9 underrated traits of people who prefer solitude over superficial interactions

If you’re anything like me, you sometimes feel a little out of place and guilty because you’d rather enjoy your own company than indulge in shallow conversations.

I get it. 

Society can sometimes make you feel like something is wrong with you for preferring alone time over superficial and rather boring interactions.

But the truth is, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with enjoying hanging out with yourself.

(As long as you don’t go too recluse and end up living sequestered away in a basement.)

Often, those who value their own space and peace and prefer meaningful conversations over shallow chatter possess a great many underrated traits that are often overlooked.

So, let’s change the narrative.

Today, we’ll delve into the 9 underrated traits of people who prefer solitude over superficial interactions.

This might make you feel a little uncomfortable, but stick with me.

My aim here isn’t to drive you away from your solitary ways and out of hibernation. 

If anything, I really want to show you that your preference for solitude is okay, and is nothing to feel guilty or misguided about.

Now, you may already recognize some of these traits in yourself.

…let’s discover the rest.

1) Self-awareness

The first time someone told me I was self-aware, I inwardly cringed. Self-aware to me equals conceited and egoistic.

But that’s not true at all. If anything, quite the opposite.

It means you know how you come across, how you think compared to others, what makes you tick, and what sets you off.

And weirdly, not everyone knows that sort of information about themselves.

If you’re someone who cherishes solitude, you probably have a heightened sense of self-awareness too. 

You might often find yourself introspecting and living in your head; understanding your emotions to a degree that not everyone can muster.

You’re likely also very aware of your strengths and weaknesses, which is an incredibly underrated trait. 

Not everyone can look within and truly understand themselves, flaws and all.

2) Deep thinker

Love getting lost in thought, even if it’s unintentional?

Pondering over life’s mysteries and complexities, questioning the status quo – sounds like my cup of tea!

If you prefer solitude in which you can ponder and muse to your heart’s content over superficial interactions, chances are you too are a deep thinker. Perhaps even a highly sensitive person.

Rather than engaging in trivial chit-chat (about the weather…how mundane!) you prefer to explore profound ideas and concepts. 

And yes, this trait of yours is often misinterpreted as being aloof or detached. (I’ve been called aloof aplenty myself.)

But the truth is, this ability to think deeply is a rare and valuable quality that does set you apart from those whose emotions and thoughts only linger on the surface.

3) High emotional intelligence

Did you know that people who prefer that quality alone time often have a higher degree of emotional intelligence? 

Emotional intelligence (or emotional quotient/EQ) being the ability to manage your own emotions and understand the emotions of those around you.

They are usually more in tune with their own feelings, which also allows them to better understand and empathize with the feelings of others. 

This heightened emotional intelligence can make them excellent friends and confidants, as they can provide thoughtful and compassionate advice – often able to put themselves in the shoes of whomever they are speaking to.

Whilst homebodies might not be the life of the party, they sure are the ones their friends turn to in times of need.

4) Authenticity

People who love alone time and thrive in that solitude are often the most authentic individuals.

They aren’t trying to fit into a mold or to be something they’re not, as is the case with many social butterflies or chameleons who adapt to each situation or person.


Whilst they value their own company, this doesn’t mean they don’t value other people; it’s just that they choose quality over quantity when it comes to relationships and have little interest wasting time on clout chasing or social climbing.

They are unapologetically themselves, and it is this authenticity that makes them truly special. 

Plus, in an age where so many people strive to fit in a certain box which society applauds, choosing to stay true to oneself is a trait worth truly cherishing.

5) Creativity

pic1509 9 underrated traits of people who prefer solitude over superficial interactions

Is it a surprise that these solitary individuals are often the most creative?

It’s in these peaceful environments that thoughts are set free and allowed to flow freely.

This quietness and solitude enables them to create art that truly reflects their inner emotions, in a way that they might otherwise struggle to convey in spoken words.

If you’re someone who prefers solitude, would you also say you have a creative side?

Because at least for me personally, it’s in those quiet moments alone that my mind has the freedom to wander and explore new ideas – particularly when it comes to crafting fantasy worlds and elaborate storytelling.

Without our host of wonderful solitary individuals, we would lack so much richness in art and culture which benefits us all today.

6) Listener

Even though those who prefer solitude…prefer solitude, they are often the most excellent listeners – as contradictory as that may sound. 

They may not be the first to engage in small talk, but when it comes to meaningful conversations, they are wholeheartedly invested in the conversation and ready to offer the most insightful advice.

They’re also genuinely interested in hearing about people’s experiences and thoughts, even if they vastly differ from their own. 

New knowledge means more thinking and learning, both of which are treats to a deep thinker.

7) Independence

This one might seem pretty obvious, but people who enjoy their own company are naturally more independent. 

To a degree, they have to be. Who is going to fix the boiler when you live alone?

These individuals don’t need constant social interaction to feel content or fulfilled

They can take care of themselves quite well, make their own decisions without outside input, and are confident in their ability to handle life’s ups and downs on their own. 

This independence is not just admirable, but also incredibly empowering.

And yes, this can stray into hyper independence which proves problematic in relationships down the line, but for the most part, being able to look after yourself is always a great trait to have.

8) Patience

“Patience is a virtue”.

I can almost hear my mother’s voice. And my grandma’s, too.

Patience is also something you’ll find in abundance in people who prefer solitude. 

They don’t rush through life; instead, they take the time to savor each moment and take their time.

Whether it’s immersing themselves in a good book for a whole afternoon, or having no issue waiting for the microwave to hit 2 minutes (what seems like an eternity for everyone else), patience is really something that calm and solitary individuals revel in.

9) Resilience

Finally, those who are at peace in their own company tend to have the ability to face adversity head-on and ping back from setbacks. Bouncy-ball style.

They know that they can rely on themselves in tough times and this gives them the strength to overcome challenges without flailing around and demanding assistance. 

Whilst it may not seem like much on the surface, this steely resilience is a trait that cannot be underestimated by any means

Final words

In a world that often values social extroversion, it’s important to recognize and appreciate these sometimes underrated traits of those who prefer solitude. 

These individuals often possess profound self-awareness, resilience, empathy, and creativity – all of which are qualities which set them apart and contribute to their unique strengths.

And if you’re a solitude lover (like me), embracing these traits can help you to feel more at home in the world and more empowered in your peaceful, self-sustaining way of life.

Picture of Liv Walde

Liv Walde

London-based writer with big thoughts, big dreams, and a passion for helping others.

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