12 traits of women who don’t need approval from anyone but themselves

A self-assured woman is a force no one can ignore. 

She exudes a special magnetism that is inspiring and sometimes even intimidating if you’re not used to it. 

But most of us aren’t born this way. If you were, consider yourself a lucky minority. 

Truly not needing approval from anyone often takes many years of painful, life-shaping experiences and self-growth to help you become someone who genuinely is able to give herself all of the approval she needs. 

How do you know if you are in the presence of a woman who doesn’t need approval from anyone but themselves? 

And how do you know if you are one of those women?

I’ve put together a list of 12 traits that will help you determine that:

1) Self-confidence

First and foremost, self-confidence is a more obvious trait of many women who don’t need approval from others

It’s important to note that confidence isn’t always as simple as being outgoing, outspoken, or flamboyant. In fact, sometimes (but not always) this can be someone trying to appear confident. 

Confidence can also be expressed as a quiet reserved air of certainty. She may not feel the need to force her opinions into the conversation but has a graciousness nonetheless. 

However, a confident woman is happy to share her thoughts if she is asked. 

She has a strong belief in her own abilities and her value, which allows her to make decisions and take action without seeking external opinions or validation. 

2) Independence

When a woman doesn’t need external validation, she tends not to need to rely on others for her financial, emotional, mental, or spiritual well-being. 

She has the capability of balancing her own needs with self-care, pursuing her goals, and whatever else she may seek to achieve in life. 

She has built her life in a way where she is capable of looking after herself and needs no one else, yet whoever she includes in her circle is there because they magnify her joy and vice versa. 

3) Authenticity

Who doesn’t love an authentic woman?

While a lot of people struggle to live in a way that is authentic because they are bound to try to impress people, say the right things, or be accepted – an authentic woman needs no approval. 

She is authentic because she trusts herself enough to not have to hide, change, or pretend to be someone else to be liked. 

She has an inherent knowledge of her positive qualities and trusts that they will be seen by those who matter.

She also holds the wisdom to know that if someone doesn’t like her authenticity, they’re probably stuck in their own conditioning of how people ‘should’ be and won’t be inspiring for her to spend time with. 

4) Positive self-talk

Positive self-talk is truly important on the journey of becoming someone who needs no approval from others. 

Because it’s important to learn to give yourself that approval or encouragement.

When you speak to yourself negatively, you tend to look outwardly for validation from external sources. 

So a self-assured woman will constantly forgive herself for her mistakes, have empathy for herself, and offer herself the love she needs first. 

5) Inner strength and resilience

She will bounce back from setbacks and challenges, viewing them as opportunities for growth rather than as failures. 

Also, her strength comes from softness and an ability to be honest with herself – not by dismissing her emotions and steamrolling over them to ‘stay productive’. 

This resilience contributes to her self-assured nature.

6) Uplifts others

When your self-love is genuine, you tend to want to encourage others to find it too. 

Because it’s an exceptionally beautiful feeling!

You lose any interest in ‘getting ahead’ of others or putting them down. Your joy is contagious and you tend to want to uplift others to experience the way you do about yourself. 

7) Healthy boundaries

phrases to avoid if you want to sound like a strong and confident person 2 12 traits of women who don’t need approval from anyone but themselves

When you stop needing approval, you also stop letting people overstep your boundaries. 

Not setting boundaries comes from people-pleasing tendencies and not wanting to say ‘no’. It’s essentially prioritizing others’ wants before your needs. 

So a woman who approves of herself will respect her own needs and boundaries first, even if it means disappointing or saying no to someone else. 

8) Sense of purpose

Have you ever heard of the saying: “If you don’t believe in something, you’ll fall for anything”?

I’m not sure how accurate it is in every context, but it’s accurate in this one. 

A woman who knows where she is going, who she is, and lives with integrity, won’t let anyone or anything direct her off her purpose or what she believes is important. 

Also, a purpose doesn’t necessarily have to be a career or a tangible goal. It can be living by certain values and principles, and letting those guide you!

9) Adaptability to change

Just because you have a sense of purpose doesn’t mean you’re inflexible to the currents of life. 

Think of purpose as the ‘why’, while remaining flexible to the ‘how’. 

A woman who needs no approval is unattached to the ‘how’ and the minor details of life, such as job title, income, status, and other superficial labels. 

As long as her purpose remains seen, she can navigate life’s changes with her ability to let go of what’s no longer serving her. 

10) Self-aware 

A deep understanding of one’s own strengths, weaknesses, and values will take anyone a long way on a self-development journey. 

A self-assured woman will probably have developed self-awareness in order to cultivate all of the other traits on this list. This helps guide her decisions and actions.

So, don’t overlook the power of building self-awareness!

11) Emotionally intelligent

When you are consistently self-aware in your interactions and relationships, you will eventually develop emotional intelligence

This is an important trait to have. Not needing approval from anyone because you are emotionally detached is likely to come from some form of trauma or unhealthy pattern.

Whereas, if you don’t need approval yet are still able to maintain healthy relationships, feel your emotions, and navigate others’ emotions – that’s where the hard yet fulfilling work is.

12) Brave and courageous

Last but not least, she is brave and courageous!

She isn’t afraid to take (well-considered) risks from time to time and step out of her comfort zone. 

She’s unconfined by societal norms and standards and gives herself permission to express herself freely, without letting fear of judgment stop her. 

Final thoughts

In the presence of a woman who doesn’t seek approval from anyone but herself, you’ll find a remarkable blend of strength and grace. 

Becoming a woman who doesn’t need approval from anyone but herself often requires years of self-growth and impactful life experiences. 

It’s a journey worth embarking upon—one that leads to a life characterized by authenticity, resilience, and an unshakable sense of self-worth. 

So, whether you recognize these traits in someone you admire or aspire to embody them yourself, know that this path is a journey that celebrates the unique essence of each individual, and what works for others may not be right for you. 

Learn to trust your own inner guidance on what feels uplifting, what feels light on your conscience, and keep moving towards those things.

Trust me, they won’t lead you astray. 

Picture of Shela Riva

Shela Riva

Shela Riva is a Thai-Swiss freelance writer, artist, energy mentor and co-creator of Jaiyen Eco Resort, a creative retreat space in Thailand. She is deeply passionate about our incredible ability to transform and is dedicated to helping each person realize the power within themselves, whether through her writing, empowering custom art pieces, one-on-one work or in-person retreats.

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