We all do it. We get overwhelmed and angry for no reason.
Sometimes we just want to scream and shout, but then we feel guilty about it afterwards.
I know that at the time, it feels like it will last forever. You may feel like nothing is going to fix your situation or make you feel better, but at the same time, you do want something to change.
But the truth is, sometimes when you’re feeling horribly overwhelmed, the reasons behind it can be hard to identify.
So, are you looking for some encouragement and hope? Then, here are 15 reasons why you get overwhelmed and angry and how you can deal with it.
15 reasons why you get overwhelmed and angry
1) You feel like you’re not good enough
Have you ever found yourself feeling angry and frustrated because of something you’ve done or said?
Or how about something that someone else has done or said?
Then, it’s easy to feel like you’re not good enough.
Maybe you feel like you don’t have enough money or skills to get the job you want. Or maybe you’ve been rejected again for a job, and now you’re feeling really down about it.
Does this sound familiar?
If this is the case, then it’s important to remember that there are a million other people out there who are feeling exactly the same way as you do right now.
It’s okay to feel down sometimes, and it’s okay to express anger.
But it’s also okay if you want to stop feeling so down and angry all of a sudden because one person isn’t going to hire you or give your dream job away.
Why do I say this? Well, when you’re feeling this way, it’s a sign that you don’t feel good enough.
And when you don’t feel good enough, things won’t go well for you.
2) You’re living in a negative world
Let me take a wild guess – you think that the world is a negative place. And maybe you even have enough proof of it.
- Do people act selfishly around you?
- Do they ignore you?
- Do they just lie to you?
- Don’t they unfairly make money from each other?
I know the feeling, and deep down, everyone knows that our world has become a slightly more negative place than before.
In our modern world, it’s easy to get caught up in the media. The media always tells us that life is hard and that we need to be happy all the time.
But you know what? Sometimes life isn’t like that. Sometimes it’s okay to feel sad and angry, even if the world around you is a negative place.
You probably think that people are all selfish and out to get you. Or maybe you think that the world is full of liars and cheats.
You may even believe that the world is full of bad things happening to good people.
But what if I told you that this isn’t true?
What if I told you that everyone has their own story, and everyone has their own point of view? And what if I told you that sometimes things are hard because they aren’t going well for everyone?
Whenever we feel like the world is a negative place, it’s easy to feel angry and frustrated about it. But when we start seeing how positive everything can be much better. And we can eventually enjoy our lives.
It’s true that you can be angry because of all the things you see and hear on TV, in the movies, or books.
But if you want to get better, the world has to start being a little fairer. And when it doesn’t start being fairer, then it is a sign of how unfair things are in your life right now.
Good news: as soon as we understand how out of balance the world is, and we begin to feel happy about it instead of upset by it, it’s a sign that we begin searching for balance ourselves. Which means what?
You can no longer feel angry or overwhelmed when things go wrong.
3) You’re unable to think logically about what is happening to us
What happens when things don’t go well? You feel angry, you scream, and yell. But what happened before you exploded?
If you notice that you can’t even remember what made you so angry, then maybe you’re unable to think logically and consider things happening around you rationally.
Along with feeling angry and frustrated, if that still doesn’t help, you feel distressed. Distress means you feel awful and upset over everything happening around you. And then, when all else fails, things go crazy…
But, is distressing driving you crazy and leaving you feeling terrible? Think about it!
Think about all the negative things you feel that are totally out of your control. Why? Because thinking about our negative emotions is a way of dealing with them.
Believe it or not, the only true reward is freedom or peace. Not a great job or money. They don’t make traffic go faster, they can’t solve homelessness and hunger issues or keep our food clean and safe to eat when there’s no water or electricity; none of these are my favorite things to do either!
So when these things that “can’t be helped” happen, who else feels stressed out as a result? You, and you alone.
4) You’re easily taken aback
Have any of us ever seen a dog that we love running away from 3 or 4 humans snatching at it?
If you could run after them and stop them, wouldn’t all of this terrifying running, pulling, and grabbing be for fun?
Turns out dogs do this so often, over and over again, because dogs don’t know how to understand what is scary.
Now you probably wonder why I’m discussing this strange example.
In fact, the way our brains are wired means we know how to deal with physical threats like hunger, bad weather, falling trees, the roof needs repairs, someone swipes your stuff, or somebody cuts us off in traffic.
However, the majority of the physical threats we face on a daily basis are one-time events.
But what about the other ones?
The ones where you don’t know what’s going on or the consequences of an action you take.
What happens when you’re trying to solve a problem, and it isn’t helping? You may feel angry, frustrated, and upset over the fact that your efforts are not working.
If your efforts are not working, then they aren’t helping! Isn’t this obvious?
How long will it take until we figure this out? When I was in school I had a teacher who said – “If you can’t explain it simply, you don’t understand it well enough.” I hope we can all agree that learning is not about memorizing facts but understanding the purpose for which we learn them.
