If you’ve ever felt an intense, undeniable connection with another person, it’s likely that you were lucky enough to find your twin flame. So, what is a twin flame?
A twin flame is a special relationship that brings a deep, meaningful, and often chaotic connection with another human being that you feel immediately upon entering their lives.
This kind of relationship can be overwhelming and your own anxieties may cause you to extinguish this twin flame before it is able to really burn.
Don’t let your opportunity to experience such a profound connection slip away because you can’t handle the intensity of the relationship.
So how can you spot a twin flame relationship as opposed to a false twin flame? More importantly, how can you make it thrive?
Let’s dive in!
What You'll Learn
Signs you’re in a twin flame relationship
1) It’s like you’ve known each other your entire lives.
Have you ever met someone and you immediately felt like you have known them your entire life?
It’s a strange and unsettling feeling to realize you have not, in fact, met this person before, but you get along as if you were old friends or long-lost-lovers.
This can be the first sign that this person is your twin flame and is meant to be in your life permanently.
2) You have an instant, intense bond with them.
Getting along with a stranger better than you get along with most friends and family can seem strange at first, but before you know it, you’re spending a crazy amount of time with your twin flame.
And it’s not weird at all.
Instead, it feels completely natural. That’s because it is!
Whether you work together or bump into one another in the market, you’ll find yourself drawn to them and wanting to be with them more and more.
This instant bond is an undeniable sign you’ve found your twin flame. Don’t ignore it!
QUIZ: Is he really your twin flame? Remove the guesswork by taking this fun new quiz. Check out the twin flame quiz here.
3) You feel like you literally expand when you are with them.
You feel a sense of calm and euphoria when you’re with your twin flame.
You find that your desires and material wants are brought down a notch when you two hang out. This is because a twin flame relationship fulfills your needs; it is all you need in your life.
They provide such balance and tranquillity in your life that nothing else is needed. You’ll be content to just sit there and enjoy each other’s company.
4) They make you a better person.
When you’re around your twin flame, they’ll make you feel like a better person.
When you feel better, you’ll start living better.
You’ll find yourself striving to make them happy and to make others in your life happier.
You’ll put the needs of others ahead of your own and you’ll feel proud to be associated with this person.
In short, they’ll help you become a fully realized version of yourself.
For more on how twin flames make you a better person, check out Ideapod founder Justin Brown’s video below.
5) It’s like the waiting is over when they finally come into Your life.
You feel an instant sense of relief when your twin flame enters your life.
You might not know why right away, but you know that this person makes you feel happy and relieved.
It is important to recognize that you are going to be on a journey with this person and that they are important to your life in some way. Be open to what it could be and you’ll soon find out.
6) You find yourself drawn back to them over and over again.
If you aren’t already in a friendship or relationship with this person, you’ll find that they come into your life in all sorts of ways: you’ll bump into one another, you’ll have the same friends, or you might even work in the same building.
This is due to your energy fields attracting to each other.
Don’t fight the attraction, lean into it!
7) They serve as your teacher, lover, supporter.
When you find your twin flame, you’ll feel a renewed passion for life. You won’t sweat the small stuff, because you know you’ll always have someone in your corner.
You now have a guide, a supporter, a mentor, a friend. They’re a powerful source of fulfillment.
8) You don’t have to hide anything from them.
The best part of finding your twin flame is that you can be yourself.
You have to be.
Your twin flame is your mirror image, so you can’t hide your true self from them. In fact, they will instantly recognize the areas of your life that are not authentic to you.
The good news is that they’ll help you root out those false forms so that you can live as your authentic self.
Don’t hide who you are from this person, it will only strain the relationship.
Be glad to have a home with this person who accepts you for who you are inside.
9) You felt an immediate recognition when you met this person.
When you have a connection with someone that’s so instantly strong, you might feel like you knew them in another life.
Perhaps you have! (Who knows, really?)
But, this intense feeling of recognition is a powerful form of connection and a strong signal that this person is more than a simple acquaintance; they’re possibly your twin flame.
10) You could just tell that they are supposed to be an important part of your life.
You don’t know why, but you felt like you were meant to meet this person at the exact moment you did. They agree with you when you talk about how it all came about. This sensation is because you are connected across many levels.
11) You feel at ease about who you are and how you show up around them.
No matter if you are wearing yoga pants or a little black dress, your twin flame doesn’t care about how you look, they only care about how you feel and if you are happy.
Likewise, you are just grateful to see your twin flame, no conditions attached.
12) You feel like you are meant for bigger things in life.
You’ve always felt like there was supposed to be more in your life, but you could never put your finger on it in a way that made sense to you. Once you met your twin flame, everything seems to fall into place and you feel like you can do anything together.
Your twin flame is your spiritual magnifier. Together, you help each other achieve heights you never imagined.
13) You can connect with them on many different levels.
You get them emotionally, spiritually, mentally and physically. Everything clicks and you couldn’t imagine having that with anyone else in your life the way you do with your twin flame.
