When we hear the words “strong women”, we tend to immediately think of girl-bosses and headstrong females like Beyonce and Sheryl Sandberg.
And while it’s likely true that they’re strong, real strength doesn’t have to be loud.
If you want to know what a strong woman really looks like, here are 10 things strong women do differently in their daily lives.
1) They remind themselves of their strength
Strong women know that their inner voice has a big impact on how they see themselves and how they make decisions.
So, like a prayer, they’d tell themselves that they’re one strong woman—morning, afternoon, and night.
They can have variations of it like “I’m invincible”, “I’m one tough cookie”, or “I’m wonder woman!”, but they serve the same purpose: to empower themselves.
They know that life can throw things their way that could make them feel little and less capable, so by reciting their mantra, they’d shield themselves from negativity, and encourage themselves to keep going.
2) They don’t try to impress others
A woman who is genuinely powerful isn’t going to be concerned about impressing others, and that is because she’s more concerned about impressing herself.
She’s not going to scroll through her wardrobe thinking “Will they think I’m classy if I wear this?”. Instead she’ll ask herself things like “Do I like wearing this?” and “Do I feel good in this outfit?”
She does this in more important areas of her life as well like her career and choice of partner.
And when people tell her to prove that she’s strong by doing outrageous stunts like eating an exotic insect or jumping off a cliff, she’d graciously say no if those are not things she really want to do.
One of the fastest ways you can figure out the “haves” from the “have-nots” is to pay close attention to how hard they try to let people who they are.
And well, strong women already have that strength inside of them, so why do they have to prove it?
3) They focus on what matters
We all have a lot on our plate, and unfortunately way too many of us get easily distracted and fail to focus.
Strong women on the other hand, have mastered the art that is self-control. They know that if they want to achieve their goals on time, then they should winnow away the chaff and focus on the things that matter.
So things like drama and gossip have no place in their lives, not even as a means to know people better or to bond with the one sharing the gossip.
If someone gets their kicks out of something as pointless yet harmful like that, they’re not the kind of person a strong woman would enjoy associating with.
They also don’t put much attention on the small stuff. Doing so gives them free time to actually achieve their goals.
4) They take risks
Strong women are strong because they always try to step out of their comfort zone and face their fears.
If they feel like they simply hate their job—perhaps due to low pay, bad management, or poor benefits, for example—then they’ll leave it even if there’s no other job lined up.
If they find that their relationship is toxic and simply unsalvageable, they’ll leave it even if there’s a chance they might end up single forever.
And if they can see that they won’t have a good future in their home state, they’ll look into moving into another state… or even move to another country.
Strong women know that they need to take risks in order to have the life that they want. Risks might be terrifying, but they know that NOT taking risks is 100x more risky.
5) They invest in a good support system
There’s this common misconception that being strong and independent is about standing up all by yourself—pulling yourself up by your bootstraps and being a self-made woman and all that jazz.
Strong women see this as the pile of toxic nonsense that it is.
Nobody is truly capable of being completely independent. We all need one another, and no matter how strong they may be, there are just things they need help with.
And so they befriend people, they strengthen their network, and they maintain their core friendships. They make sure they’re building bridges with people who they know they can trust, and not burn any bridges unnecessarily.
If they must face the challenges of life, they must do it with trusted people at their side.
6) They shield themselves from negativity
This is more than just about refusing to engage with Negative Nancies and Pessimistic Petes. Many strong women have no choice but to face them on a daily basis.
However, they do take active effort to keep their distance from such people. They refuse to befriend and hang around people who seem to have nothing to say but negativity because they know it could be infectious.
But if they have no choice, they simply refuse to let negativity get to them—even harsh and direct insults like “Are you an idiot or what?!” or “nobody’s going to love you if you stay this way!”.
There’s enough negativity in the world, and they’d rather not let it get under their skin.
7) They get inspiration from others
Strong women pay close attention to other strong people.
They learn and get inspiration from, say, Oprah Winfrey. She has faced hardship and trauma while growing up but is now a perfectly happy billionaire.
They will look up to the likes of Joan d’Arc, Michelle Obama, Marie Curie, and Greta Thunberg—all powerful women who have lessons to share in word and deed. All powerful women who refuse to simply play the role of a “dainty maiden.”
And if those women could manage to be so strong, then surely she herself can be as well.
8) They let go of baggage—big and small
We all get loaded with baggage as we go through life, some big and some small. Some of us even hold on to this until the day we die.
It’s not always easy to let go of that baggage, but that’s precisely what strong women do.
If their mother used to beat them as a kid, they will try to bury the hatchet and look forward to the future instead. And if they find it challenging to let go, they’d ask help from a therapist.
And if they get frustrated at their colleague in the morning, they’ll try their best to cool down so that they can just move on before the day ends.
They know that in order for them to live a happy life and reach for their goals, they must not let their baggage weigh them down.
9) They don’t gaslight themselves
Society likes to imply that women are simply somehow “crazy” or “emotional” and that they’re just overthinking or being dramatic.
Strong women don’t buy this. They don’t “shush” themselves and instead acknowledge how they (and others) truly think and feel.
They simply aren’t going to say “You’re not really sad, you’re just being dramatic.” or “Maybe they’re right, maybe they’re not really offensive and you’re just overreacting.”
If they ever have doubts, they’ll try to see first if their doubts actually are true.
Most of the time? Their feelings are actually justified and they allow themselves to feel how they truly feel and say what they really want to say.
10) They laugh at their misfortune
Bad things happen. For strong women, it’s just part of life.
They refuse to let mistakes, misfortune, and bad luck tear them down. Instead, they have learned to simply laugh it off.
Every mistake is a lesson to be learned, and bad luck simply is just something that’s out of people’s hands to control anyways.
So they try to learn what they can from their mistakes and laugh at their setbacks. In doing this, they keep their spirits high, and sometimes simply taking things lightly means the difference between giving up and forging on.
And so, they’d rather laugh than beat themselves to death for their mistakes or cry buckets about how sad their life is.
Don’t think that being strong or weak is something you’re born into. No—strength is something you grow in yourself day after day.
Small little habits like the ones I’ve just described can do a lot to build you up into becoming a strong woman yourself.
It’s not easy to be a woman. It hasn’t been so in the civilized word for at least the past two thousand years. But so long as you have the will, you’ll eventually have real strength.