9 ways to be more assertive without coming off as rude


1. Use “I” statements

Use "I" statements as one of the best ways to communicate effectively without appearing rude, such as using phrases like "I would appreciate it" or "I disagree with that statement because". 

2. Learn to say “no”

Assert your right to choose by saying "no" without feeling the need to explain yourself, as it is not rude to exercise this right. 

3. Be clear

Avoid vagueness and be specific in your statements to avoid misunderstandings and effectively communicate your needs and disagreements in a non-rude, assertive manner. 

4. Try not to get emotional

Remain composed and in control of your own reaction, even if you can't control the other person's response, by delivering your message clearly in a calm tone to express your opinion and ensure you don't come off as rude. 

5. Write down what you want to say

To become more accustomed to being assertive, consider writing down and practicing what you want to say, either through self-reflection or role-playing with a friend, to maintain focus and ensure effective communication. 

6. Start with something small

If you are hesitant to come off as rude or upset when being assertive, start small by practicing on less significant tasks such as choosing your preferred meat cut, before progressing to more significant issues. 

7. Don’t forget body language

Maximize your chances of assertiveness success by ensuring that your body language exudes confidence, such as standing up straight, maintaining eye contact, avoiding closed-off postures, and being aware of your facial expressions. 

8. Acknowledge the other person’s opinion

Before expressing your opposing viewpoint, show understanding and acknowledgement of the other person's perspective by truly listening to their opinion first to prevent negative reactions and ensure that they feel heard. 

9. Don’t take things personally

Remember that you cannot control others' reactions to your assertiveness, so don't take it personally and understand that their negative response might be due to their past experiences, and if you receive a bad reaction, don't let it deter you from being assertive in the future. 

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