15 things you need to know about dating an overthinker (complete list)

Overthinking is a weird thing. It can be as crippling as a debilitating disease or, if dealt with properly, it can actually motivate you to do great things and think outside the box.

On the other hand, if you tend to overthink too much and never get anything done, then what would happen?

That’s where this list comes in handy – we’ve got advice on how to find peace in your life and make dating an overthinker possible.

So, without further ado, here are 15 things you should know if you are dating an overthinker!

1) Overthinkers don’t just overthink. They analyze and over-analyze everything.

Believe it or not, overthinkers don’t just have racing minds, but they also go in-depth about everything and are able to see through all the shows that anyone tries to throw.

They are skeptical and always have reasons for believing that what they think is the truth.

Overthinkers are very critical of themselves and others. This can be frustrating for them as well as for others around them.

Once an overthinker makes up their mind about something or someone, it’s hard to change it because they will always try to find the negative things in a relationship or any situation they face.

They will always look at worst-case scenarios and over-emphasize the bad aspects of things instead of focusing on the good ones.

2) They know how to solve problems, but they also know how to make them.

Make no mistake about it, overthinkers are not angels. Their overthinking can lead to problems because the vast majority of people will be left surprised by the things overthinkers notice.

If you are dating one, you will probably be thrilled at first to hear more about your partner’s thinking process.

However, after a while, you may just end up seeking some peace and quiet.

Overthinking can be both a blessing and a curse.

On the one hand, it gives overthinkers the ability to face their problems and overcome them, but it also makes overthinkers more sensitive to criticism and makes them carefully pick apart every single part of their personality that they consider “flawed”.

3) Don’t fall for their smooth-talking – they can make anyone believe anything, even if it makes no sense at all.

There is no doubt that overthinkers are smart.

They are forward and confident in their own opinions – that’s one of the great things about them.

However, there is always a point when they say what they want to say, but they can sometimes have trouble getting to the point they were trying to make.

Overthinkers know how to make things easier for themselves and make people think that they are doing a good thing by helping them solve problems.

They know how to look like a good person, but in reality, behind it all, many overthinkers are just using people like tools.

4) They can be the most attractive people you have ever met, but they are not always the smartest.

Overthinkers can be the most logically minded people.

However, this doesn’t mean that they always use logic in the best way possible or at the best time.

They are still human, and it is normal for them to make mistakes.

You just have to be willing and ready to help your partner understand that they have made a mistake, and help them to fix it.

5) They have an inner voice that tells them what to do and how to do it, even if it makes no sense and is completely irrational.

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This is one of the essential things that you should keep in mind about an overthinker – their mind makes them do all these things and question everything.

It’s not always easy for an overthinker, but be aware that questioning every little thing may make your life more complicated than it actually is because as soon as you start asking questions, you need to get answers.

If you cannot explain yourself, things can become a complete nightmare when overthinkers are involved.

6) They always seem to get somewhere with their ideas, so don’t let them discourage you from thinking outside the box!

When it comes to dealing with overthinkers, it is always important to know that they are driven.

They have their own set of rituals, patterns, and ways that they can get something done.

You should never discourage them from thinking outside the box. Instead, try to understand how their mind works and be patient with them when they are having a tough time getting a topic figured out.

7) Your overthinker might want both of you to commit, but he or she may have trouble with it.

When everyone is pairing off according to their needs, preferences, and desires, it’s the overthinker who comes up short.

They might have the desire to have a partner, but they might also want freedom and independence at the same time.

In other words, they can’t commit to one person – because commitment is not something that overthinkers are good at. Why is this the case?

Because they are suspicious of anything that looks like a commitment, they just end up walking away.

Their desires and needs are always changing and taking turns at the front of the line.

8) They have great intuition, which makes them very aware of the feelings of others.

Good luck managing to trick the overthinker. Their intuition often works overtime, so they always know when they are being manipulated.

Overthinkers are not as easy to persuade compared to other types of people in the world.

This can be frustrating for everyone involved, but their intuition helps them sense when someone is not being honest with them.

As a result of this, the overthinker will often doubt the intentions of those around him or her and find it difficult to trust people.

9) They are a dream to be with, but they can be a nightmare to live with.

Human beings are constantly growing and changing. Overthinkers are no exception.

They might start off being a great partner but gradually begin to lose their patience as they grow older.

They are always changing, they never stick around for too long, and they often don’t know when to leave.

That means that a quick relationship is not always the right move for overthinkers – it might only be leading to heartache.

10) If you want to know what an overthinker is afraid of, just ask them and listen – because they will tell you exactly what it is that scares them more than anything else!

Overthinkers will constantly question you, especially about their own life.

This is because they are trying to figure out what is right for them.

They are usually the ones who have a hard time figuring out what they really want, and so they get caught up in the feeling of uncertainty.

