Martha Croissy
In the world we live in, being confident can mean the difference between doors of opportunity opening or shutting right in front of you.
Despite our best efforts to attain and grow in confidence, life happens, and lingering doubts can drag us right back into the mud.
Wondering if you’re becoming more confident?
Here are 12 signs that your self-confidence is growing:
1) You’re gladly accepting compliments
Compliments from your friends, family, or even strangers imply that other people are taking note of something outstanding about you.
It might be your sense of style, passion, elegance, or significant life accomplishments.
Sadly, if your confidence is lagging, even well-meaning compliments can be a tad uncomfortable, as this study published by the Harvard Business Review observes.
That was in the past:
If you now find yourself basking in compliments, it could be an unmistakable sign that your stock of self-worth is rising.
Keep going!
2) You appreciate yourself more
When compliments from others are not forthcoming, you may think you’re doing nothing worth mentioning. Let’s be honest. How many times do we compliment other people?
With just about everyone living in their own small world, seeing the good in others might be the least of our worries.
I’ve got news for you:
Appreciating yourself means you no longer look for approval from anyone. You have dismantled the low limits you have set for yourself in the past.
You are good enough, with or without external affirmations.
3) Your relationships are rocking
The health of our relationships reflects our own mental status. One study notes that people with high self-confidence generally have better social relationships.
Going into a relationship with low self-esteem and mental baggage definitely leads to toxic relationships. Leaving behind past heartbreaks and healing from past pains shows in how we relate with others.
Be it at the workplace or in the family, self-confidence allows you to be your best self. You are neither obsessed with asserting control over others nor are you controlled by them.
You also become considerate of other people’s needs, are more respectful of their opinions, and are always ready to admit mistakes.
In essence, self-confidence transforms your mindset and perception of others. You know what value you bring to a relationship.
4) You’re taking responsibility for your circumstances
Sky-high self-confidence notwithstanding, sometimes things may not go as we would like. How you react to negative circumstances says a lot about your self-esteem.
If you’re now taking things in stride and taking responsibility in different situations rather than passing blame, it could be a sure sign you are growing in confidence.
Your less confident self might have deflected blame and held others responsible. While this may seem like an easier path, it denies you an opportunity to learn and grow.
Confidence and control are two sides of the same coin. Taking responsibility means you’re in better control of situations.
And more confident too!
5) You’re a better learner
Life is a learning journey, and no one has a monopoly on knowledge.
Having the right level of confidence where you are neither too arrogant nor narcissistic is the sweet spot we all strive for.
When you start embracing new knowledge and pondering new lessons, it’s an indication that you’re in touch with your weaknesses and are eager to better yourself.
Learning also shows you have an open mind that is ready to think and perceive things differently given new information. You’re ready to discard old beliefs, outdated models and flow with the current.
6) You embrace success
Low self-confidence makes it harder for us to celebrate our successes. Instead of appreciating our efforts, we put them down to chance or luck.
Rather than seeing the bright side of victory, we concentrate more on the imperfections, the failings, and the what-ifs.
If you’re becoming your own cheerleader, chances are that you’re becoming more confident in your abilities. You already know how much effort you have put into the process, and you’re not ready to have anything or anyone steal your sunshine.
The successes don’t have to be huge or record-breaking. According to research by Teresa Amabile in ‘The Power of Small Wins’, people who celebrate their small achievements enhance their motivation and boost their confidence.
7) You’re living more in the present
We all have our pasts, some of which we wish to forget and others we wish we could relive. While our pasts, good or bad, contribute to who we are, living there can deny us the joys of today and hope for tomorrow.
Getting over your past and living in the present is a sign that you have outgrown your failures. You believe that no matter how low you sink or how high you fly, you have a life to live now and a future to prepare for tomorrow.
Forgetting your regrets and not feeling sorry for yourself shows you’re confident about putting things right. It opens up a future of possibilities with you in the driving seat.
8) You’re no longer comparing yourself
“If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself” —Desiderata
Comparison not only steals your joy but also dwindles your confidence. In the age of social media flaunting, you’re likely to find comparisons everywhere you look.
If you’re gradually becoming more contented with who you are and with what you have or can do, chances are you’re doing better in terms of confidence.
When you are no longer using other people’s standards to measure up your life, you are definitely leaving the comparison rat race.
Remember, your only competitor should be the best version of yourself, not cheesy social media shares.
9) FOMO is the least of your worries
Speaking of social media, we have all felt the urge to share a sneak peek of our lives with our social media friends (and strangers) for likes and follows.
When was the last time you posted something on these platforms? For most people, Fear of Missing Out is real.
Personally, I am getting used to scrolling past other people’s posts rather than posting my own stories and photos.
It may seem innocuous, but posting less on social media may actually mean you’re getting off the ‘likes’ bandwagon. You no longer feel obliged to share your wins to get a stamp of approval.
Posting less may also mean you’re feeling more secure about your vulnerabilities, so you don’t need external assurances.
10) You are healthier all-round
When you’re low on self-confidence, you’re likely to be more anxious and stressed. You may have poor sleeping habits and occasionally pop pills to afford a cozy sleep.
Poor mental health is also likely to lead to poor physical health.
If you’re taking fewer sleeping pills and your body is feeling relaxed, you may be growing more confident.
A strong sense of self-worth can lead to peace of mind, higher energy levels, and more productivity at work.
Heck, you are also likely to have a great sexual life!
11) Self-love is part of your life
With self-confidence soaring along with great mental and physical health, the last thing you need is to go back to the old ways.
When I made the decision to cut down on carbs, it looked like a matter of time before I went back to my bad habits. And with a horde of carb-lovers on my neck, there was no way I was cutting that craving for long.
But the benefits of my decision were so clear to me. I regained my pre-birth body weight and felt great. It’s been three years since I took the plunge, and I’m never going back.
You know you’re becoming more confident when you allow self-care habits to become a part of your daily routine rather than something forced on you.
From regular meditation to practicing yoga, reading, proper nutrition, and physical exercises, you’re taking your well-being seriously.
12) You’re surrounding yourself with supportive people
My dieting goals have been greatly impacted by my friends. While they have occasionally dangled a slice of pizza my way, they have always been supportive and understanding.
All the while, I have also lost some friends. My former self would not have let me cut off my buddies. Instead, I would have bent over backwards to accommodate their desires.
If you’re dropping erstwhile friends, it could be a sign that you are getting better at prioritizing your own needs. In short, your self-confidence is growing!
Final thoughts
Your self-confidence impacts every aspect of your life. From your career, mental and physical health, relationships, spirituality to your innermost beliefs.
The ups and downs of life, along with how you’ve interacted with people, may have rocked your self-confidence a great deal.
The good news is that you can rebuild your self-confidence one step at a time.
And you don’t need a mountain of evidence to know that you are moving in the right direction.
The above subtle signs are indicators that you are getting there.
Slowly, but surely.
