13 signs you’re giving way too much and your partner is taking advantage of it

In the tango of relationships, finding the balance between give and take is crucial. 

But sometimes, you might find yourself giving more than you’re receiving. 

Are you in a one-sided relationship where you’re constantly drained, and your partner seems to take it for granted? 

Here are 13 subtle signs that you’re giving too much and your partner might be taking advantage of it. 

Let’s explore these unseen red flags to help you nurture a healthier, more balanced relationship.

1) You’re always the one to initiate communication

Does your phone feel like a one-way street, with you constantly reaching out and your partner only responding, rarely initiating? 

If you’re always the one to start conversations, plan dates, or even just check in, it might be a sign you’re giving too much.

Communication is the lifeblood of any relationship, and it should be a two-way street. 

If you’re constantly having to instigate, it can make you feel like you’re carrying the relationship single-handedly

Remember: It takes two to tango and if your partner isn’t putting in the effort to reach out, it’s time for a serious chat.

2) Your needs are consistently overlooked

Every person has needs—emotional, physical, and psychological. A healthy relationship respects and meets these needs. 

If your needs are consistently overlooked or dismissed, while your partner’s are prioritized, it’s a big red flag.

Yes, compromise is important in a relationship. But constant sacrifice without reciprocation is detrimental. 

It’s important to ensure your needs are also being met and that there’s a balance in consideration and care from both ends.

3) You feel exhausted after spending time with them

Time spent with your partner should leave you feeling invigorated, loved, and happy. 

But if you often find yourself feeling emotionally drained and tired after your interactions, it might be an indication that you’re giving too much.

In a balanced relationship, there’s an exchange of energy that rejuvenates both partners. 

If you’re constantly pouring out your energy without receiving anything in return, it can leave you feeling depleted. 

Listen to your body and emotions, they might be signaling that things are out of balance.

4) You’re always apologizing (even when it’s not your fault)

If “I’m sorry” has become your mantra, even when you’ve done nothing wrong, you might be in an imbalanced relationship. 

Constantly apologizing, especially when you’re not at fault, suggests that you’re taking on too much blame and responsibility.

Apologies should be meaningful and appropriate, not used as a tool to keep peace or appease an overly critical partner

If your partner is quick to blame you and slow to take responsibility, it’s time to reassess the dynamics of your relationship.

5) You’re afraid to express your true feelings

Feelings, both good and bad, are integral parts of a relationship. 

If you’re scared to express your true feelings because it might upset your partner or start a fight, it’s a sign you’re giving too much and not being treated right.

A healthy relationship encourages open and honest communication. 

Your feelings are valid and should be respected, not dismissed or ridiculed. 

Your partner should be someone you can confide in, not someone you’re afraid of.

6) Your partner makes you feel guilty for spending time with others

inconsiderate things men do in relationships that drive women crazy 13 signs you’re giving way too much and your partner is taking advantage of it

Does your partner guilt-trip you for spending time with your friends or family, or indulging in your hobbies without them? 

If so, it’s another sign of an imbalanced relationship.

Your partner should respect your individuality and the need for personal space and time. 

Your world shouldn’t revolve entirely around them, and you shouldn’t be made to feel guilty for nurturing other relationships and interests. 

If your partner can’t appreciate your autonomy, they might be taking advantage of your generosity and love.

7) Your achievements are downplayed

In a healthy, balanced relationship, partners celebrate each other’s achievements, big or small. 

If your partner habitually downplays or ignores your accomplishments, you may be giving too much in the relationship.

A partner who truly values you will share in your joy and uplift you. 

If you constantly find yourself downplaying your achievements to keep peace or avoid inciting jealousy, it’s a warning sign. 

Your accomplishments should be celebrated, not diminished or overlooked.

8) You feel like you’re walking on eggshells

Do you constantly worry about saying or doing the wrong thing, triggering an argument or hurtful comments? 

If you feel like you’re walking on eggshells, it’s a clear sign of imbalance.

A relationship should provide a safe space for expression and communication, not a battlefield where you’re always on high alert. 

You should be comfortable being yourself without fear of constant criticism or conflict.

9) You’re always making excuses for their behavior

If you find yourself constantly defending or making excuses for your partner’s behavior, especially to yourself, it’s time to reassess the relationship.