14) You’ve matured after coming into this relationship.
Before this relationship, you felt that you were going nowhere. Friendship, love, work; you were just racing in circles.
But now, you have a sense of direction and calm. Everything is coming up in your favor.
This is because your relationship with your twin flame has helped ground you. Once you know your twin flame has your back, you can move forward knowing you have stability and support.
QUIZ: Is he really your twin flame? Remove the guesswork by taking this fun new quiz. Check out the twin flame quiz here.
15) Your world feels bigger when they are around you.
Life opens up in many ways when you are connected to your twin flame. You may have doubted your reach before, but now you know you can do whatever you put your mind to.
Maybe your twin flame has encouraged you to travel or to apply for jobs you never imagined you’d land.
Whatever it is, this mutual encouragement leads you to expand your own world by pushing back on what you thought was impossible.
16) They intensify your connection to the Earth, nature, and the divine.
When your twin flames connect, you forge a connection that both grounds you to Earth and to nature, as well as open you up to higher beings and spiritual worlds.
They’re both your anchor and your antenna to the worlds around you.
17) They bring balance to your life.
They are the yang to your yin, the black to your white, the high to your low, and the sugar to your spice. They just seem to fit in your life and even if you question its truth, you know it’s real.
Likewise, you balance them out. You also serve to keep them attuned to the world around them.
Don’t discount the amazing role you play in their lives.
18) They evolve with you.
Because you have your twin flame’s back, and they have yours; you can open yourselves up to emotional and spiritual evolution. They’ll become a better person in tandem with your personal development.
19) You feel like the wait is over now that they are in your life.
If you are like most people, you’ve spent a lot of time wishing and waiting for a meaningful relationship to show up in your life.
When your twin flame shows up, you know it’s important. You may not know right away that the person is your twin flame, but you suddenly find yourself no longer pursuing extraneous friendships or romances.
The search is over, whether you’ve realized it or not.
20) You describe very different childhoods and yet find many similarities buried in the stories.
Despite having grown up in different places with different beliefs and different experiences, you know that those differences are what make you unique.
Though these differences may seem profound, once you scratch the surface you’ll see that there are some powerful similarities that forged the very nature of your twin flame souls.
You’ll be amazed at how two kindred spirits arose out of different circumstances, and you’ll find comfort in the similarities that persist.
21) You have learned to forgive.
Your twin flame makes you a better person and allows room for forgiveness into your life that wasn’t there before. You share more with people and feel comfortable being vulnerable, even if it means you get hurt.
22) You feel like you can really trust your twin flame.
You can’t say why, but you know that you can absolutely trust your twin flame.
This person has your back, keeps your secrets, and will never betray you. Likewise, you couldn’t fathom betraying your twin flame. It would be like betraying yourself.
Whatever your relationship is with your twin flame, platonic or romantic, don’t let that person out of your life. It’s worth the work to keep them in it.
Essential elements of a twin flame relationship
1) Find the balance you both need.
When you first meet your twin flame, you might feel overwhelmed by the intense sense of connection you have with this new person in your life.
This is natural.
Tanya Carroll Richardson in Mind Body Green says that twin flames often say that they’ve “never felt this way with another person before. There was this strong connection very early on. And the physical chemistry between us is off the charts.”
However, this intensity can take a toll on you. You need to learn how to balance your relationship so that you aren’t exhausted from intense and chaotic feelings for one another.
You need to be able to have time apart from your twin flame.
The good news is that your twin flame should understand.
Saorise Brown says in Elephant Journal that the main purpose of a twin flame relationship is to connect you back to your “higher self, to source and to take you to a higher level of consciousness.”
So, if your twin flame is there to help you connect to your higher self, they’ll know when you need a bit of time apart.
2) Create space for emotions in your relationship.
Twin flames are exactly like real fires. They burn intensely on their own.
But if you put them together, they become even brighter.
This intensity can be overwhelming. Your flame can cause you to become emotionally overheated.
To ensure your twin flame relationship thrives, you need to give each other room and time to process your newfound emotions.
Lauren Suvalin in Psych Central says that a common scenario with a twin flame is that one partner may be experiencing “deep and painful emotions that may have been suppressed.”
Rather than run away, a twin flame relationship can help you process these emotions and reach a higher vibrational frequency.
Lachlan Brown in Hack Spirit explains that a twin flame’s powerful, magnetic connection may cause “partners to separate for a short time to heal and address old wounds,” all the while knowing that separation is an illusion and their connection and shared energy “will keep them linked regardless of physical space.”
This is why twin flames often talk about a “shadow” — or the dark side cast by that of brilliant light.
Our twin flames can illuminate our strengths and our flaws. It might be painful to look at the dark side of life, but sometimes it can be the best thing for our growth.
3) Allow for physical connections.
Even if your relationship is not romantic, it doesn’t mean that there’s not a need for physical contact.
You’ll want to be near them, hug them, and engage in other forms of physical contact.
