I recently sparked a heated debate with my controversial YouTube video, “Why I’ve Decided to Stop Being a Good Person.”
In the video, I argued that constantly giving in to others and sacrificing our own needs and values in the name of being a good person is not the key to living a fulfilling life. Instead, we must learn to set boundaries and not give in to others all the time.
However, after much reflection, I’ve come to realize that there it is indeed possible to be a good person without constantly giving in to others. We can be good while also setting boundaries and living a purposeful life.
That’s what this article is all about. It shares the key characteristics of the kind of good person who also stands up for themselves.
Do you exhibit these traits? Check them out and let me know in the comments below.
1. Empathy
“The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.”
― Elisabeth Kübler-Ross
Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others.
It allows us to put ourselves in someone else’s shoes and truly understand their perspective.
While it’s important to be empathetic, it’s also important to recognize when our own boundaries are being crossed and to not allow others to take advantage of our empathy.
Empathy is crucial for being a good person because it allows us to connect with others on a deeper level and to show compassion and understanding towards their experiences and emotions.
However, it’s also important to remember that empathy doesn’t mean sacrificing our own needs and values in the name of understanding others.
2. Kindness
“Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle.”
― Plato
Kindness is a willingness to be generous and considerate towards others.
It’s an important characteristic of a good person, but it’s important to also recognize when our kindness is being taken advantage of or when we are sacrificing our own needs in the name of kindness.
Being kind doesn’t mean being a doormat or constantly giving in to others.
It means showing compassion and consideration towards others while also standing up for ourselves and setting boundaries when necessary.
3. Honesty
“It’s discouraging to think how many people are shocked by honesty and how few by deceit.”
― Noël Coward
Honesty is being truthful and sincere in all interactions.
It’s a fundamental characteristic of being a good person, but it’s also important to recognize when honesty may hurt or upset others and to find a way to communicate the truth in a compassionate way.
Honesty is crucial for building trust and maintaining healthy relationships, but it’s also important to remember that it doesn’t mean sacrificing our own needs and values in the name of honesty.
4. Respect
“Respect is the foundation of all healthy relationships.” – Unknown
Respect is showing regard and consideration for others’ feelings, beliefs, and rights. It’s important to respect others, but it’s also important to respect ourselves and not allow others to disrespect us. Respect is crucial for building healthy relationships, but it’s also important to remember that it doesn’t mean sacrificing our own needs and values in the name of respect.
5. Responsibility
“The man who passes the sentence should swing the sword. If you would take a man’s life, you owe it to him to look into his eyes and hear his final words. And if you cannot bear to do that, then perhaps the man does not deserve to die.”
―
Being responsible means being accountable for our actions and being reliable and trustworthy.
It’s important to be responsible, but it’s also important to recognize when we are taking on too much and to ask for help when needed.
Responsibility is crucial for being a good person because it shows that we are capable of taking care of ourselves and others.
6. Fairness
“Death is the fairest thing in the world. No one’s ever gotten out of it. The earth takes everyone – the kind, the cruel, the sinners. Aside from that, there’s no fairness on earth.”
― Svetlana Aleksievich
Being fair means being just and unbiased in our treatment of others.
It’s important to be fair, but it’s also important to recognize when fairness may come at a cost to ourselves and to not be afraid to advocate for ourselves.
Fairness is crucial for building healthy relationships and creating a sense of equality, but it’s also important to remember that it doesn’t mean constantly sacrificing our own needs and values in the name of fairness.
7. Forgiveness
“Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.”
― Oscar Wilde
Forgiveness is the ability to let go of grudges and resentment towards others.
It’s an important characteristic of a good person, but it’s also important to recognize when forgiveness may not be healthy or necessary and to take care of ourselves first.
Forgiveness is crucial for letting go of negative emotions and building healthy relationships, but it’s also important to remember that it doesn’t mean sacrificing our own well-being in the name of forgiveness.
8. Courage
“I wanted you to see what real courage is, instead of getting the idea that courage is a man with a gun in his hand. It’s when you know you’re licked before you begin, but you begin anyway and see it through no matter what.”
― Harper Lee
Courage is the strength to do what is right, even in difficult or uncomfortable situations.
It’s important to be courageous, but it’s also important to recognize when our own well-being may be at risk and to prioritize our own safety.
Courage is crucial for standing up for ourselves and others, but it’s also important to remember that it doesn’t mean constantly putting ourselves in harm’s way in the name of being courageous.
9. Compassion
“A human being is a part of the whole called by us universe, a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feeling as something separated from the rest, a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty.”
― Albert Einstein
Compassion is feeling and showing concern for others’ suffering or need.
It’s an important characteristic of a good person, but it’s also important to recognize when our own well-being may be at risk and to prioritize our own needs.
Compassion is crucial for building healthy relationships and showing concern for others, but it’s also important to remember that it doesn’t mean constantly sacrificing our own well-being in the name of compassion.
10. Gratitude
“In the end, though, maybe we must all give up trying to pay back the people in this world who sustain our lives. In the end, maybe it’s wiser to surrender before the miraculous scope of human generosity and to just keep saying thank you, forever and sincerely, for as long as we have voices.”
― Elizabeth Gilbert
Gratitude is being thankful for what we have and expressing appreciation to others.
It’s an important characteristic of a good person, but it’s also important to recognize when we have too much on our plate and to not be afraid to ask for help or say no to others.
Gratitude is crucial for cultivating a positive mindset and building healthy relationships, but it’s also important to remember that it doesn’t mean constantly sacrificing our own needs and values in the name of gratitude.
Conclusion
Being a good person doesn’t mean constantly giving in to others and sacrificing our own needs and values.
It means balancing kindness and compassion with standing up for ourselves and setting boundaries when necessary.
By embracing the essential characteristics of empathy, kindness, honesty, respect, responsibility, fairness, forgiveness, courage, compassion, and gratitude, we can be good people while also living a purposeful and fulfilling life.
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