BY TINA FEY
Being an introvert often leads to cognitive dissonance as you simultaneously crave deep connections while valuing independence, seeking only fulfilling and emotionally safe relationships that are truly deep and intimate.
Uncertain about spending time with others, introverts sometimes reluctantly attend events due to fear of disappointing others or shifting moods, secretly hoping for plan cancellations, which, while disappointing to others, can be a relief to introverts.
Have you ever experienced the uncomfortable stares when dining alone? It's a common introvert experience, where solitude isn't loneliness but a chance to savor peaceful moments, often misunderstood by others.
I believe I'm a warm and kind person, and many of you likely are too, yet initial impressions often label me as rude, snobbish, aloof, condescending, or stuck-up, when in reality, I'm simply introverted and prefer observing and listening rather than actively participating.
The horn effect, which assumes negative traits based on one observation, is sadly true for introverts, as their reserved behavior can lead others to perceive them as incompetent in various aspects, often causing self-esteem issues.
They often use phrases like "Live a little" or "Get out of your comfort zone," which, while well-intentioned, can come across as condescending and based on a misunderstanding that introverts are merely insecure or not experiencing life to the fullest by not being more spontaneous, despite many mature introverts occasionally stepping out of their comfort zones but doing so less frequently than extroverts.
Collaborating in group projects at work can be especially challenging for introverts, who find it draining and compromising to their independence, despite not thinking themselves superior to colleagues.