Have you fallen head over heels for someone? Perhaps you think they’re amazing in every possible way (and could actually be that special soulmate you’ve been searching for).
But there’s an issue.
You desperately want to know if they feel the same about you!
Because it’s not always so obvious.
If you’re anything like me, they’ll still be some niggling doubts in your mind (despite them confessing their undying love for you).
Well, good news!
Did you know that there are actually science-backed signals you can look for, to prove they’ve also caught the love bug?
See if you can recognize these 10 signs that prove your partner truly loves you (according to psychology).
1) They’re all ears (whatever the topic of conversation)
Psychology suggests that listening is a clear act of love.
But let me get one thing straight.
I’m talking about active listening here. So, being in the moment (with no distractions), asking follow-up questions, and actually picking up what you’re putting down.
Body language is also a sign of active listening. Things like eye contact, nodding, smiling, and sitting upright facing you.
Active listening is NOT mumbling “oh wow” while simultaneously watching TV over your shoulder!
Here’s the thing.
When your partner truly listens to you, it shows they’re genuinely interested in your life. In other words, they care about you, your opinions, and your life goals.
But there’s more.
Another reason why they actively listen to you could be because…
2) They find your jokes hilarious
You’ve probably heard this before.
But humor (and the ability to make each other laugh) consistently ranks highly when discussing partner compatibility traits.
So, if your partner can’t get enough of your unique sense of humor, chances are they’ve fallen for you.
Here’s the psychology behind it:
Partaking in a satisfying belly laugh with your partner makes you feel closer to one another. You’ll share special moments and it’ll make your time together more enjoyable.
Humor is a great way to bond and lays the foundation for true love to flourish.
Laughing is also a great way to relieve stress. Plus it can immediately put you at ease and make you feel secure.
This all adds up to (you’ve guessed it), falling in love!
And it works both ways too.
So if your partner not only appreciates your jokes but also returns the favor and seriously gives you the giggles, it’s a telltale sign that you’re both smitten!
3) They’re comfortable with silences
Let’s take a step back.
Because love isn’t always about cracking top-tier jokes or actively listening to one another.
In fact, being present and content, in complete silence, can also be a sign of true love.
When you boil it down, embracing silence together not only shows you’re both comfortable and secure but also that you can read the room and synchronize with each other’s mood.
In other words, your partner doesn’t feel the need to fill silences with small talk. There’s nothing to prove.
They just know.
And psychology backs this up.
Imagine the opposite scenario, such as awkwardly bumping into a colleague in the lift (that you don’t particularly get on with). You’d probably feel the need to fill the silence by talking about the weather or your plans for the weekend. This kind of mundane chitchat serves to mask the uncomfortable scenario you’re both in.
This is exactly what you DON’T need to do when you truly love someone.
4) They’re your rock (and happy to be)
A popular idea is that successful relationships always have a rock and a kite.
The rock is the grounded one. Dependant, consistent, and reliable. Always there for you. Whereas the kite wants to fly high, follow their dreams, and well, be a little less grounded. You get the idea, the rock allows the kite to fly.
But what we (and the psychologists) are really talking about here, is support.
Ever heard the phrase “Actions speak louder than words”?
When your partner provides you with emotional, physical, and even financial support, they’re demonstrating to you just how much they really care.
They genuinely want you to succeed so are willing to give up their own precious time to help you.
Whether it’s preparing a delicious meal, listening to your problems, or giving you a back massage after a hectic day, being your rock shows that they truly love you.
5) They make an effort (with your friends and family)
To quote the Spice Girls:
“If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends.”
Despite coming from a pop group (with no psychology degree in sight) this lyric actually has a ton of meaning when it comes to falling in love.
Let me explain.
It emphasizes the value of long-standing friendships over romantic relationships and the significance of acceptance.
As California-based psychologist Andra Brosh states:
“At the end of the day, if someone wants to be in a relationship with someone they love, having a relationship with their friends on some level is important.”
So if you get the impression your partner doesn’t quite click with your circle of friends, but always puts in the effort, it’s probably because they truly love you.
They’re willing to give it a go and compromise because they know it’ll make you happy.
6) They involve you in decisions
Now, it doesn’t have to be absolutely everything (that would just be annoying). Imagine, they can’t even order a drink at the bar without running it by you!
No. I’m talking about more significant decisions.
Plans for the weekend, how to deal with a tricky social situation, or even where to live.
The science shows that if your partner actively involves you in decisions, they not only care more but you’ll also have a better functioning relationship.
So it’s a win-win.
And ultimately comes down to them visualizing a long and happy future with you (because if they didn’t, they probably wouldn’t involve you).
In other words…
7) They show you a ton of respect
When you think about it, this one pretty much sums it up.
Respect is the cornerstone of love. Without it, is love even possible?
And the science backs it up.
In fact, psychologists have concluded that respect predicts relationship satisfaction better than any other measurement.
So if your partner simply respects you, it’s probably the single most important thing they can do to show you that they truly love you.
Speaking of which, one big example of respect is…
8) They’re honest
If you catch your partner lying, cheating, and manipulating, wave the red flag because chances are they don’t truly love you.
Honesty isn’t only the best policy, it also improves the chances of having a lasting successful relationship.
Time and time again, psychological studies have shown couples who don’t lie report improved interactions and smoother communication. One study even shows better overall health from being honest.
When we think about being honest, we automatically think about not telling lies.
But being honest can mean so much more.
I’m talking about sharing vulnerabilities or personal concerns with your partner in a completely transparent way.
This level of honesty can supercharge your relationship and have a far bigger positive impact than simply not telling the odd white lie.
Honesty and transparency also foster trust, which takes us nicely to our next point.
9) They completely trust you
Now this might depend on your history.
For example, how you’ve behaved in the past.
But unless you’ve given them a reason to be suspicious, complete trust is a sign of a mature relationship (and a sign they truly love you) according to psychologists.
It’s not always easy (depending on their self-esteem and previous experiences), but at some point, they’ll have to let go (and risk being hurt) for the relationship to work.
And when you reach this point, it’s a beautiful thing.
In contrast, an immature or troubled relationship involves a ton of jealousy. I’m talking about them constantly checking your private messages or giving you a lengthy interrogation if you come home late.
Well, maybe they don’t actually love you if they can’t trust you.
10) They don’t just want physical intimacy
Don’t get me wrong.
Being intimate with your partner is important and can strengthen the bond you have together (plus actually relieve stress and make you feel more confident).
But it’s not everything.
According to psychology, love and lust are distinctly different. Lust puts an emphasis on sexual attraction while love is both passionate and compassionate.
And if you suspect it’s all your partner wants, chances are they don’t really love you (it’s more like lust).
For example, if most of your time together is spent in the bedroom, and they have little interest in your hobbies, goals, or life outside of this, it’s not love. Perhaps they leave quickly in the morning and you struggle to have meaningful conversations (they even become awkward).
True love supersedes physical attraction. When you grow older, the physical side of things may slide, but true love won’t.