5) You have unrealistic expectations for everything in life
Did you know that having higher expectations usually leads to stress and anxiety?
In fact, that’s what psychologists prove. Or even more. That’s the exact reason why people reach out to mental health professionals so frequently.
But you don’t want to have to deal with anxiety, right?
That’s why you should reconsider your expectations.
Think about it. Is it possible to meet all the crazy expectations that our society has?
Personally, I don’t think so.
Still, having higher expectations is just part of human nature to be inspired and take action towards those goals in life. Just say no to negative signals and do the things that make others happy.
And don’t focus on those “forgetting” or embarrassing moments over rollercoaster reactions, even though they could be viewed as lame and eventually evaporate depending on the situation at hand.
6) You can’t handle it when people don’t do what you want
You adore telling people what to do. But you get frustrated when they don’t.
Most of us have felt it. And personally, I often feel the same way. Why does this happen?
The reason might be trouble controlling your anger. Or maybe, you’re just in a bad emotional state and project your negative emotions onto others.
Put it another way: won’t you mind being told what to do?
You probably would. And you’d probably get even angrier than you are right now. Why?
Because deep down, you want others to do what you want. And no, it’s not a sign of a manipulative person-at least most of the time. But it’s just inherent in humans!
So listen up, people! We must learn to be better at listening to, observing, and controlling our aggression in this constant battle against homicidal maniacs who hurt us every minute.
The solution is simple: approach other people differently instead of trying to shove yourself in their way. Try to understand that, just like you, every person is an individual.
And everyone has their own needs and preferences. Nobody’s supposed to behave the way you want them to.
7) You’re in a bad mood in general
You just can’t seem to always be in a good mood.
Can you relate to that at all? I know most do, but it may not be because of body image or enduring depression, which are two other causes of negative feelings. The truth is that seeing a negative view in the mirror exaggerates it and makes you feel angry.
Sometimes we’re in a bad mood because of circumstances outside our control.
It’s like if we’ve been studying for hours or if we’ve been dealing with family drama.
So how do you handle such things? Do try not to take life as “one big test”. The best things to do when you’re in a bad mood are conscious breathing, grounding exercises, and yoga.
8) You’re exhausted
Just stop right there and ask yourself: when was the last time you properly slept?
A week ago? A month ago? Or maybe you can’t even remember.
Believe it or not, it’s somehow related to your anger. When you’re exhausted, you experience stress, and you think you’ll never manage to get through your everyday tasks. And that might even lead to burnout (which you need to prevent).
Even if you do get through it, what’s the point? All you’ve accomplished is to thrash yourself with fatigue and frustration.
Does it sound familiar?
And what’s the result of this? The short answer is someone is doing things because they feel lazy and apathetic instead of reaching goals and taking action that could change their lives.
Subconsciously, you want to be able to “fake faith in yourself” that everything can be done miraculously.
You know what to do, though. Good night!
9) You can’t keep track of time
It takes all your willpower to finish your basic tasks, but some days a “switching off” reflex comes super, supernaturally.
No one’s saying things like: “Hey, you’re about to lose track of time for the next 100 years!” But eventually, a long time passes without any need for attention, which makes you feel as though you wasted that time.
You don’t remember how long it takes to make one YouTube video, how long it takes to write a few paragraphs, or how long it takes to take a shower in the morning. 25 minutes before leaving home so you can save just the right amount of energy to enter your workplace?
That should be something that’s on your daily agenda!! Otherwise, remember how teenagers usually behave? They lose track of time during their free time and get embarrassed when friends walk in while they’re playing video games all day at home.
Why does that have to be so hard for us? It wouldn’t if we’d just woken up and gone, like everyone else!
10) Everything is urgent and it’s starting to consume your life
You’re in a constant hurry. You wake up, rush through your morning routine, and fill your stomach with head-first pasta to nourish your body.
After that, you run out the door before you realize what happened, and you’re already in slow-paced traffic on the way to work.
It seems that every second counts, even minutes count, such as during public transport intermissions or in your workplace.
And guess what?
At the end of the day, you get so overwhelmed and angry that you don’t even know what or who you’re angry about.
The simple truth is that you’re wasting your time waiting for the bread to be toasted at a nearby bakery, instead of enjoying the fresh dough. You get that, right?
Well then, you’ll love this advice — don’t let anything consume your life. However urgent it might seem, you shouldn’t let anything stand in your way if you want to get by.
11) You’re unable to think logically about what is happening
Have you ever been at home and suddenly decided to go to the grocery store, allowing yourself that half hour or so before you had had enough of reading the old newspapers or the latest copy of New Scientist?
But most opportunities always seem to come too slowly, coupled with how alarmed you get by all the stuff that has happened so often lately, it ends up going through your mind bit by bit in all directions.
You take one step further and you already find yourself in their potential safety zone.
Fact: worrying about everything doesn’t get us what we want, and when it comes to it, we worry more.
