Ysolt Usigan Schmidt
Whether your guy is the confident or not-so-confident type, everyone can always use some encouragement. You can easily boost his self-esteem with compliments, but what else can you do?
Without saying a word, these actions can make a huge impact in helping your dude feel extra good about himself.
1) Be genuinely interested in him.
If you truly are interested in him, showing that interest should hopefully come naturally.
This would involve making yourself vulnerable enough to connect with him and show him that you care about him.
When he speaks, show him you understand. If he’s having a tough time, be a good listener. If you’re enjoying time with him, let him know by laughing, smiling, and engaging in the activity with excitement.
2) Listen to him when he speaks.
Put down your phone. Actively listen with intent.
Be mindful of what he’s saying so you can be ready to react, respond, or add to the conversation when he’s done speaking. Try your best not to cut him off because that may show that you’re more interested in what you have to say, instead of him, which will create insecurity in his psyche.
3) Make eye contact.
When you engage in eye contact with anyone—let alone the person you love— gazing into eyes is so important.
It’s one of the best ways to make a connection with someone. And the eye contact will go a long way to make him feel confident about what he’s saying and doing.
4) Smile at him sincerely.
If he’s telling you a fun, funny, or interesting story, and you’re not smiling, he may think he’s the worst storyteller ever.
He may also think you find him boring, which will impact his self-esteem in a negative fashion.
Use your pearly whites to show genuine interest.
5) Match his energy.
A surefire way to give your significant other a healthy dose of confidence is to show him you’re on his side.
By matching his energy—especially if he’s in the midst of conflict—he’ll know his feelings are valid and his perception is accurate.
6) Show affection.
It might be a gentle touch of your hand on his lower back to show support. It could be an unexpected hug. Or, how about a welcomed pinch on the toosh?
Touch has the power of conveying comfort and love without needing words.
These little gestures of affection will remind him how much you care. It’ll also reinforce your attraction.
7) Use body language to express admiration.
Similar to showing affection, you can also use your body language to tell him how interested you are in him.
For instance, try nodding during a deep conversation. Give a thumbs up from afar when he is making all the right moves. Clap when he tells a really entertaining story.
This will work especially well in public situations.
8) Take note of his preferences.
Remember his favorite meals, and surprise him with it on your next date night in.
Buy concert tickets for his favorite band next time they’re in town.
You might even want to wear that dress he loves to see on you.
From big deals to small things, the fact that you took note of his preferences will make him feel so loved and cared for.
9) Anticipate his needs.
He might be “your baby,” but he’s not a baby.
Knowing he always likes to have sparkling water with dinner rather than tap will make him feel like he’s the most important person in your life.
Making his preferences readily available when you’re together, and knowing what he needs before he can even utter a word, will go a long way.
By creating an environment where he feels valued and supported will contribute to an increased sense of confidence.
10) Support his passions.
Does he have a hobby that he absolutely adores? Buy him gifts that align with his interests.
If he is in a band, don’t nag him about how much he spends on making and playing music. Be as supportive as you can be when you see him engaging in his passion.
And it’s not just your support that will make him confident, him improving his skills and doing something he loves will boost his self-esteem.
11) Show up for important events in his life.
Whether it’s showing up for his band’s concert or being his date to a friend’s wedding, if you are available for his most important events, he’ll know exactly how important he is to you.
Your commitment will give him comfort. As his partner-in-crime, your little unit can take over the world!
Having you by his side will improve his confidence.
12) Celebrate his wins—no matter how big or small.
It’s a given, you should go out to eat when he lands that new, exciting gig. If his kickball team wins the championship, be at the game to clap and cheer.
You should toast to every success to communicate your pride and encouragement.
13) Truly see him.
By now, you must’ve heard the phrase, “I see you.” It indicates you deeply know someone and you recognize all of their great qualities.
Saying “I see you” directly can boost his confidence, but you can express this idea even without words by:
- Using two fingers to point to your eyes, then point to him
- Gently nodding
- Slightly raising your eyebrows with a smile on your face
- Positioning yourself closely to him
When to give your man a confidence boost
If the actions above come naturally to you or are relevant to situations, go for it. But, as busy as we all get, it’s easy to forget to fill our man’s self-esteem tank.
When should you turn things up? Here are some clues he may need the extra effort from you:
- When he’s having a rough day at work.
- If he’s having a conflict with a loved one.
- When he’s just suffered a loss (minor or major).
- After you two have had an argument where you were at fault.
- When he expresses that he’s feeling uneasy about your relationship.
- If he’s going through something scary or stressful.
- When he’s experiencing pressure to perform or do well.
- When he’s showing insecurities and you want to remind him that you see him.
While boosting a man’s self-confidence is not your job, it will help maintain a healthy connection with your partner. He will appreciate you if you appreciate him.When you recognize all of his positive qualities, he will reciprocate and give you the same level of support. Consider it a powerful tool for engaging your partner and strengthening your love.