Rationalizing your partner’s actions or dismissing your feelings of unease are clear signs of imbalance. 

It’s important to remember that being in a relationship doesn’t mean turning a blind eye to unacceptable behavior. 

You deserve respect, and if your partner isn’t treating you right, no amount of excuses can justify it.

10) You’ve started neglecting your own health and wellbeing

Relationships should enhance your life, not drain it. 

If you’ve started neglecting your own health, physical or mental, due to the stresses of the relationship, it’s a glaring sign that you’re giving too much.

Your health and wellbeing should never be compromised. 

If your relationship is causing you to lose sleep, stress excessively, or neglect your physical health, it’s time to take a step back and prioritize your wellbeing.

11) Your boundaries are frequently disrespected

Boundaries are crucial in any relationship. If your partner regularly disregards your personal boundaries or makes you feel guilty for setting them, it’s a clear indication of imbalance.

A partner who respects you will also respect your boundaries and your need for personal space. 

Disrespect of boundaries is a sign of disregard for your comfort and autonomy.

12) They rarely express gratitude for your efforts

A thank you goes a long way. If your partner rarely shows appreciation for all the effort you put into the relationship, it’s another sign of imbalance.

Gratitude should be a natural part of a healthy relationship. 

A partner who values you will acknowledge and appreciate your efforts, not take them for granted.

13) You often feel unloved or unappreciated

The ultimate sign of giving too much in a relationship is feeling unloved or unappreciated

A healthy relationship should make you feel cherished, valued, and loved.

If you frequently feel taken for granted or if your efforts are met with indifference, it’s time to reassess the dynamics of your relationship. 

Remember: You deserve to feel loved and appreciated for who you are.

Navigating back to balance: How to stop giving too much

20 signs youre evolving into a caring and kind hearted person 03 13 signs you’re giving way too much and your partner is taking advantage of it

Prioritize your needs

Start by acknowledging your needs and giving them the importance they deserve. It’s not selfish, it’s self-care. 

Ensure that your physical, emotional, and mental needs are met.

Set clear boundaries

Communicate your boundaries clearly to your partner. These should be respected without exception. 

If your partner cannot respect them, it’s a clear sign they don’t respect you.

Learn to say no

It’s okay to say no if you’re feeling overwhelmed or if something doesn’t align with your values. 

Saying no can be empowering and can help you regain your balance.

Seek outside perspectives

Sometimes, we’re too close to the situation to see it clearly. Don’t hesitate to seek advice from trusted friends or a professional counselor.

Practice self-love

Remember that you are deserving of love, respect, and care. Spend time nurturing your relationship with yourself through hobbies, self-care routines, and personal growth.

Open communication

Have an open and honest conversation with your partner about your feelings. If they dismiss or ridicule your concerns, it may be time to reconsider the relationship.

Reevaluate the relationship

If you’ve communicated your feelings and things haven’t changed, it might be time to reassess the relationship. 

It’s better to be alone than in a relationship where you’re constantly feeling drained and unappreciated.

Hidden in plain sight: Why relationship imbalance often goes unnoticed

It’s a strange phenomenon, isn’t it? You might wonder, “How could I not see that I was being mistreated?” 

But it’s surprisingly easy for such mistreatment to fly under the radar, especially in relationships where feelings of love and affection can blur the lines of what’s healthy and what’s not.

This is often because the signs are subtle, and we’re conditioned to believe that love requires sacrifice. 

It’s like turning up the heat slowly on a pot of water with a frog inside. The changes are so gradual, the frog doesn’t realize it’s boiling until it’s too late.

I remember when I was in a relationship that took more than it gave. 

I was always the one to initiate communication, my needs were often overlooked, and I found myself feeling drained instead of invigorated. 

But it took a friend pointing out the imbalance for me to see it. 

I had dismissed the signs as normal relationship struggles or convinced myself that I was just being sensitive.

The truth is, imbalance and mistreatment can be subtle and insidious. 

But recognizing these signs is the first step toward reclaiming your self-worth and cultivating healthier relationships.

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Picture of Tina Fey

Tina Fey

I've ridden the rails, gone off track and lost my train of thought. I'm writing for Ideapod to try and find it again. Hope you enjoy the journey with me.

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