7 things only introverts will understand in an extroverted world

As an introvert myself, I know the struggles and challenges that come with navigating a world seemingly designed for extroverts.

We may feel like outsiders, longing for a quiet space to retreat to and recharge.

But despite what some might believe, being an introvert is far from a deficit. In fact, it comes with its own set of strengths and quirks that make us who we are.

So let me take this moment to shout from the rooftops (or in this case, my keyboard) about the joys and realities of being an introvert.

We may not be the life of the party, but we have a wealth of thoughts, emotions, and experiences to share.

And though we might prefer the comfort of communicating through screens, we still have a lot to offer the world.

So let’s raise our virtual glasses and embrace our introverted ways. 

Here are 7 things only introverts would understand. 

1. Small Talk is Downright Painful

Ah, small talk. A staple of social interactions, but for us introverts, it’s a special kind of torture.

The thought of making idle conversation with someone we barely know is enough to send us running for the hills (or, more likely, hiding in the bathroom).

It’s not that we don’t enjoy chatting with others or making new friends, it’s just that small talk often feels shallow and pointless.

As introverts, we prefer meaningful conversations and deep connections, not just talking about the weather or what we did over the weekend.

Small talk can also be draining for us, as we need to put on a social mask and expend energy trying to act extroverted.

It’s a game we don’t always feel equipped to play, and it can leave us feeling exhausted and depleted.

So, when faced with small talk, we may politely smile and nod, but inside we’re counting down the seconds until we can escape to the safety of solitude.

To our extroverted friends, we ask for understanding and patience, for we are not shunning you, but simply trying to conserve our energy and preserve our sanity.

2. We Rehearse What We’ll Say Before Any Type of Conversation

As introverts, we often spend a lot of time thinking before speaking, especially when it comes to social situations.

We like to have a plan, to know what we’re going to say, and to avoid any uncomfortable silences or awkward moments.

So, before any kind of conversation, whether it be a casual chat with a friend or a formal presentation in front of a crowd, we’ll often rehearse what we want to say.

We’ll run our words over and over in our minds, trying to anticipate any questions or comments that might come our way.

This rehearsal process allows us to feel more prepared and confident, and it also gives us a sense of control in an otherwise unpredictable situation.

It’s a coping mechanism that helps us to overcome our natural shyness and social anxiety, and to engage with the world on our own terms.

And while this may seem odd to our extroverted friends, who thrive on the spontaneity and unpredictability of social interactions, it’s just another aspect of what makes us introverts unique.

So, next time you see us muttering to ourselves before a conversation, just know that we’re just getting in the zone!

3. We Need Alone Time to Recharge

For introverts, alone time is not just a luxury, it’s a necessity.

After spending time in social situations, we often feel drained and in need of some quiet time to recharge.

It’s not that we don’t enjoy the company of others, it’s just that social interactions can be mentally and emotionally taxing for us.

Alone time gives us a chance to decompress, to reflect on our experiences, and to reset our batteries.

It allows us to process our thoughts and emotions and to connect with ourselves on a deeper level.

Whether it be through reading, writing, hiking, or simply sitting in silence, alone time is how we refuel and prepare for the next social encounter.

It’s a common misconception that introverts are loners, but that couldn’t be further from the truth.

We value our relationships and connections with others, but we also need time to be by ourselves to maintain our well-being.

So, to our extroverted friends, we ask for your understanding and respect for our need for alone time.

We promise it’s not personal, it’s just how we recharge and become the best versions of ourselves.

And when we return from our solitary adventures, we’ll be ready to face the world with renewed energy and enthusiasm.

4. We Hate It When People Tell Us to “Live a Little”

As introverts, we often hear the well-intentioned phrase, “live a little.”

It’s usually said by extroverted friends or family members who are trying to encourage us to be more spontaneous, to step out of our comfort zones, and to embrace new experiences.

However, this phrase can be incredibly frustrating and condescending for us introverts.