Because of the spiritual high you each get from coming into contact with each other.
According to Alex Myles in Elephant Journal, when twin flames meet in person, there is an immediate, intense physical attraction that comes from your two energy fields being drawn to each other.
When these energy fields collide, they “release Kundalini energy, an awakening stored at the base of the spine.”
Whether or not you believe in frequencies and vibrational energy fields, it can’t be denied that the physical connection is passionate, intense, and comforting.
When you’re with your twin flame, it may almost feel blissful.
If you do have a romantic relationship, you’ll need to make sure you are both capable of handling such a connection and be sure to take it slow so that you don’t become overwhelmed with emotion following a physical connection.
Laying some ground rules about your connection might be helpful to ensure that both of your physical needs are met, whether or not it’s a romantic relationship.
4) Respect the spirituality of your relationship.
If you want your twin flame relationship to be successful for years to come, you need to respect the spirituality of your partner and incorporate it into your life.
Why? Because it’s the spiritual connection that twin flames say is the strongest part of their bond.
This connection is remarkably deep and feels as if the soul of the person itself is connected to the twin flame’s soul.
You could call it unconditional love or a feeling of “coming home”.
According to Alex Myles in Elephant Journal, this twin flame connection allows both of those involved to spiritually “evolve at a far higher speed than before they met.”
Similarly, by delving deep into your emotions and experiencing the beauty of releasing your “shadow side,” your emotions and spirit can reach a higher vibrational frequency.
In fact, Myles says in Elephant Journal that “one of the determining signs that twin flames have connected spiritual” is when they can “sense each person’s emotions.”
We’ve all experienced this before: having a connection so deep that you can sense what they’re thinking and feeling. You can regularly finish their sentences for them!
When you have a connection so deep, don’t dismiss your twin flame’s needs for spiritual nurturing. Everything needs to work together to make sure the relationship is strong.
Stages of a twin flame relationship
Twin flame relationships are very powerful and have a profound effect on the lives of their members.
Often, the relationship goes through a series of stages.
This is where you first realize that something is missing in your life. You identify that there may be a source out there that is your spiritual mirror.
After you meet your twin flame, you begin to identify that this person will play an important role in your life.
This is where you awaken to the reality that this person you met is your twin flame. You realize that this person is more than just a friend, they are your soul’s mirror.
This is where you and your twin flame attempt to set up boundaries. It is difficult, as your attraction will make you resist any form of boundary. These failures to set up appropriate boundaries will lead to conflict.
Your twin flame often reveals profound truths about who you are as a person. These truths can be extremely uncomfortable and can put your relationship into crisis mode.
The power of the twin flame relationship can become too great. As a result, you or your twin may put distance between the two of you, attempting to regain individuality.
This is where you and your twin understand that your souls are twinned. No amount of running can stop that. Likewise, you can’t force your twin to come back to you. Instead, you surrender yourself to the attractions of your energy fields, knowing your souls will reunite.
At last, your twin flames have reunited. This time, however, the flame is more stable. You have both finally achieved balance.
Difference between a twin flame and a life partner
Twin flames can be life partners, but they aren’t always the same. Here are a few key differences.
1) Life partners revolve around love, twin flames revolve around truth
Twin flame relationships are about both people discovering their true selves. This process can be painful, but it allows you to become your best self.
Life partners revolve more around genuine selfless love for their partner.
Both can exist in the same relationship, but a twin flame relationship isn’t automatically a life partner, and vice versa.
2) Twin flames burn away baggage, life partners accept our baggage
Our twin flame helps us heal. By being a mirror image of ourselves, twin flames allow us to see our negative baggage that we’ve been accumulating. In this way, we can start the process of healing and “burning” away our baggage.
Life partners, on the other hand, are ones who embrace our baggage, warts and all.
3) Twin flames are our mirrors, life partners are our complement.
When you meet a twin flame, it might feel like you’re meeting yourself. Your spiritual similarities are incredibly profound.
Life partners are not necessarily so similar. In fact, they often have key differences. However, these differences serve to complement each other. Your life partner balances you out in a way that your twin flame might not be able to handle.
How to find your twin flame
We all long for that intense, immediate, once-in-a-lifetime kind of love that strikes us down and forever changes our paths in life.
If you’ve never experienced it, you might not believe it’s real, but rest assured, that kind of knock-you-to-your-knees love is real and it’s available to anyone.
The trouble with this kind of love, however, is that we don’t always recognize it for what it is because we think that it’s romantic love.
You don’t need to experience romantic love in order to find someone who is meant to be your soulmate and challenge you in the most amazing ways.
Of course, it helps if your twin flame comes to you in the form of a romantic partner because we’ve been primed to identify our soul mates as romantic soul mates.
Platonic twin flames, however, are just as valid, profound, and life-changing.
Whatever form your twin flame takes, be assured that they will help you live your life to its fullest extent.
If want to find your real twin flame, watch the video below by Ideapod founder Justin Brown. He shares 7 key steps to take.