potential hurdles as a challenge and adventure.
Introvert Dear, an award-winning online community for introverts, says that introverts are more independent and need less supervision when it comes to work.
“Many extroverts insist on teamwork and being a team player, an attitude common to both modern corporate life and the classroom. Because introverts are more private, they’re inclined to cultivate a lifestyle that maximizes autonomy and self-sufficiency.”
4) They actually do take the initiative on things
People who love being on their own are generally self-starters. They’re the writers, artists, and scientists of the world. In other words, they’re naturally born creative types who don’t have a list of rules to follow. They like to fly by the seat of their pants.
Even if they’re not in a creative field per se, they’re the people who like to start conversations with strangers, whether they’re on the train, plane, or in a new country.
At work, introverts are pretty confident working alone because of their independence. They actually need less supervision than extroverts and they’re perfectly content working on their own. They’re capable and reliable.
5) They like to take their sweet time
Someone who likes to be alone doesn’t like to be rushed. They don’t like to be on anyone else’s schedule—another reason why they often pursue careers as writers, artists, and entrepreneurs where they can make their own hours.
They feel like life is meant to be enjoyed by going with the flow—quite honestly their flow.
This doesn’t mean that they’re lazy by any means. They’re more than happy to burn the midnight oil if they can enjoy a clear, crisp day by hiking on their own in the woods first.
Introverts move to their own rhythm, because any other way is too stressful and totally unnecessary.
6) To them, time is always of the essence
Introverts value time, so when they work, they work hard. They don’t want work (even if it is their passion) to spill over into their “me-time.” They have so many other passions to pursue.
People who love being on their own don’t like to waste time either. Rather than spending all of their lonesome time in front of the television, they tend to plan their downtime just as much as they do when they’re on the clock.
They take their “unwinding” very seriously.
7) They’re self-reliant—even self-serving (but in a good way)
Introverts are pretty self-reliant not just because they have to be, but also because they want to be.
Nothing gives them more pleasure than having a 401K plan, investing for their retirement, making sound investments, and having enough money set aside for a rainy day.
They make sure to save for travel and other self-evolving but also fun and fanciful pursuits. They have a lot of pride and don’t want to have to rely on others if they don’t absolutely have to.
8) They have deep thoughts
No doubt people who genuinely enjoy being alone are deep thinkers. They love contemplating life—particularly when it comes to their own evolution.
Their only competition is themselves and they always like to reflect on if the person they are today is better than they were say, a year ago.
They also like to reflect on the state of the world and think about their part in making the world a better place.
When it comes to their emotions, introverts often ponder on what is happening deep within the psyche. For example, they may reflect on why they had the dream they did and the deeper meaning behind it.
They may also probe their psyche on why a certain memory is coming up a lot, for example.
Is there something in their past that they have been avoiding? What triggered the memory? Is there something they still need to work through perhaps?
9) They have unbreakable boundaries
People who like being on their own have a healthy set of boundaries partly because they value their own time so much.
They are very discerning when accepting invitations, for instance. If the event is meaningful to them personally, they’ll accept. Otherwise, they have no problem politely declining a co-worker’s housewarming party.
Many might think of introverts as pushovers but nothing could be further from the truth. They are very selective about the people they allow into their inner circle and they will only participate in something that aligns with their own values and desires.
10) They avoid drama like the plague
It should come as no surprise then, that people who genuinely enjoy being alone can’t stand any kind of drama.
They see drama as something that is a stealer of inner peace and it is totally unnecessary. They believe that any kind of problem or issue can be talked about and resolved in a clear, calm, and rational manner.
Introverts believe that life is too short to be tied up with toxic people. They feel that drama serves no purpose other than to drag you down, and who needs that?
Not an introvert who would much rather be lost in their own thoughts, that’s for sure.
11) They cherish meaningful relationships
While introverts may have fewer social interactions, the relationships they do form are deep and meaningful. Because they place such a high value on their own time and space, when they choose to share it with someone, it’s a genuine investment.
They thrive in one-on-one settings where they can engage in profound conversations and develop genuine connections.
This is not to say that introverts can’t enjoy group settings; they simply prefer interactions where they can truly connect and engage on a deeper level.
In relationships, they are typically very loyal and value partners who understand and respect their need for solitude.
12) They’re often intuitive and empathetic
Many people who enjoy their solitude have a heightened sense of intuition.
This ability to deeply tune into their own feelings often translates to being highly in tune with others’ emotions as well. They can be exceptional listeners, and their reflective nature allows them to provide thoughtful responses and advice.
Their empathetic nature can sometimes be a double-edged sword, as they can easily absorb the emotions and energy of those around them.
This can be overwhelming, especially in negative or emotionally charged environments, which is another reason they might retreat to solitude to recharge and realign.
Their intuitive and empathetic nature makes them great friends, partners, and confidants, as they can offer unique insights and perspectives.
Bottom line: It could be chemical
According to Dr. Marti Olsen Laney—who wrote the 2002 book, The Introvert Advantage—says that introverts may enjoy spending time alone in part because of something called acetylcholine. Acetylcholine is an organic compound that functions in the brain and body of many types of animals as a neurotransmitter.
Introverts may enjoy spending time alone in part because of acetylcholine, Laney says.
The chemical may produce a happy feeling for introverts when they do an activity that focuses them inward, such as quietly reflecting or enjoying a hobby like reading, painting, or gaming.”
A research study suggests that highly intelligent people enjoy being alone
There was recently a research study published that suggested highly intelligent people enjoy being alone.
While the research was interesting, it was even more fascinating to dive deeper into what it all really means, as Justin Brown did in his video below.