9 signs you’re in a relationship with someone who doesn’t appreciate you

Love is a beautiful thing, right? It uplifts, inspires, and adds a dash of magic to the mundane. But what if that love is one-sided?


If you’re constantly feeling undervalued or unappreciated in your relationship, it’s time to take a step back and evaluate.

Could it be that you’re in a relationship with someone who doesn’t appreciate you?

You might be thinking, “No way, not me”, but sometimes, the signs are so subtle that you might not even realize it’s happening.

So, if you’re asking yourself “Am I being appreciated in my relationship?” this article is for you.

Get ready to dive into 9 telltale signs of being in a relationship with someone who doesn’t appreciate you. Trust me, recognizing them could be your first step towards finding the love and respect you truly deserve.

1) They rarely acknowledge your efforts

So, you’ve cooked their favorite meal, planned a surprise date, or simply made an effort to look extra sharp for them.

But here’s the rub.

Their response (or lack of it) leaves you feeling deflated. They barely notice the effort you’ve put in, let alone express appreciation.

Does this sound familiar?

This could be a red flag indicating that your partner doesn’t appreciate you. In a healthy relationship, both partners value each other’s efforts and express gratitude regularly. When this is missing, it might be time to have a serious talk.

2) You’re always the one initiating communication

This reminds me of a time in my life.

I was dating this guy, and I found that I was always the one initiating conversation. Whether it was planning our next date or just checking in with a simple “How’s your day?”, it always seemed to fall on me.

It wasn’t just about texting or making phone calls. Even in person, I felt like I was the driving force behind our conversations.

And let me tell you, it was exhausting.

But more importantly, it made me feel unappreciated, as if my need for connection was a one-way street.

If you’re finding yourself in a similar situation, it might be a sign that you’re with someone who doesn’t appreciate the value of your communication efforts.

3) Your achievements are brushed off

I’ll never forget this one incident.

I was beaming with joy after receiving a promotion at work – a promotion I had worked tirelessly to achieve. I couldn’t wait to share the news with my then-partner, expecting a celebration or at least a pat on the back.

But here’s what happened.

His response was a nonchalant, “That’s nice,” before he switched the topic to something else. It was as if my big achievement was nothing more than a tiny blip on his radar.

I felt deflated, unimportant, and frankly, unappreciated.

4) They don’t support your dreams

Everyone has dreams and aspirations, right?

But what happens when you share these dreams with your partner, and they dismiss or belittle them?

It’s hurtful, isn’t it?

If your partner consistently fails to support your dreams, it’s a clear indicator that they aren’t appreciating you. In a balanced relationship, both partners encourage each other’s ambitions and celebrate each other’s victories.

You deserve someone who believes in you and your dreams as much as you do.

5) They never seem to have time for you

Time is one of the most precious gifts we can give someone. It shows that we value them and their company.

However, when you’re in a relationship with someone who doesn’t appreciate you, they might not make time for you. You might find yourself constantly trying to fit into their schedule, while they rarely make an effort to fit into yours.

This can leave you feeling like you’re not a priority in their life. A healthy relationship requires mutual effort and time spent together. If your partner isn’t making time for you, it could be a sign that they don’t truly appreciate you.

6) They don’t consider your feelings

There was a time when I had an incredibly tough day at work. Coming home, I sought a listening ear, comforting words, maybe even a hug. Instead, my partner dismissed my feelings, insisting I was overreacting and should just ‘get over it.’

That moment stung.

It wasn’t just about that one challenging day; it was the realization that my feelings appeared insignificant to him.

That’s when I recognized he didn’t appreciate me as much as I had believed. So, I initiated a serious conversation to convey that everyone deserves a partner who values their emotions and offers comfort when needed.

Surprisingly, he admitted to neglect and promised to change. It dawned on me that effective communication is the key here.

7) They take more than they give

Relationships should be about give and take, a balance of sorts.

But what if you find yourself constantly giving and your partner just taking?

You’re the one always compromising, always understanding, always adjusting. But when it comes to them, there’s a lack of reciprocity.

This imbalance is a clear sign that they don’t appreciate you.

Remember, you deserve a relationship where your efforts are matched and your love reciprocated. Don’t settle for anything less.

8) They don’t make an effort to know you better

Getting to know someone on a deeper level takes time and effort. It involves asking questions, showing interest in their stories, and genuinely wanting to understand them better.

But if you’re in a relationship with someone who doesn’t seem interested in knowing you better, it could be a sign that they don’t appreciate you.

They might not ask about your day, your interests, or your past. They might not show curiosity about your thoughts or feelings.

This lack of interest in getting to know you is a red flag. It signifies a lack of appreciation for who you are as an individual. After all, how can someone truly appreciate you if they don’t make an effort to understand you?

9) They don’t make you feel loved

At the end of the day, the most telling sign that you’re in a relationship with someone who doesn’t appreciate you is how they make you feel.

Do they make you feel loved, cherished, and valued? Or do you often feel unappreciated, neglected, or taken for granted?

Love shouldn’t leave room for doubt. It shouldn’t make you question your worth or your place in someone’s life. If you find yourself constantly questioning if you are loved, it could be a stark indication that you’re not being appreciated.

Everyone deserves to be in a relationship where they feel truly loved and appreciated. Don’t settle for anything less.

Final thoughts

If you’ve found yourself nodding along to these signs, it’s possible you’re in a relationship with someone who doesn’t appreciate you.

But remember this, recognizing the problem is the first step towards change.

Change may not come easy, but it’s worth the effort. It could mean having a difficult conversation with your partner or seeking professional advice.

In some cases, it might even mean walking away from a relationship that no longer serves you.

The road ahead may be challenging, but it’s important to prioritize your self-worth. Always remember: You deserve to be appreciated and loved in the same measure that you appreciate and love others.

Picture of Isabella Chase

Isabella Chase

Isabella Chase, a New York City native, writes about the complexities of modern life and relationships. Her articles draw from her experiences navigating the vibrant and diverse social landscape of the city. Isabella’s insights are about finding harmony in the chaos and building strong, authentic connections in a fast-paced world.

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