Leading an overthinker to success is not always an easy task, but it’s not impossible either.

You just have to be willing to work together on overcoming the challenges that might arise.

Overthinking is a personality trait and a natural capacity of the human mind.

The real challenge isn’t overthinking itself – it’s how we choose to deal with it.

11) Overthinkers are very creative people, and when the situation requires creativity, watch out! They go wild!

When they are involved in a project that requires creativity, then everything happens on overdrive.

They will get so into the process that they won’t be able to stop thinking about how to figure out the solutions for everything.

They may not always do well with time management or structure, but their creativity is what makes them so invaluable.

12) Don’t get jealous when your overthinker starts a new project and forgets all about you.

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Overthinkers are very intense and good at turning their mind over to something else when they’re not busy with a project.

As a result, they often get very involved in something new that is important to them.

So, if they’re busy on a project, don’t worry about them because it’s usually because they want to make a difference in the world.

You might need to decide if you should try and convince them to hang out more or accept their behavior as the way things usually are between the two of you.

13) They like to assume things, but they also like to test the waters.

Overthinkers are usually very good at assuming things and making decisions without testing them.

This can be both a good and a bad thing.

They are very driven to go beyond the limits by checking what could happen if they assumed this or that, but they also tend to make big assumptions based on emotional factors when it comes to making a decision.

In other words, they can get themselves into trouble with their assumptions. However, this doesn’t mean that you should try to talk them out of their gut feelings.

This can be a very frustrating experience for the overthinker, but they will eventually get better with time.

Usually, they will rise to the challenge and come out of it a much better person.

Overthinkers will do anything to make sense of the world around them, including going overboard with their theories.

They love to make a plan for everything and make assumptions about how things will go based on their theories alone.

This might seem like an easy thing for someone to do, but it can get pretty crazy after a while.

14) Be sure not to ask them if they are overthinking – but you can ask them what they are thinking about.

The overthinkers are always thinking about something.

They like to think about the past, present, or future. They also enjoy doing some abstract thinking, but they are always doing something in their heads.

So, if you want to know what is on the mind of an overthinker, then don’t ask them if they are overthinking, just ask them what they’re thinking about!

Think about it like this – mentioning their overthinking will just make their mind explode with questions, and it will touch their self-esteem, which will lead to many other discussions.

The reason why this happens is that they might perceive your question as an accusation that they are doing something wrong, and this is certainly something you should avoid unless you want to have their thoughts pouring all over you!

15) Most importantly, know that an overthinker is someone who cares about you more than anything else in the world!

Even though an overthinker may have issues with committing, it doesn’t mean that they can’t love.

Overthinkers don’t always have their priorities straight, but they are not cold people.

That is a myth!

They care about others, and they care about what’s going to happen.

This may be a problem sometimes, but don’t worry – an overthinker will eventually get better at showing affection.

The main issue with committing and caring is the fact that they will always doubt things and wonder if your relationship is genuine and honest.

If you manage to get past the walls that this person has built up, you will be able to experience the wonderful person that lies within.

And the good news is that you can count on an overthinker to always let you know what’s on their mind, so there will be no surprises!

Remember: overthinkers are thinkers who overdo it and then readjust things into perfection.

The key is not to judge them and learn how to deal with them.

Once you figure out the way your partner’s brain works, you will be able to have a better experience in your relationship.

Perhaps this article can help you out, but if things are getting worse, then you will have to find someone who can talk to your overthinker and make them understand that they need to work on their issues.

An over-thinker may ask for advice from their friends or family, but for the most part, they will want someone who is not directly involved in the situation.

Final thoughts

Being in love with an overthinker will make you wonder what you could do to improve yourself and your way of functioning.

When it comes to relationships, you might be surprised to hear that there’s one very important connection you’ve probably been overlooking: the relationship you have with yourself.

I learnt about this from the shaman Rudá Iandê. In his incredible, free video on cultivating healthy relationships, he gives you the tools to plant yourself at the center of your world.

And once you start doing that, there’s no telling how much happiness and fulfillment you can find within yourself and with your relationships.

So, what makes Rudá’s advice so life-changing?

Well, he uses techniques derived from ancient shamanic teachings, but he puts his own modern-day twist on them. He may be a shaman, but he’s experienced the same problems in love as you and I have.

And using this combination, he’s identified the areas where most of us go wrong in our relationships.

So if you’re tired of your relationships never working out, of feeling undervalued, unappreciated, or unloved, this free video will give you some amazing techniques to change your love life around.

Make the change today and cultivate the love and respect you know you deserve.

Click here to watch the free video.

Picture of Azra Jovicic

Azra Jovicic

I am Azra Jovicic and I love writing about psychology and wellness. I am just trying to make the sense of the world and share with others the things I’ve found out.

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