If you were raised by strict and rigid parents, you may have developed certain habits that continue to influence your behavior today.
These habits, often ingrained from childhood, can be subtle and difficult to recognize, yet they can have a significant impact on your relationships and personal growth.
Growing up with demanding parents wasn’t a choice you made; it was a circumstance you navigated, likely leaving you with unique challenges and coping mechanisms that still shape your life.
By understanding these habits, you can gain valuable insights into your behavior patterns and learn how to navigate your life more effectively, fostering healthier relationships and personal development along the way.
Curious to know how these habits might be affecting you? Keep reading to uncover the patterns that could be holding you back and discover how to overcome them.
1) Overthinking every decision
If you were raised by strict and rigid parents, you might have developed a habit of overthinking every decision you make.
This could be because as a child, your every move was scrutinized and you were constantly being corrected.
This constant scrutiny can lead to a fear of making mistakes, even in adulthood.
As a result, you might find yourself spending excessive amounts of time weighing the pros and cons of every decision, big or small.
You might even have difficulty making simple choices like what to eat for dinner or what to wear in the morning.
This overthinking can cause unnecessary stress and anxiety.
It can also hinder your ability to make quick decisions and trust your instincts, which are essential skills in many aspects of life.
By understanding where this overthinking stems from, you can work towards trusting your judgment and reducing the anxiety associated with decision-making.
2) Displaying extreme independence
Being raised by strict and rigid parents might also make you extremely independent.
While independence is often seen as a positive trait, in this case, it can be taken to an extreme.
You may have learned from a young age that relying on others can lead to disappointment or criticism.
So, you decided to take matters into your own hands.
This could mean doing everything for yourself, even when help is available and it would be more efficient to accept it.
This hyper-independence can lead to isolation and burnout.
You might find it hard to accept help from others, even when you need it.
It may also make it difficult for you to form deep, meaningful relationships, as you might struggle with vulnerability and the idea of relying on others.
While being self-reliant is a valuable trait, learning to accept help and support from others is equally important.
It can enhance your relationships, reduce stress, and prevent burnout.
3) Always aiming for perfection
Strict and rigid parenting often involves high expectations and harsh criticism, leading children to believe that they must be perfect in order to be accepted or loved.
Consequently, you might have grown into an adult who constantly strives for perfection in all areas of life.
This relentless pursuit of perfection, however, is not always beneficial.
It can lead to a phenomenon known as “perfection paralysis”, where the fear of making mistakes or falling short of your own unrealistic expectations can prevent you from starting or completing tasks.
Moreover, research has shown that perfectionism can lead to increased stress, anxiety, and even depression.
It’s also linked to lower levels of self-esteem and satisfaction in life.
4) Difficulty expressing emotions
Growing up with strict and rigid parents might have meant that your emotions were not always validated or understood.
Perhaps you felt you had to suppress your feelings to avoid conflict or criticism.
This can lead to a habit of bottling up emotions in adulthood.
It’s okay if you find it hard to express your feelings, even to those closest to you.
It’s a protective mechanism you developed as a child, and it’s served its purpose. However, holding in your emotions can create tension and prevent you from forming deep connections with others.
It might feel uncomfortable at first to express your emotions in a healthy way, but with time, it can become easier.
It’s never too late to learn how to communicate your feelings effectively and authentically. You deserve to be heard and understood.
5) Struggling with self-care
In a strictly disciplined household, the focus might have been more on achievement and less on personal well-being.
This might have led you to overlook the importance of self-care.
In adult life, you might find yourself prioritizing work, responsibilities, and the needs of others above your own.
Perhaps you feel guilty when you take time for yourself or you simply don’t know how to relax.
You might even find that you’re constantly running on empty, feeling tired and burnt out. But it’s important to remember that it’s not selfish to prioritize self-care.
It’s like the safety announcement on airplanes – you need to secure your own oxygen mask before helping others.
Start by taking small steps towards self-care. It could be as simple as taking a ten-minute walk during lunch, reading a book for pleasure, or making sure you get enough sleep.
These small acts can make a big difference in your overall well-being. You are worth taking care of.
6) Over-committing and struggling to say no
Being brought up by strict and rigid parents, you might have learned to always say yes to others, no matter how overloaded you already are.
This habit can lead to over-committing, leaving little time for yourself.
Picture this scenario: You’re already swamped at work, but when your boss asks if you can take on another project, you instantly agree, even though you’re already stretched thin.
Or a friend asks for a favor when you’ve barely got time to breathe, yet you can’t bring yourself to decline.
This habit might stem from a fear of disappointing others or a need for approval.
But saying yes to everything can lead to stress, burnout, and resentment.
It’s important to learn that it’s okay to say no sometimes.
Setting boundaries is a healthy practice and doesn’t make you selfish or unkind.
It simply means you’re taking care of your well-being, which in turn allows you to be more present and supportive when you do choose to help others.
7) Being overly critical of oneself
Raised by strict and rigid parents, you might have developed a voice in your head that’s constantly critical of your actions and choices.
It’s like having a personal critic living rent-free in your mind, always ready to point out your faults and shortcomings.
However, this internal critic isn’t doing you any favors. It’s not making you stronger or more disciplined; it’s just making you feel bad about yourself.
And honestly, it’s time to evict this unhelpful tenant.
Self-criticism might feel like it keeps you on track, but it often does more harm than good.
Instead, try replacing that critical voice with a kinder, more supportive one. Acknowledge your faults, sure, but also celebrate your strengths and achievements.
You’re doing better than you think, so give yourself the credit you deserve.
8) The power of self-awareness and self-compassion
If there’s one thing to take away from this, it’s the power of self-awareness and self-compassion.
Growing up with strict parents may have shaped you in particular ways, but it doesn’t define who you are or who you can become.
Recognizing these habits is the first step towards changing them.
It won’t happen overnight, but with patience and persistence, you can unlearn these habits and form healthier ones.
Most importantly, be kind to yourself in this process. You’re dealing with patterns that were established in childhood, and it takes time to change them.
Many people share similar experiences and struggles.
And by understanding your past and how it affects your present, you’re already making significant progress towards a healthier, happier future.
