The sad truth is that many relationships fall apart because we start to take one another for granted.
We either overlook or simply fail to express how lucky we are to have our partner in our lives.
In the early days, it may have been constant romance. But as time passes and routine sets in, it’s easy to forget those gestures that make someone feel special.
When it comes to love, the little things count.
That’s why the following simple things can help to make your partner feel loved every single day.
1) Say thank you
I’m not talking about a mumbled “thanks” as they pass you the TV remote.
No, I mean showing heartfelt appreciation.
Rather than just being a social politeness, that involves feelings of deep gratitude.
It demands that we recognize all the things our partner does for us, in order to reflect that back to them.
It can be useful to make a list of everything your significant other did for you in the past week — whether it be big or small.
Then consider how it made your life easier or what it meant to you.
The better we get at honing in on how damn lucky we are, the more we tend to show appreciation in our relationships.
2) Leave love notes for them to find
Once you’ve done your gratitude list of things you appreciate about your partner, why not put it to good use?
You can turn it into little love notes, adding a few of your favorite things about them into the mix.
You don’t need to be Shakespeare to do this. Your notes can be romantic, sweet, or even funny.
Perhaps you pin a note to the bathroom mirror reminding them how much you love their bum.
Maybe you pop a note in their lunchbox telling them that they’re your favorite person in the whole wide world.
3) Learn their love language
I was just discussing love languages the other day with my partner. Because knowing how each other likes to express and receive love is really useful in any relationship.
It not only helps to prevent misunderstandings, but it also ensures that your partner truly feels loved because you’re showing them in a way that means the most to them.
What matters most to your other half and what makes them feel most loved?
- Loving words
- Quality time
- Physical touch
- Acts of service
- Receiving gifts
It’s important to remember that feeling loved is very personal. So be sure to talk about the gestures that they like to receive.
We don’t have to guess, we can ask.
4) Ask them about their day in an original way
Whilst we’re on the topic of asking, here is a super simple way to make your partner feel loved:
When they get home, ask how their day went.
The truth is that many of us probably do this, but we don’t always do it well.
We may ask as a throw-away comment, without probably engaging or listening to the answer.
Sometimes the question can prompt a very short answer of “fine” or “good thanks” that never goes any deeper.
That’s why it can be useful to change things up a little by asking:
- What was the most interesting thing you did today?
- How have you felt today?
- What was the highlight of your day?
Ask about their day in a way that encourages more of a conversation.
5) Listen to their problems without trying to fix them
We all need to vent, and many of us look to our partners to do this.
When your partner comes to you to share something that isn’t going well, be careful not to fall into this well-meaning trap:
Don’t automatically dive in and offer a solution.
I know that may sound strange, but here’s why….
As the saying goes, a problem shared is a problem halved. And often, that’s what we want.
We want someone to hear us. That simple act is what lightens the load.
But when you try to fix your partner’s woes for them, it’s not always as well received as you may hope.
In fact, it can leave them feeling misunderstood and without their feelings being validated.
Instead, really listen to them to show your support and say things like:
- That must be really hard
- I’m so sorry you are feeling this way
- I would love to try to make you feel better, what can I do?
Before offering up advice, always be sure to ask:
- Are you looking for solutions or do you just want to talk about it?
6) Make them a priority by making an effort for them
One-on-one time is really important in any relationship. But as your other commitments pile up, it can quickly slip.
But remember that it’s about quality, not quantity. That’s why you can still show how much you care through even the smallest of gestures.
Examples might include:
- Cooking them their favorite meal
- Bringing home a little treat for them
- Bringing them breakfast in bed
- Getting dressed up for them
- Giving them your undivided attention when they’re speaking to you (put down your phone and turn off the TV!)
- Having a glass of wine ready for when they get home and sit down for a catch-up
7) Say sorry and mean it
We don’t just show our partners how loved they are through the good moments we share. It matters just as much how we handle the harder times.
That means holding our hands up when we get things wrong.
Don’t underestimate the magnitude of a heartfelt apology. And not just for the huge blunders either. It also applies to the little slip-ups that we can all make.
Say sorry and mean it when you’ve snapped at your partner.
Say sorry and mean it when you have acted selfishly.
Say sorry and mean it when you have inadvertently hurt their feelings.
8) Praise and compliment them
Flattery shouldn’t be exclusive to the early days of dating.
It is simply another way that we show our appreciation.
Don’t take for granted that your partner knows all the things you think are great about them. Show them that you see their kindness, humor, intellect, etc.
If they are special to you, highlight that to them with sincere compliments.
But always be sure to:
- Connect the compliment to something you genuinely feel
- Make it specific rather than hyperbolic
- Try to give compliments with depth rather than superficial ones (for example compliment their traits, not just their looks!)
9) Give them a cuddle
Physical intimacy isn’t just about sex.
We’re talking about holding hands, gentle touch, and having a cuddle.
It all helps to make couples feel closer because it releases plenty of oxytocin into our system, otherwise known as the love hormone.
That’s why a snuggle on the sofa after a long day can be all your partner needs to feel how loved they are.
10) Support them
Being in a relationship is about being in a team.
Your partner should feel like they can rely on you and that you have their back.
When they have something to celebrate, be the one who stands by their side telling them how proud you are. Encourage them with their ambitions and plans.
But you can also show support in some simple practical ways every day:
- Offering to pick up the kids
- Unloading the dishwasher without being asked
- Running errands for them
It’s all about doing things for your partner that pick up the slack and lighten their load.
11) Reflect on the good times
A trip down memory lane can be a really great bonding exercise.
In fact, you may have noticed that when you meet up with old friends you naturally start to chat about the good times you have shared together.
That’s because it brings back all those positive feelings once again.
You could:
- Talk about some of your happiest times with your partner and why they were so special to you
- Look at some of your favorite photos together
- Watch old videos of things you’ve done together
12) Be patient with them
One of the most meaningful ways that my partner makes me feel loved every single day is all too often overlooked.
And that is through his patience!
Patience is a very humble and unassuming quality.
It’s easy to lose our patience with loved ones, especially when we spend a lot of time together.
Becoming more patient might involve:
- Biting your tongue when it’s wiser to not speak
- Practicing greater empathy over your partner’s feelings
- Not always needing to be right all the time
- Taking a deep breath when you are tempted to overreact
- Finding more effective ways to communicate your frustrations
13) Tell them how you feel
We’ve looked at some wonderful and varied ways to show love in a relationship. But let’s not forget that one of the simplest and easiest ways is to tell them.
Never assume that your partner knows how you feel about them. Even if they do, let’s face it, it’s nice to hear!
If they make your life worth living, be sure to let them know. If you love them deeply, make sure they hear those three little words from you.
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