12 signs you’ve met “the one”, even if they’re not what you were expecting

Your new relationship is unlike any you’ve been in before. You’re happy, calm, and excited.

The catch? You were picturing your ideal partner in a completely different way.

And yet, you can’t help but feel like running on sunshine.

So, are they really “the one,” or are you just deluding yourself? Here are 12 clear signs that you’ve unexpectedly hit the jackpot.

1) You feel like you can be completely yourself around them

Let’s kick things off with a harsh truth.

When you hide away tidbits of yourself, dial down your personality, or play a part whenever you’re around a partner… it’s not good.

Now, however, you don’t feel the need to impress your significant other.

You’re not wearing a mask or pretending to be someone you’re not just because you’re afraid they’ll leave if they get a glimpse at the real you.

Instead, you’re free to be your flawed and unapologetic true self.

Even better, they actually find your shortcomings endearing.

Who would have thought that was possible?

2) There’s a deep level of connection you haven’t felt before  

You might have met your partner recently, but you feel like you’ve known them for a long time.

In fact, sometimes you know what they’re going to say before they open their mouth. Uncanny!

You can also read them with ease, and you have this weird ability to navigate their emotional landscape without them having to provide a detailed map.

On the same note, conversations between the two of you never feel awkward.

And they seem to completely get you as well.

Either the universe has a perverse sense of humor, or you’ve finally met “the one.

3) They push you to be your best self…

Your partner may love your flaws, but that doesn’t mean they won’t challenge you to become the best version of yourself.

Growing as a person is an important part of life, and your significant other knows how to gently push you to reach for the stars.

Whether they’re encouraging you to live a little healthier or finally ask for that promotion at work, they’re all about helping you succeed at whatever you set your mind to.

Maybe you thought that your ideal partner would be someone who stays with you in your comfort zone, where it’s safe and cozy. 

But since you’ve met them, you feel like you can accomplish anything. Knowing that someone is always there to cheer you on? Priceless.    

4) And support you when you aren’t

You might be in the most perfect relationship that has ever existed. Unfortunately, you’ll still experience terrible, horrible, no good, very bad days.

When one of those comes around, your partner doesn’t give you a hard time. Quite the opposite: they provide comfort.

They buy you ice cream and suggest watching your favorite movie. Or, they get you out of bed and take you on a hike.

They know what kind of support works best for you.  

And even when the bad days stretch into bad weeks or bad months, your partner doesn’t bail or make you feel like a failure for simply being human.

They’re a keeper, for sure.

5) There’s an unexpected feeling of trust

Regardless of how anxious you’ve been in previous relationships, that dreaded uncertainty seems to have evaporated this time around.

You’re not worried about where they are 24/7 or wondering if they’re lying to you.

If you see them talking to someone else, you don’t assume they have one foot out the door.

You have no idea why, but you trust them completely. Which is even weirder given that they’re nothing like you’ve pictured at all!

In more great news, you don’t seem to fret about where the relationship is going. You know inside your gut that it’s meant to be.  

You don’t need to pressure them to make room for you in their life, and you’re not afraid to commit to them fully.

Pure bliss.

6) You have things in common…

signs youve unexpectedly met the one 1 12 signs you’ve met “the one”, even if they’re not what you were expecting

People like to say that opposites attract. In reality, a relationship has a better chance to succeed if you have things in common.

Maybe you’re an introvert and you always thought it would be ideal to end up with a party enthusiast who would force you to socialize. In reality, wouldn’t that make you miserable at least 30% of the time?

Having things in common is especially important when it comes to “big picture” stuff.

You were thrilled to discover that you and your partner share the same values and life goals.

There’s no need to compromise on the important things.

You both want to buy a home in the suburbs and start a big family. Or to travel the world nomad-style, never settling down.

Whatever it may be, you seem to be on the same page.

7) But you also have differences

Agreeing on everything can be dull. Luckily for you, that’s not the case.

Your life objectives may align, and you share certain hobbies, but you still butt heads about the little stuff.

They dislike the TV show you’re currently obsessed with. You find their music taste appalling. 

When you were picturing the one, the two of you had absolutely everything in common. But now, despite these differences, you’re open to trying new things they’re into. And vice versa.

This brings us to another important sign that they might be perfect for you…

8) You can work through conflict productively

Did you think that fighting would come to a blessed end once you met “the one?” Sorry to break it to you, but disagreements happen.

For you two, however, they’re not the end of the world. You know how to fight productively.

You treat each other with respect, even when you’re in the middle of an argument.

You listen to each other. You weigh the other person’s point of view.

In short, you always know that you’re on the same team.

And if one of you loses track of that momentarily?

Deep down, you know that the other will be there to pick up the slack and fight for the relationship.

As a fun bonus, making up is always a treat.

9) The sex is magical

Speaking of making up, the sex? It’s the stuff of dreams.

Not only do you have chemistry, but making love feels incredible.

You never find yourself drifting off or being self-conscious.

You’re 100% in the moment, enjoying every second of it.

Moreover, you two share a deep level of intimacy, so you can talk about the experience afterward and share what worked or didn’t work for you.

You’re both open about what you like, and you can set boundaries about what you’re comfortable with.

No one feels pressure to do something they don’t want.  

After all, it’s hard to have earth-shattering sex without great communication.

10) Putting effort into the relationship is effortless

Planning a date night doesn’t feel like a chore. It’s a treat.

You also find yourself weirdly delighted to do them favors.

They may not be what you had in mind when you used to think about “the one,” but making time for them isn’t cumbersome; it’s something you just… do.

Without realizing it, they’ve become a priority. Go figure!    

11) But boring is enjoyable too

Is there a better feeling than doing “nothing” with someone and still enjoying it a whole lot?

You listen to a podcast while they scroll social media, and you’re having the time of your life.

Picking up groceries? It’s an adventure!

Cleaning? As long as you do it together, there’s nothing else you’d rather do.

You don’t need to engage in an activity or hang with friends to have fun.

You can simply lay in bed and chat mindlessly about the latest work gossip.

Perhaps your idea of “the one” involved someone with whom you would always want to go out, travel, and make the most of all experiences.

However, in a hectic world, doing nothing together isn’t just a blessing. It’s the key to maintaining happy relationships.

And you two are already experts at that.

12) They feel like coming home

When you find “the one,” they feel like home. Comfortable, warm, and secure.   

You realize that home isn’t a place. It’s a person.

Whenever you’re together, you experience a sense of belonging and peace.

It just feels right. You found your other half.

Your bond is unbreakable.

Final thoughts

You likely spent years crafting an image of your ideal partner in mind.

Sorry to break it to you: when it comes to people, perfection is a myth.

If you went through this list nodding with enthusiasm, there’s a good chance you lucked out.

Even if they don’t hit all the bullet points on your “must-have” list.

The Rolling Stones said it best:

No, you can’t always get what you want. 

But if you try sometime you’ll find you get what you need.

Picture of Alexandra Plesa

Alexandra Plesa

Alexandra Pleșa is a freelance writer obsessed with television, self-development, and thriller books. Former journalist, current pop culture junkie. Follow her on Twitter: @alexandraplesa

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