Rick Brune
We’ve all got those handy lists for improving our communication game. And they’re great, no doubt.
But here’s a scoop – knowing what to steer clear of holds even more power.
Those sneaky no-nos can slip into conversations and trip up our communication aims without us even realizing it.
Here are 8 crucial taboos to watch out for.
1) Interrupting the speaker
We’ve all been there – those times when you’re so eager to get your point across that you jump in while they’re mid-sentence.
Trust me, I get it, but effective communicators know that taking a breath and letting the other person finish is pure gold.
Think about it this way: interrupting can feel like slamming the brakes on a conversation. When we interrupt, we’re saying, “Hold up, my thoughts are more important than yours.”
But that’s not the vibe we’re going for, right? Effective communicators are like smooth jazz, they let the conversation flow.
They understand that giving someone the space to express themselves without interruption builds rapport and respect.
So, next time you’re in a chat, embrace the pause button. Bite your tongue if you have to. Let the speaker have their moment – it’s like giving them a little verbal stage to shine on.
And hey, your turn will come, and when it does, you’ll get the same courtesy.
2) Using judgmental language
You know the kind of language that makes you cringe when you hear it? Yeah, we’ve all been guilty of it at some point.
But effective communicators are the Jedi masters of keeping things respectful and open.
How about this: you’re in a chat, and someone drops a judgmental bomb like, “You always mess things up.” Ouch, right?
Effective communicators take a different route. They choose words that don’t sting but rather encourage a healthy exchange.
It’s like they’ve got a magic wand that turns harsh words into constructive ones.
Why? Well, judgmental language puts up walls. It makes the other person defensive and shuts down any real conversation.
Effective communicators want bridges, not barriers. They get that using kinder words doesn’t mean sugar-coating; it means creating an environment where ideas can flow freely.
The next time you catch yourself about to say something judgmental, pause. Think about how you can say it without causing a communication roadblock.
Remember, it’s not about being overly careful; it’s about being considerate.
3) Neglecting nonverbal cues
Nonverbal cues are those subtle eyebrow raises, nods, and gestures that speak volumes without saying a word.
Effective communicators have got these cues down to an art form.
Just imagine for a moment: you’re chatting with someone, and they’re nodding along while their arms are crossed and their gaze is wandering. Mixed signals, right?
Effective communicators, though, they’re like Sherlock Holmes of body language. They pay attention to these cues and use them to fill in the gaps between words.
Nonverbal cues give context and emotion to people’s words. They can turn a simple “I’m fine” into a heartfelt “I’m actually struggling.”
Effective communicators get that words might say one thing, but nonverbal cues can reveal a whole different story.
So, next time you’re in a convo, keep your eyes peeled.
Notice the raised eyebrows, the subtle head tilts, and the twinkle in someone’s eyes.
And hey, don’t forget about your own cues – they’re speaking louder than you might think!
Being mindful of these little gestures can make your conversations richer and more authentic.
4) Monopolizing the conversation
See if this resonates. I bet it does.
Someone starts telling a story, and suddenly, you’re like, “Oh, I’ve got a story that’s even better!”
But effective communicators? They’re the masters of keeping the conversation balanced and inclusive.
Here’s an everyday example: you’re in a group chat, and one person is going on and on while others are just nodding.
Not the best feeling, huh?
Effective communicators, though, are like the conductors of a symphony. They make sure everyone gets a chance to play their notes and shine.
Why? Because hogging the conversation is like throwing a blanket over everyone else’s thoughts.
Effective communicators get that sharing the stage creates a richer experience. They sprinkle their thoughts here and there, giving space for others to chime in.
When you’re tempted to share your amazing story, hold off a bit. Listen to what others are saying, ask follow-up questions, and let the conversation ebb and flow.
Trust me, your turn will come, and when it does, everyone will be excited to hear what you’ve got to say.
It’s like a dance where everyone has a chance to lead.
5) Failing to empathize
Empathy is like the heart and soul of meaningful conversations. It’s not just hearing someone’s words; it’s feeling what they’re saying, stepping into their shoes, and saying, “Hey, I get you.”
See if you can picture this: your friend is telling you about a tough day at work, and you respond with a casual “Oh, that’s too bad.”
Effective communicators, on the other hand, are the champs of saying, “I’m sorry to hear that. It must have been really frustrating.”
See the difference? They dive into the pool of emotions and swim alongside the speaker, and they encourage them to share more.
And they do this because empathy builds bridges. It connects people on a deeper level.
Effective communicators know that by validating someone’s feelings, they create a safe space where honesty and trust can thrive.
As soon as someone opens up to you, let your inner empath shine. Put yourself in their shoes and let them know you’re there, shoulder to shoulder.
It’s not about solving problems; it’s about being present, understanding, and saying, “You’re not alone in this.”
6) Jumping to conclusions
I’m sure you know that feeling when you hear half a story and your brain goes, “I’ve got this all figured out!”
Well, effective communicators are detectives who know that the full picture might be hiding a few surprises. You just have to give it time to unfold.
Here’s a great example: your friend starts telling you about a disagreement they had with someone, and you immediately assume who’s at fault.
Effective communicators, on the other hand, are like puzzle solvers. They take their time, ask questions, and gather all the pieces before forming a final picture.
Jumping to conclusions is like reading a book by only looking at its cover – you might miss out on the intricate characters and juicy plot twists.
Effective communicators understand that assumptions can lead to misunderstandings and hurt feelings.
Before you blurt out your “expert” conclusion, hold off a second…
Ask for more details, consider different perspectives, and give the conversation room to unfold naturally.
7) Avoiding difficult topics
Let’s chat about the art of not dodging those tricky topics in conversations. We all know those conversations that feel like tiptoeing through a minefield, right?
But effective communicators? They’re the brave explorers who understand that addressing the elephant in the room can lead to real growth.
When there’s an issue brewing and everyone’s avoiding it like the plague, effective communicators are problem-solving superheroes.
They know that talking about difficult stuff is like pulling weeds – it might be uncomfortable, but it’s necessary for a healthy garden.
They get that addressing challenges head-on can lead to resolution, understanding, and even deeper connections.
So, the next time you’re faced with an uncomfortable subject, approach it with empathy, respect, and a willingness to listen.
You might be surprised by the positive outcomes that can emerge when you shed light on the shadows.
It’s like turning on a lamp in a dim room – suddenly, things become clearer.
8) Disregarding feedback
Brushing off feedback in conversations is a very real issue for many of us.
You know that feeling when someone offers a suggestion, and you’re like, “I’ve got it all figured out, thanks”?
Well, effective communicators? They’re the growth enthusiasts who know that feedback is like a treasure map leading to better conversations.
Remember when someone gave you a tip to improve your presentation skills, but you shrugged it off?
Effective communicators, however, are like curious learners. They welcome feedback with open arms, knowing that it’s a chance to level up their communication game.
Ignoring feedback is like refusing to use a GPS when you’re lost – you might just end up going in circles.
Effective communicators understand that feedback offers fresh perspectives, helping them spot blind spots they might have missed.
The next time someone dishes out feedback, take a moment to listen. Whether it’s positive or constructive, it’s all valuable.
Don’t see it as criticism; see it as a way to fine-tune your skills and make your conversations even more engaging and impactful.
It’s like having a personal coach cheering you on from the sidelines!
In the grand symphony of everyday conversations, it pays to wield your baton wisely.
Embrace empathy, avoid pitfalls and nurture connections. Let these guide you toward richer, more meaningful interactions. It’s a surefire way to dramatically up your communication game.
