10 signs you’re in the right relationship, even if it doesn’t feel like it

Navigating the world of love and relationships can feel like trying to find your way through an unfamiliar city without a map. 

It can be thrilling, scary, and filled with uncertainty all at once. Often, you may find yourself asking: “Is this the right relationship for me?”

If you’re grappling with this question, don’t worry. 

It’s pretty common to have doubts. And that’s why I’ve put together this guide to help you read the signs that could tell you if you’re in the right relationship or not.

Remember, there’s no one-size-fits-all in relationships. Each one is as unique as the people involved. This isn’t about comparing your relationship with others. 

It’s about understanding whether your relationship is right for you. So, let’s take a look at the signs:

1) You’re able to be your authentic self

Don’t you just love being you? 

I mean, there’s only one ‘you’ in the entire universe, and that’s pretty cool! 

But, if you can be that unique self without the fear of being judged in your relationship, it’s a solid sign you’re in the right one

It’s about embracing each other’s quirks and imperfections, the freckle on your nose, the way your laughter sounds a bit like a hyena – and loving each other for them.

The truth is, we often wear different masks in front of different people. 

But when you’re with your partner, you should be able to shed that disguise, letting your authentic self shine through. 

It might feel odd, especially if you’re used to guarding yourself. However, true love and the right relationship will make you feel comfortable just being yourself.

2) Conflicts don’t mean the end

Let’s get one thing straight: Arguments are not synonymous with doom.

If you argue with your partner, it doesn’t automatically signal a dead-end relationship.

In fact, if you can have disagreements and still respect each other, it’s a strong indication that your relationship has legs.

You see, it’s not about the absence of conflicts, but how you handle them together. 

Remember, it’s not you versus them, it’s both of you against the problem. 

In my own relationship, this has been a struggle. I had the mindset that arguments meant we weren’t compatible, but 5 years later, I’ve realized something…

…They’re inevitable. Through accepting that, I’ve learned it’s more about communication than anything else. 

You tackle the disagreement, find a compromise, learn from it, and move on. 

It may not always feel like it, but your ability to weather these storms together is a surefire sign of a rock-solid relationship.

3) You give and take in equal measure

There’s a beautiful balance of give and take in the right relationship.

It’s like dancing – one leads, the other follows, and then you switch. It’s a harmonious exchange, not a one-sided show. 

If you find yourself and your partner alternating between giving and taking, pat yourselves on the back.

No relationship can survive if it’s lopsided. 

It’s not about keeping a score, but an overall equilibrium, where both partners feel valued and cared for.

So, even if you sometimes feel like you’re giving more than you’re getting, or vice versa, take a step back and look at the bigger picture. 

If the scales are balanced over time, you’re dancing to the right tune.

4) You’re motivated to grow together

In the right relationship, you’re not only growing old together, but you’re growing up together

Your partner pushes you to be a better version of yourself, and you do the same for them. 

Remember – it’s not about changing who you are, but fostering growth in each other to reach your full potential.

But I get it…

Sometimes, the push to grow might feel uncomfortable or challenging. 

You might feel like you’re being pressured or like your partner is demanding too much. 

I know I used to feel like this…In the end, my partner and I discussed my feelings and he realized his “tough love” approach wasn’t working for me. 

So he adjusted, and now we’ve fostered a safe environment for both of us. 

But remember, growth often sprouts from discomfort. The right relationship is not about stagnation but evolution, so don’t mistake those growth pains for love pains.

5) Silences are comfortable, not awkward

In the right relationship, silence speaks louder than words.

You’re able to enjoy each other’s company without the need for constant chatter. 

It’s that comfortable silence where you can just be, soaking up each other’s presence in tranquility.

Now, don’t worry if the occasional silence feels slightly awkward. 

No one expects you to be a Zen master in the relationship realm. 

The truth is, it’s the overall comfort in silence that counts. 

So, the next time you both are quiet, don’t rush to fill the void with words. Savor the silence, for it’s in those moments that your love speaks volumes.

6) Mutual respect reigns supreme

signs youre in the right relationship 1 10 signs you’re in the right relationship, even if it doesn’t feel like it

Let’s get real here – respect is the cornerstone of any healthy relationship.

If you and your partner value each other’s opinions, support individual dreams, and acknowledge boundaries, it’s a sign you’re doing something right! 

Even if it feels like your partner is a little too headstrong at times, try to see it from a different perspective. 

They might just be expressing their opinion strongly because they feel safe to do so with you. 

Don’t let temporary misunderstandings cloud the fact that mutual respect is a significant pillar in your relationship.

Especially if your partner listens and values your opinions, even if they don’t always agree with you. 

7) Happiness abounds

When it’s the right relationship, happiness is more than just an occasional visitor, it’s a permanent resident.

And this joy isn’t just about those grand moments but the little things.

It could be a shared laugh over a silly joke, a relaxing evening walk, or the pleasure of cooking together.

But beware of confusing perpetual bliss with happiness. 

Every relationship has its ups and downs, moments of frustration, and periods of doubt. 

(Yes, the fairytales lied to all of us).  

Yet, if there’s an underlying sense of joy that persists through these, a warmth that you feel when you think of your partner, there’s no doubt you’re in the right relationship.

8) Your friends and family see a positive change

Often, our friends and family can see things we might miss. 

They’ve known you long enough to notice when you’re changing, especially for the better

If they’ve commented on how happier, more confident, or content you seem, take it as a promising sign!

But, and this is a big but, this doesn’t mean that you should base your relationship’s worth solely on others’ opinions. 

Remember, they are not in the relationship, you are. 

But with that being said, a little external validation from those who care about you can act as a comforting sign you’re in the right relationship.

9) You share common goals

Shared goals and dreams are like the North Star guiding your relationship’s journey. 

If you and your partner are on the same page about your major life goals, that’s a wonderful sign of a promising relationship.

But this doesn’t mean you have to agree on everything. 

For example, when discussing the type of home we’d like to live in, my partner is all about modern designs. I’m much more into the classic rustic style. 

But that doesn’t matter. Because ultimately, we both want a home that’s filled with love, tranquility, and a few pets, of course. 

Put simply, it’s about aligning your core values and shared vision for the future

You might not see eye-to-eye on every minor detail, but don’t let it distract you from the fact that you both are moving in the same direction, hand in hand.

10) You feel safe

And finally, emotional safety is one of the most critical, yet often overlooked, aspects of the right relationship. 

It’s about expressing your deepest fears, your greatest hopes, and your silliest thoughts without the fear of being ridiculed or dismissed.

If your partner is your safe haven, the one you can bare your soul to, then you’re in the right relationship. 

It might not always feel comfortable exposing your vulnerabilities, but the strength of a relationship lies in its ability to hold them with care and respect.

Remember, relationships aren’t about perfection, but about love, understanding, and growth. 

If you see these signs in your relationship, even if it doesn’t always feel like it, you’re likely in the right place.

Trust yourself, trust your partner, and enjoy the beautiful journey of love together! 

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Picture of Tina Fey

Tina Fey

I've ridden the rails, gone off track and lost my train of thought. I'm writing for Ideapod to try and find it again. Hope you enjoy the journey with me.

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