12 things happy couples never do after an argument

Arguing is a part of any relationship. But what separates happy couples from the rest is how they handle the aftermath.

Let me tell you, it’s not about never having disagreements, but what you don’t do after an argument that really counts.

There are certain behaviors and actions that happy couples consciously avoid to maintain harmony and love. And trust me, these can make a world of difference.

So, here’s a sneak peek into the lives of happy couples with 12 things they never do after an argument. Read on and you might just find the secret to long-lasting happiness in your relationship.

1) They never play the blame game

Arguing can be stressful, no doubt. But what’s even more damaging is playing the blame game afterwards.

Happy couples know the importance of accountability. Instead of pointing fingers and blaming each other, they acknowledge their parts in the disagreement.

It’s all about understanding and acceptance. They avoid the temptation to keep a score of who’s wrong and who’s right.

They know that it’s not about winning an argument, but nurturing a relationship. So, steer clear of the blame game if you want to maintain harmony post-argument.

And believe me, this simple shift in behavior can make your relationship stronger and happier.

2) They never go to bed angry

I can’t emphasize this one enough. One thing I’ve noticed in my own relationship is that we never let the sun set on our anger.

One particular incident comes to mind. We had a pretty heated argument one evening about something that, looking back, wasn’t even that important. The tension was palpable, and we both retreated to our corners of the house to simmer down.

But as the night wore on, I realized how counterproductive it was to sleep on our anger. So, I approached my partner, not with the intention of continuing the argument, but to make peace.

We talked it out, acknowledged our mistakes and apologies were exchanged. Yes, it was uncomfortable but we felt so much better afterwards. We went to bed with clear heads and woke up without any residual anger.

That’s something happy couples understand – unresolved anger can fester and turn into resentment. So they choose to resolve their issues before hitting the sack, no matter how difficult it might seem at that moment.

3) They never bring up past arguments

Did you know that dwelling on past arguments can actually be harmful to your relationship? This is because it creates a pattern of negative thinking, making it harder to move forward.

Happy couples understand this. They treat each disagreement as a separate incident and never use past arguments as ammunition in their current disputes.

Once an issue has been resolved, they leave it in the past, where it belongs. This ability to let go of previous disagreements allows for growth and fosters a healthier relationship dynamic.

It’s like cleaning out a wound – if you keep picking at it, it will never heal. Similarly, constantly bringing up old fights can prevent your relationship from healing and moving forward.

4) They never ignore each other’s feelings

In the aftermath of an argument, it can be easy to dismiss or overlook your partner’s feelings. But happy couples avoid this pitfall.

They recognize that each person’s feelings are valid, even if they don’t agree with them. They listen to each other, acknowledge the emotions at play and work towards understanding the root cause of these feelings.

By doing this, they not only show respect for their partner, but they also foster emotional intimacy. This kind of empathy and understanding forms the foundation of a strong and lasting relationship.

Always remember, it’s not about who’s right or wrong, but about how you make your partner feel. In the end, feelings matter more than facts in the world of relationships.

5) They never let an argument escalate

Arguments can get heated, that’s a given. But happy couples have a knack for preventing them from spiraling out of control.

They are aware of their emotions and know when to take a step back. If they sense that the argument is becoming too intense, they may suggest taking a break to cool down.

It’s not about avoiding the issue, but rather preventing damage that can be caused by saying things in the heat of the moment. They understand that some things, once said, cannot be taken back.

So, they choose their words carefully and avoid letting their emotions get the best of them. It’s all about maintaining respect and love, even in the midst of a disagreement.

6) They never forget the love

emotional consequences of feeling unloved in a relationship 12 things happy couples never do after an argument

In the heat of an argument, it can be easy to lose sight of the bigger picture – the love that binds you together.

But happy couples, they never forget this. Even when they disagree, the undercurrent of love never dissipates. They may feel frustrated or upset, but they never let those emotions overshadow the love they have for each other.

They know that arguments are temporary, but their love is constant. They hold on to this truth, even when things get tough.

So remember, no matter how big the argument, don’t let it cloud the love you share. Because at the end of the day, love is what truly matters.

7) They never shut each other out

After an argument, it can be tempting to wall yourself off, to retreat into silence. I’ve been there, trust me. It feels easier to just shut down rather than trying to sort things out.

But I’ve learned that this doesn’t help. In fact, it only widens the gap between you and your partner.

Happy couples understand this. They keep the lines of communication open, even when it’s hard. They express their feelings and thoughts rather than shutting each other out.

By doing this, they build trust and understanding, even in the most challenging times. 

8) They don’t forget to say sorry

I have to admit; I used to struggle with saying sorry. I would dig my heels in, stubbornly refusing to admit when I was wrong. But then, I realized something. Saying sorry isn’t a sign of weakness; it’s a sign of respect for your partner and the relationship.

Happy couples aren’t afraid to apologize. They understand that everyone makes mistakes and saying sorry isn’t about accepting defeat, but acknowledging a lapse in judgment or action.

It’s about valuing your partner’s feelings over your ego.

And so, I’ve learned to say sorry when it’s due, and trust me, it has made all the difference.

9) They don’t threaten the relationship

There’s this one time when in the middle of an argument, I blurted out, “Maybe we should just break up.”

I didn’t mean it, but in the heat of the moment, I said it anyway. It was a mistake.

Threatening to end the relationship during an argument can create insecurity and instability.

Happy couples refrain from making such threats. They know that even in disagreement, it’s crucial to maintain the sanctity and security of the relationship.

10) They never disrespect each other

Image 11.25 4 12 things happy couples never do after an argument

Arguments can sometimes bring out the worst in us. But no matter how heated the argument gets, happy couples never resort to disrespect.

They know that words can hurt, and once said, they can’t be taken back. So they make it a point to treat each other with respect, even when they disagree.

They avoid name-calling, offensive language, and put-downs. They respect each other’s viewpoints and agree to disagree if needed.

This level of mutual respect ensures that even their arguments are healthy and constructive, rather than destructive.

11) They don’t keep score

Remembering who did what in an argument is a common but destructive habit. Keeping score only prolongs negativity and prevents resolution.

Happy couples understand that every disagreement is not a competition to be won or lost.

They don’t keep a mental tally of each other’s wrongs and rights.

Instead, they focus on finding a solution, understanding each other’s perspectives, and moving forward.

They believe in forgiving, forgetting and growing together from the experience.

12) They never lose sight of their partnership

Above all, happy couples never forget that they’re on the same team. Arguments may come and go, but they always remember that they are partners navigating through life together.

They understand that disagreements are not battles to be won but hurdles to be overcome together. They approach conflicts as a team, focusing on finding solutions rather than winning the argument.

This mindset shift transforms the way they view arguments – not as threats to their relationship, but as opportunities for growth and understanding.

Wrap up: It’s about love and respect

The dynamics of a relationship are complex and deeply personal. Yet, the essence remains the same – a bond built on mutual love and respect.

When it comes to arguments, it’s not about avoiding them but navigating through them in a way that strengthens your bond. And the key lies in what you don’t do after an argument.

Whether it’s refraining from playing the blame game, not holding grudges, or never losing sight of your partnership – they all are signs of respect for the relationship and love for each other.

Every argument is an opportunity for growth, an occasion to understand each other better. Use it wisely and watch your relationship bloom into a beautiful partnership.

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Tina Fey

Tina Fey

I've ridden the rails, gone off track and lost my train of thought. I'm writing for Ideapod to try and find it again. Hope you enjoy the journey with me.

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