Growing up, I was often told that vulnerability was a weakness.
In my family, at school, and even in the playground, revealing emotions or showing how I truly feel was seen as a sign of fragility.
The unspoken rule was to maintain a stoic exterior—a facade of strength—even when the world around you seemed to crumble.
This followed me into adulthood and became my armor, both in my personal and professional life.
But one day, all my walls came crashing down.
I was lucky enough to have someone by my side to hold me as I fell apart. Someone I felt safe being vulnerable with.
And contrary to what I had been conditioned to believe, being vulnerable did not make me weaker. Instead, it did the opposite—it unlocked an unimaginable strength within me, the kind I never knew I had.
That strength was the power of being true to myself, forming meaningful connections with the people I love, and genuine self-love and acceptance.
With the help of my therapist, I was able to open up more. I finally let people in.
By showing up genuinely in all my interactions, whether it was with friends or coworkers, I learned that people didn’t recoil in discomfort or judge me as weak. Instead, they leaned in closer, their respect for me deepening.
But this newfound realization didn’t come easy.
Switching from being closed off to opening up and revealing my true self was like learning a new language. It felt foreign and uncomfortable at first.
However, with time, I began to see the transformational power of vulnerability in every aspect of my life.
Now, three years down the road, I can confidently say that being vulnerable is not a weakness but an incredible feat of strength.
It’s been a journey of self-discovery and growth that has changed my life in ways I never imagined possible.
Here’s how this journey unfolded and how embracing vulnerability transformed me.
My personal journey: The turning point
The turning point in my life came during a particularly challenging time.
My family was a mess. I was on the verge of a breakup with my girlfriend. I was constantly underperforming at work.
To put it simply, my life felt like it was all falling apart.
Until one day, it all came to a head. As I entered my apartment after a bad day at work, I burst out crying.
And it wasn’t just a simple burst out—it was a full-on panic attack.
It was my roommate—who was also my best friend, my chosen family—who held me as I fell apart.
As I calmed down, I talked about everything that had been bothering me recently. It was he who comforted me when I needed it most. It was that moment that finally pushed me to get the help I needed.
In fact, it was that moment that marked the beginning of my journey into embracing vulnerability.
Don’t get me wrong; it didn’t happen overnight.
In fact, I started small. I opened up to my best friend. I wrote my thoughts down. I acknowledged my feelings as they came.
Next, I finally accepted the fact that I needed help.
So I finally took that scary step and applied for my first consultation with a therapist. Unfortunately, I didn’t connect with her the way I needed.
That meant I needed to go through another grueling process of finding a therapist. Luckily, this time around, I found someone who really helped me.
After getting the help I needed, I was finally able to open up. To let other people in. So I made a conscious effort to share more about myself and my feelings in conversations.
I stopped hiding my emotions behind a mask of stoicism. It was terrifying at first, but with every step, I felt a little lighter and a little more like myself.
At first, it was with close friends and family. Gradually, I extended it to colleagues and acquaintances. I learned to express myself genuinely, without fear of judgment or rejection.
Over time, I noticed a profound shift in my relationships and self-perception. People were more drawn to me because I was being my true self.
On the inside, I felt stronger and more confident because I wasn’t carrying the unnecessary weight of pretending to be someone I’m not.
This transformation taught me an invaluable lesson: vulnerability is not a weakness but a powerful tool—one that could help you realize your best self.
Actively embracing vulnerability: A transformative process
For those of you who might be grappling with the same challenges, let me share how I consciously embraced vulnerability.
Like I said before, this was not an overnight process but a gradual shift that transformed my self-perception and relationships.
The first step was acknowledging my feelings and emotions.
Instead of brushing them under the carpet, I allowed myself to feel them fully. Whether it was sadness, frustration, or fear, I chose to experience them without judgment.
I also started indulging in self-reflection.
This helped me understand my emotions better and identify the triggers that made me close off in the first place. It was a journey of self-discovery that led to greater self-awareness and acceptance.
Finally, I practiced patience with myself.
Change takes time, and it was important to be kind to myself during this process. There were moments of discomfort and awkwardness, but every step forward was a victory in itself.
Embracing vulnerability is a continuous journey, not a one-time event. It requires conscious effort and patience.
But I assure you, the rewards are worth the effort.
The misconceived notion of vulnerability as weakness
Growing up, I, like many others, was taught that vulnerability equated to weakness.
This belief is deeply ingrained in our society.
We are conditioned to show strength, to keep our emotions in check, and to avoid revealing our struggles for fear of being seen as weak or incompetent.
On the surface, this belief seems logical. After all, who wants to appear weak or unstable in a world that values strength and confidence?
But after digging deeper, I realized that this notion was fundamentally flawed.
Vulnerability, I learned, is not a sign of weakness; rather, it’s a testament of courage.
It takes strength to show our true selves without the fear of being judged or misunderstood. It encourages empathy and understanding, creating an environment where we can truly be ourselves without fear of judgment.
This realization was in stark contrast to the societal narrative I had grown up with.
Taking a step back: Looking at the bigger picture
Reflecting on my journey, I’ve realized that embracing vulnerability is not just about opening up. It’s about taking responsibility for your life and learning to think for yourself.
This requires understanding how societal expectations, cultural programming, and external influences shape our beliefs and actions.
These are some of the most important lessons I learned in my journey—the things you need to do to be able to embrace vulnerability like I did:
- Acknowledge your current dissatisfaction or struggles.
- Face the reality of your situation—accept the fact that you need help.
- Muster the courage you need to seek out the help you need.
- Let people into your life. Know that they can’t help you if you don’t allow them to.
- Help yourself. No one else can give you what you need if you keep refusing the love they can give you.
Taking responsibility for my life has empowered me in ways I never imagined.
I’ve learned to question societal norms and expectations that I had unconsciously internalized. This has allowed me to live life on my own terms, with more purpose and direction.
And by acknowledging my struggles and dissatisfaction, I’ve been able to face the reality of my situation instead of resorting to blind positivity.
This has been instrumental in fostering self-growth and resilience.
This journey of self-exploration hasn’t been easy. It’s required conscious effort, patience, and a willingness to step outside of my comfort zone.
But it’s so worth it.