It implies that our quiet, reserved nature is somehow lacking, and that we need to change who we are in order to be happy and fulfilled.

The truth is, we do live a little, in our own way. Our idea of living might be different from that of an extrovert, but that doesn’t make it any less valid.

For us, living can mean a quiet night with a good book, a long hike in nature, or a meaningful conversation with a close friend.

We introverts are wired differently, and that’s okay. We don’t need to be told to “live a little,” because we are living, just in our own unique way.

Our introversion is not a problem to be fixed, but a characteristic to be celebrated and respected.

So, to all those who try to tell us to “live a little,” we ask for your understanding and respect for our introverted ways. We promise to continue living, just in our own introverted fashion.

5. We Prefer Listening Than Talking

For introverts, listening is often more enjoyable and fulfilling than talking.

We tend to be quiet observers, taking in our surroundings and processing information before responding.

We listen carefully and thoughtfully, always seeking to understand the perspectives and experiences of others.

Listening allows us to connect with others on a deeper level, to learn new things, and to form more meaningful relationships.

We value the knowledge and experiences of those around us and enjoy being a part of the conversation, even if we’re not the ones doing most of the talking.

That’s not to say that we don’t have anything to say, because we certainly do! When we do speak, our words are carefully chosen and thoughtfully delivered.

We prefer to talk about subjects that are meaningful and important to us and to engage in conversations that are substantive and thought-provoking.

For us introverts, listening is a strength, not a weakness. We embrace our quiet and observant nature and are proud to be excellent listeners.

So, to our extroverted friends, we ask for your understanding and appreciation for our love of listening. We promise to continue to listen, learn, and engage in meaningful conversations with you.

6. We Do Actually Crave Connection

Contrary to popular belief, introverts do crave connection with others, but not just any type of connection. We seek deep, meaningful relationships with a select few individuals who we trust and value.

For us, the quality of our relationships is more important than the quantity.

We would rather have a few close friends who we can confide in and depend on, than a large network of acquaintances.

We enjoy spending time with those we care about, and we are fiercely loyal to those who are a part of our inner circle.

We also seek connection through our interests and passions.

Whether it’s a hobby, a cause, or a project, we love to immerse ourselves in something that we’re passionate about, and to connect with others who share that same passion.

This type of connection allows us to feel like we’re a part of something bigger than ourselves, and to make a positive impact in the world.

So, even though we may be introverted, it doesn’t mean that we don’t crave connection. We simply seek connection in different ways, through deep and meaningful relationships with others, and through our interests and passions.

And to those who think we don’t crave connection at all, we say this: we may be introverted, but we’re still human, and we still desire to connect with others in meaningful ways.

7. We Like Going Out Alone

Going out alone can be a daunting experience for some people, but for introverts, it’s often quite the opposite.

We are perfectly fine with and often prefer spending time alone. This doesn’t mean that we’re lonely or isolated, but rather that we value our own company and find comfort in being alone.

We use our alone time to recharge, reflect, and pursue our interests and passions.

Whether it’s reading a book, going for a walk, or trying a new hobby, we relish the opportunity to spend time alone and do something that we enjoy.

We find solitude to be rejuvenating and restorative, and we look forward to it after a long day of socializing or being around people.

We also don’t feel the need to fill every moment of our alone time with activity. For us, simply being alone and enjoying the quiet is enough.

We’re content to sit and be in the moment, and to savor the peace and tranquility that comes with being alone.

So, for those who think that introverts don’t like going out or that we’re unhappy when we’re alone, we want to set the record straight. We are perfectly fine with going out alone and enjoy spending time by ourselves. For us, alone time is a source of comfort, joy, and fulfillment.



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Lachlan Brown

I’m Lachlan Brown, the editor of Ideapod and founder of Hack Spirit. I love writing practical articles that help others live a mindful and better life. I have a graduate degree in Psychology and I’ve spent the last 6 years reading and studying all I can about human psychology and practical ways to hack our mindsets. If you to want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Twitter or Facebook.

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