11 surprising behaviors that reveal true intimacy in a relationship

There’s no loving romantic relationship without intimacy. The closer and more intimate you are to each other, the stronger your bond is. 

And while there are some typical behaviors that indicate closeness, such as cuddling, kissing, holding hands, comforting, sharing desires, etc., there are some that are surprising. Well, more or less. 

So, let’s explore these surprising behaviors that reveal true intimacy in a relationship.

1) Celebrating the unusual

Most couples I know only celebrate their relationship or marriage anniversary. And that’s it. There are no other milestones or other things about their relationship that they celebrate. 

However, some couples also mark unusual or offbeat holidays or anniversaries together, such as National Pizza Day or the day you first bumped into each other. 

This adds a touch of spontaneity and fun to their relationship.

For me and my wife, that’s Pancake Day or Pancake Tuesday. But instead of celebrating it only once a year, we do it every Tuesday. 

Apart from that, we also celebrate the days we adopted our cats 12 and 14 years ago. 

They’re nostalgia-filled days when we also reminisce about the days we were younger and just starting our lives together. 

Now, if we could only get our 3-year-old son and the cats to play along, that would be awesome. 

2) Intuitive understanding

Couples who have true intimacy typically display intuitive understanding. They have an unspoken connection between them

They’ve spent so much time together that they can almost read each other’s minds. 

It’s knowing what your partner needs or how they’re feeling without them saying a word. It’s like having a secret language that only the two of you share, and it makes your bond even stronger.

For example, you’re at a party, and you notice your partner giving you a subtle glance, which tells you it’s time to go without saying anything out loud.

Or, you can tell when your partner needs comforting words and a listening ear versus when they just need some space to process their emotions.

It’s little things like that that reveal true intimacy in a relationship or marriage. 

3) Cooking together

If you’re like us, most of the time you’ll be eating meals only one person prepared. That’s normal, right? 

One partner’s at work, or they have to take care of the kids, or they need to rest, or whatever the reason. Plus, more often than not, cooking is easier when only one person does it. 

That being said, if you don’t sometimes cook with your partner, you’re missing out. 

When you cook together, it’s like launching a culinary adventure as a team. You work side by side in the kitchen, trying out new dishes or old family recipes. 

And when the meal is ready, you get to savor the results together. It’s a great way to connect over something meaningful, and you get to create delicious memories.

The same goes for the following:

4) Building something together

Another behavior that reveals true intimacy is when you build things together. It could be anything from assembling a piece of furniture for your home, planting and tending to a garden, or even creating a work of art together. 

These shared activities are more than just tasks; they’re opportunities for teamwork and a chance to feel a sense of achievement together. 

It’s like saying, “We can create something amazing when we work side by side,” and it’s a great way to build a stronger bond.

It’s popular for couples to buy a fixer-upper and spend most of their free time working on it. If it doesn’t kill them, it certainly brings them closer together. 

5) Being each other’s biggest fans

Being each other’s biggest fans means wholeheartedly supporting your partner in everything they do. 

It’s about celebrating their successes, big or small, and genuinely sharing in their happiness. It also means standing by them during tough times, being a source of encouragement, and working together to achieve each other’s goals. 

It’s a sign of a strong, intimate relationship. As is this:

6) Daydreaming together

pic1503 11 surprising behaviors that reveal true intimacy in a relationship

Daydreaming together is like letting your imaginations take a fun little journey. You and your partner get to talk about all sorts of exciting and maybe even silly things you’d like to do or achieve in the future. 

It’s a bit like making up stories about your dreams. It doesn’t matter whether they’re big adventures, like traveling the world, or smaller, cozier dreams, like having a little house with a big garden.

But why is this cool?

Daydreaming can make your relationship feel like a playful adventure. It’s a chance to share your secret wishes and fantasies with each other. 

Imagine it like being kids again, making up stories and getting lost in the joy of possibilities. This makes your bond stronger and keeps the relationship fresh and fun.

7) Exploring fantasies

Creating a space where you both feel comfortable sharing and exploring your deepest fantasies and desires leads to a more adventurous and fulfilling connection.

But exploring fantasies isn’t just about trying something wild or taboo. It’s about promoting trust, curiosity, and understanding. 

It can lead to more exciting and fulfilling experiences in the bedroom. And that’s how you create a deeper and more intimate connection between the two of you.

8) Shared quirks

If, instead of focusing on what’s odd or peculiar, you and your partner see the beauty in each other’s quirks, you also have a lot of intimacy. 

These can be endearing habits, like the way they always hum a tune while doing chores or peculiar preferences, such as their fascination with collecting vintage comic books.

It’s all about appreciating the beautiful imperfections that make your love story uniquely yours.

9) Supporting each other’s passions and unusual interests

Supporting each other’s passions means being there for your partner and showing enthusiasm for what makes them happy, even if it’s not exactly your cup of tea. 

You’re making sure they know you’ve got their back and care about their well-being.

This also means you’re showing curiosity and encouragement for your partner’s unusual hobbies or interests. 

Even if it’s not something you’d usually dive into, your support proves your commitment to their happiness and shows you’re willing to explore their world with them.

Here’s a typical example of this:

Let’s say one partner is really into sports, while the other is passionate about art. Even if you’re not an art aficionado, you can attend art exhibitions or museums together and express genuine interest in their favorite artists and styles. 

In return, the art lover can join the sports enthusiast to watch a game and cheer for the team.

10) Inside jokes

I love inside jokes. They’re awesome between friends but even more so between partners. 

They’re the kind of jokes that have you both burst into laughter thanks to a funny memory or a special moment you’ve experienced together. 

These inside jokes create a connection that’s uniquely yours and add a dash of humor to your relationship.

You’re basically real-life Jim and Pam from The Office. The two of them have a great connection because they’re always playful. 

11) Being playful

Playfulness keeps the relationship fresh and exciting. It injects a sense of joy and lightheartedness into your connection, making every day a little brighter.

It’s those moments when you tease each other, challenge one another in friendly games, or go on spontaneous adventures. 

Without it, you’re destined for a boring life together that you’re bound to regret having, sooner or later. 

If you want to have true intimacy, awaken the inner child and loosen up. Everything and everyone doesn’t have to be so serious all the time.

How to boost intimacy

Build special traditions together to strengthen the bond between you and your partner. These traditions are like your relationship’s “signature moves,” and they help create a sense of reliability and shared history.

Set aside a specific day each week for a date night. Go to your favorite restaurant, cook a meal together, or even watch a movie at home. 

These consistent moments allow you to reconnect and look forward to spending quality time with each other regularly.

Plan an annual getaway, like a weekend at the beach, a cozy cabin retreat, or a visit to a place you both love. 

These trips are exciting and an opportunity to make new memories together.

But above all, try creating memories as often as you can. They are the little details that bring you closer and make your connection unique.

Picture of Adrian Volenik

Adrian Volenik

Adrian has years of experience in the field of personal development and building wealth. Both physical and spiritual. He has a deep understanding of the human mind and a passion for helping people enhance their lives. Adrian loves to share practical tips and insights that can help readers achieve their personal and professional goals. He has lived in several European countries and has now settled in Portugal with his family. When he’s not writing, he enjoys going to the beach, hiking, drinking sangria, and spending time with his wife and son.

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