Instead, you should take a deep breath and try to be more rational. And once you sort out everything, chances are high you’ll feel less overwhelmed and a lot happier
12) You’re feeling down because of something that happened in the past
Maybe someone hurt you and now you feel angry about it for no reason at all.
Or maybe something happened in your past and now you feel angry about it for no reason at all.
If this is the case, then remember how much better life feels when you’re not feeling upset or angry about things anymore.
When you’re feeling down because of something that happened in the past, you should try to imagine what it would have been like if it hadn’t happened.
For example: if someone had died, or if you had not been born.
Try to imagine your life without that person in it and how you would have been different if it had not happened.
You would have been different and you might have had a different life.
But then again, maybe you would not have had that person in your life.
13) You feel like no one understands your problems
You might be having a hard time accepting the fact that most people don’t really care about what’s going on in your life. And sometimes, you ever feel like nobody likes you.
But you’re wrong.
The truth is that most people in your life care deeply about what happens in your life, and they will try their best to help you if they can, even if that means telling you off or just not talking to you for a little while.
The people that you actually care about will understand, and they will try to help you if they can.
If you don’t believe me, ask them.
14) You’re always on edge about what’s going on around you
Let me guess: you’re a very sensitive person and easily hurt by small things.
You can’t stand the thought of something happening to someone else, or you just feel like there’s a chance that something will happen, and it might seem like you’re overreacting or exaggerating, but in reality, it’s not that far off from the truth.
In fact, chances are high that this is not the case and it is just something that has happened over time through life experiences.
If this is the case, then try to remember how much better it feels when everything around you is fine, no matter how small or big things happen.
The problem arises when you let your mind wander into what-if scenarios because of all the things that are going on around you.
If this is something that happens to you a lot, then try to control your thoughts, stop overthinking and try to be more rational.
15) Your brain sees everything as a threat
Are you in a constant state of worry?
Are you always paranoid, thinking that something bad might happen?
Do you see everything as a threat and think that something bad might happen?
If so, don’t worry because we’ve all been there: you’re in a meeting, or driving in traffic, or waiting at the doctor’s office, when suddenly your blood starts to boil. You can’t stand it anymore! You feel trapped. And suddenly, your brain perceives this negative feeling as a threat.
And you get angry.
This can be a problem, but it’s not always the case.
Sometimes you have to worry about things, but you have to be careful because it’s easy to overreact.
The best way to deal with this is by learning to accept whatever comes your way and learning how to deal with situations calmly.
5 Tips to control your anger
This is the point where I’m going to remind you that no one’s perfect.
Still, if these reactions are happening more often than not, it’s time to take a closer look at your life – where are you getting stuck?
Here are 5 tips for making anger less overwhelming, from calming yourself down in a tough moment to building healthy habits that will help prevent future outbursts. Let’s get started!
1) Accept what’s happening to you
There’s no point in being angry at someone you can’t control.
And it’s important to know that you can’t control everything, which is why you need to accept that this person does what they do, and that’s okay.
The key is to accept what you can’t change.
2) Look for the good in any situation
Even if it appears unlikely that it will happen again, it’s hard not to get upset when someone does something mean or rude, but take a step back and think if there are any positive aspects to the situation.
Maybe they were just having a bad day and wanted to get out of their heads by talking with you.
Try to look good in any situation and even if you don’t notice anything positive for now, don’t worry, because as time goes by, you’ll get used to doing so.
3) Try not to let your mind go into overdrive
Sometimes we let our minds work very hard and think about all the things that happen around us at the same time.
But if you didn’t know before, it’s worthless.
It’s easy to think about what might happen, but it’s not always a good idea.
Instead, try to focus on the present and see what you can do to make things better.
4) Don’t try to be perfect
Did you know that perfectionism might actually damage your self-esteem? And also, perfectionism has the power to trigger aggression.
Therefore, don’t get too caught up in trying to be perfect, because as soon as you do, you might end up getting angry at yourself.
It’s a good idea to try to be nice and do the right thing, but don’t let yourself get too caught up in it.
Realize that you’re not perfect, and that’s okay.
5) If you can, try not to let your anger get the best of you
If you feel like you’re about to get angry, try and take a few deep breaths and count to 10. Why? Because that way, you can calm down, and it’s easier to think about what you can do in a more rational way.
It’s also important to realize that anger is usually a symptom of other issues, so if you’re not happy with something in your life, try talking to someone about it.
Still, if you can’t control yourself, then that’s okay – just don’t let your anger get the best of you.
Feeling overwhelmed and angry doesn’t just happen to you, it also happens to all of us. Our emotions can overwhelm our rational thinking and our ability to manage our behaviors.
But whenever you feel this way, remember that it’s okay to be angry. And it’s also okay to feel overwhelmed sometimes.
However, don’t stop trying to figure out the reason behind finding peace in the midst of the chaos and overcoming feelings of anger, overwhelm, and frustration once and for all!