11 signs you’re becoming more comfortable with yourself and embracing who you are

Common short-term side effects of loving yourself include more laughter and happier thoughts.

But what about the long-term effects? Because the journey isn’t always sunshine and rainbows.

And having the giggles won’t always cut it.

Whether you’re looking for reasons to keep going, or want a check-list to look forward to, I’ve got you!

Here are 11 signs you’re becoming more comfortable with yourself and embracing who you are.

1) You’re spending more time alone

Being alone when you don’t like yourself will feel like you have the worst roommate within your own head.

They are critical of you, yet leave the dishes undone for a week.

But as you embrace yourself, the inner critic becomes quieter. Making room for you to find a best friend within you didn’t know was possible to have.

And it imbues you with the courage to evict that crappy roommate and stand up for yourself!

Less self-doubt means you don’t feel the need to compare yourself to anyone else. Or look for a guide to show you how to live life.

You’re simply happy being who you are, even if there’s no one to help you clean the bathroom. 

2) You’re making better quality connections

When you are uncomfortable in your own presence, it will be easier to surround yourself with people.

Even if they aren’t the greatest for you.

I think it’s why so many people prefer mindless companionship over genuine connections. 

And the problem with this phenomenon being so common is that it can keep us from questioning it.

It doesn’t always mean that you are attracted to “bad things.” 

Most of the time, it’s just that you’re disconnected from your intuition and don’t know what serves you.

So even if your intention of becoming more confident wasn’t to find better company, it may naturally happen.

3) You trust your intuition

Your intuition is that voice in your head (and gut) that tells you what serves you and doesn’t.

It’s like the only thing that might know you better than you know yourself. And it’s often blocked by external opinions, societal norms and low self-esteem.

So naturally, as you work through all those factors that make you feel lesser than, your intuition will become clearer.

Trusting your gut is also about learning how to sit with discomfort. Because going after what’s best for you isn’t always going to feel like it.

Sometimes, or a lot of times, it’s a risk!

But it’s the trust you have in yourself that pulls you through dark times.

4) You’re not relying on societal expectations

Or anyone’s expectations! 

But it’s worth noting the societal aspect because it’s what influences a lot of people’s personal choices. 

Sometimes without them being completely aware of it.

When you’re comfortable with yourself, not having control over your desires or awareness will be a nightmare.

Having these kinds of feelings might feel turbulent at times because you’re going against the grain. It’s totally normal to question yourself at first.

But really, it just means you have your priorities straight and you’re willing to fight for yourself.

And in case you need to hear it today, I get it so don’t stop!

5) You have your priorities straight

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Meaning you know what’s important to you, and aren’t afraid to stick to it.

There’s a type of stubbornness that is destructive, and then a type that preserves a person’s essence.

While there is definitely a blurry line in between, the point is that you take the time to define what everything means for yourself.

A clear indication of a person that has their priorities straight is someone who has control over their mind. Because that’s what determines how you spend your time and energy.

So as you improve your self-esteem, you’ll find that certain people, situations and thoughts don’t deserve a second thought.

Your time and energy are precious, finite resources – and they should be treated as such.

6) You don’t judge the path it took to get here

Your past choices are becoming easier to accept because you know they helped you get to where you are.

Your present emotions and thoughts don’t throw you off, because you know that how you deal with them is what defines your character.

Because bad days teach us how capable we are, and also show us what good days could be. 

Which makes it easier to embrace your desires and hopes for the future without doubting them!

All in all, embracing and loving yourself makes it easier to view yourself with compassion. And growing this skill will help you navigate life’s challenges.

It will also give you the gift of range – allowing yourself to be a contradiction without thinking yourself a mess for it.

You’re not a mess, just a human who likes being one.

7) You’re finding it easier to deal with anger

I wanted to put a spotlight on anger.

A lot of us weren’t taught how to process it – it’s sort of like the universal generational curse.

And because the world isn’t fair, certain groups of people have more freedom to express themselves than others.

When people are invalidated for their emotions, it doesn’t make them feel any less. In fact, it does the exact opposite with the addition of shame.

On the other hand, the people who are “allowed” to express anger do it in a way that’s destructive!

So how is anger supposed to be processed? Well it’s different for everyone, but it starts with sitting with it instead of reacting to it.

Because anger is what we feel when we need stronger boundaries or self-advocacy


8) Standing up for yourself feels like second nature

Setting boundaries and standing up for yourself is probably the hardest part about loving yourself. 

It’s what will directly challenge your need for approval from others. But it’s also what will exit you from the tiresome world of needing to be liked.

Instead, you’ll enter the world of being understood, loved and respected.

When you’re in limbo living on someone else’s ideals, you won’t grow. External elements, like your finances or material possessions might.

But you won’t. 

And it might be comfortable to live by someone else’s authority, which mimics happiness.

But as you become more rooted in yourself, there will be areas of your life that require you to confront and check they are in alignment.

So healthy confrontation and learning how to express yourself is something that can trigger change in your life by offering you clarity.

Good news is, it’s a practice that gets easier. And even better news, you’ll begin to forge relationships where everyone feels seen.

9) You feel passionate towards life again

Being comfortable and mistaking it with happiness won’t kill you. But it is a sign that you lack passion in your life.

So as you repair your inner world, you’ll also regain your passion for it.

This means you’ll want to try new things that you had previously thought yourself not enough for. 

Or you might crave more time in nature because who’s more passionate than Mother Nature?

Wherever it takes you, passion is what helps us feel grounded in the present without fearing loss of it.

In a world where time and money are thought of as the same thing, valuing passion is like learning how to drive a manual instead of an automatic.

And then choosing to live in the mountains.

Sure, it’s more work for you but the views you’ll get to see are crazy – so I’d say it’s worth it.

10) It’s getting easier to collaborate with others

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Meaning new ideas and projects if you’re creative!

I’ve already touched on how you’ll find better people suited for you. But life is more than the people you consider close.

Along with learning how to communicate more effectively and having a renewed taste for life’s zest, it’s only natural for your idea of community to evolve.

So the idea of collaboration here can apply to pretty much everything. 

From the way you talk to the cashier, to how you seek romantic relationships. To how you relate to people, to the way you allow them to be themselves.

Sort of like your attachment style is becoming more secure! You’ll become as warm as you are free.

11) You feel like you found your life’s purpose

It’s a feeling more than a mandate you put across your chest like a name tag.

Although it could be.

Everyone has their own take as to why any of us are here. Feeling like you have a sense of purpose can be daunting to announce.

But if you know, then you know.

And a sense of purpose is something that deserves to evolve and grow with you. Which you can only do if you acknowledge it.

So share it if it feels right, or don’t. 

Just know that it takes courage to have the willingness to understand the vastness of life and ponder those kinds of big questions.

A big part of self-love is repairing your relationship to control

And wanting control isn’t inherently bad. 

Think of it as taking your power back and instead of hoarding it, you find ways to grow and maintain that sense of empowerment.

It’s all about how you spend it, because there’s nothing wrong with making profitable investments.

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Picture of Tina Fey

Tina Fey

I've ridden the rails, gone off track and lost my train of thought. I'm writing for Ideapod to try and find it again. Hope you enjoy the journey with me.

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