Sometimes, it can be hard to tell whether or not your ex is still in love with you — and if he/she has lost interest.
However, there are many signs that can make this a little easier.
Here’s our list of 13 undeniable signs your ex doesn’t want to lose you (and might still love you!).
1) They show up at the most unlikely of moments
Think about this for a moment:
Have you ever found your ex appearing at the most random of moments? Maybe they just happened to be there to lend you a helping hand! Maybe they were simply taking a stroll and stumbled upon you.
Or maybe they showed up at your place of work.
But if this happens repeatedly and they never seem to be able to keep away from you, this might be a sign that they are interested in you again.
For example, you might find them popping up at random occasions — like a party, a reunion, or just your daily commute to work.
They might even show up at your workplace…
2) They stay in contact
I bet most of us have noticed this, but it’s something that many of us don’t really consider.
Even when they’ve broken up with you, you might find that your ex is still in contact with you.
They might call from time to time, or keep in touch via text message.
They might even begin to check up on how you’re doing.
If they do, this is usually a good sign that they are still interested in you and want to stay close to you. Even when they break up with someone, most people normally still want to be in contact. After all, staying in contact is a much easier way of keeping tabs on the person that you care about.
3) They make an effort to be respectful of your boundaries and needs
When you break up with someone, it can be easy to feel angry and resentful.
Sometimes we say things that we don’t mean…
Sometimes we blame the other person for everything wrong in our lives.
But if your ex actually makes a genuine effort to abide by your boundaries and needs, and at the same time treat you with respect.
It usually means that they still care.
You might be wondering why this matter comes into play, but it’s important to note that the relationship is usually more important than the other person. If your ex has made an effort to be respectful of your boundaries and needs, then there’s a good chance that they care about you — and want to work towards making things work.
4) You catch them looking at old pictures of the two of you
Just the thought of catching your ex looking at old pictures of the two of you can be enough to make your heart skip a beat.
It can lead to a few questions:
- Is he or she just reminiscing because of the breakup?
- Or… is something more going on here?
And the good news is:
If your ex is looking at old pictures of the two of you, then it usually means that they still care about you. After all, why else would they want to keep a picture of you around?
I know, it can be hard to use this occasion as a reliable sign that your ex doesn’t want to lose you. But the last time I spoke to a relationship coach from Relationship Hero, this was exactly something they asked me about my ex.
I was surprised by their question but then, when I met my ex, I noticed that they carried old pictures of me and themselves.
That’s how I found out that my ex wanted to get back with me.
So, if you also want to receive more insights about the signs your ex wants to get back with you, maybe you should also reach out to them and get some personalized advice.
5) They’re vulnerable with you
According to the book “The Art of Love” by Andreas Wecker, it has been shown that when someone is truly in love, they will show signs of being vulnerable with you.
How?
Well, in the moment of being vulnerable, they will “give you a piece of themselves”, to let you know that they are genuinely willing to let you in.
They might show this by saying they are going through a rough time. They might say they have trust issues and ask if there is anything that you can do to help them overcome this issue. Or perhaps they will display some signs of wanting to be vulnerable with you:
- They will talk about their emotions
- They will allow you to peek into their “friend zone” — as long as it is for a moment’s notice
- They will talk about problems that they are facing
You might also find that your ex is opening up more, and willing to discuss issues with you. If this happens, then know that they want to get back together. (This isn’t always a good thing though!)
6) They genuinely seem happy for you
Imagine this:
You’ve just let your ex know that you’ve succeeded at landing a new job. Your ex genuinely seems happy for you and tells you that they are proud of you.
You can’t wait to tell them about the new house that you’ve just bought, so you tell them all about it — but your ex is genuinely happy for you and congratulates you on your big purchase.
If this happens, then this means that your ex still cares about you. This may also be a new point of attraction for your ex towards you.
Now, that doesn’t mean that they’ll immediately try to get back together. But it does mean that they care about you; that they want to work on the relationship and make it work.
7) They still want to help you with tasks
When you break up with someone, it can be easy to start thinking that the other person doesn’t want to be a part of your life anymore.
This is why people sometimes refuse to help you with chores or tasks anymore, even though they might still care about you.
But if your ex is still willing to do chores and tasks for you, it means that they still want to be a part of your life.
So, here’s the deal:
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Don’t go overboard on this one.
If your ex is still willing to help you with tasks, then go ahead and let them. But don’t expect them to do more than they did before the breakup.
If you ask your ex to also do chores and tasks for you after the breakup, then that can make them feel a bit uncomfortable and eager to get away from it all.
8) They offer emotional support when needed
When you’re experiencing a rough time, it can be hard to know where to go for emotional support.
What if you try to talk about it with your ex, and your ex then they are really supportive at all? What if they eventually just turn things around to make it about them?
If you find out that your ex is supportive when you need it, then this usually means that they care about you.
I previously mentioned the concept of “being vulnerable” when it comes to relationships. If your ex is showing signs of wanting to be vulnerable with you during a rough time, then it can mean that they care about you.
This doesn’t mean that they’ll try to get back together or fix things, but it does say a lot about their feelings and intentions.
It gets better if…
You still have that spark, and you’re interested in getting back together. If you can bring the spark back, then it will make it easier to know if they care about you or not.
9) They’re still jealous when it comes to your exes or other people
You may know that your ex still cares about you when you hear them show their jealousy in the form of:
- Commenting on the things that you post that are related to a past relationship (in a positive or negative way).
- Having a few catty comments when they see you interacting with someone new.
- Being jealous when their friends meet your ex, or if you hang out with people that are different from them.
From time to time, they may want you to get back together. And this is usually not because they’re jealous. It’s more like they want to make sure that you’re really serious about it in the first place.
10) They remember important dates and times in your life
Another sign that your ex still cares about you is if they can remember important dates and times in your life that you shared together.
This might include:
- The first time you met
- The last time you spoke with them (before the breakup)
- The last time that they saw you before the breakup
- Your anniversary (if you are married)
- The first time that you told them that you loved them
Even if this is only a small part of your relationship, it still says a lot about their intentions toward you.
If your ex can remember these memories for you, then it means that they do still care about you.
Even if…
No matter how many signs indicate that your ex still cares about you, know that there will be times when they don’t show this. They may have a lot going on in their life that they can’t really talk about.
But here’s the kilker:
Don’t expect them to be 100% consistent with the signs. It’s not natural for people to always be in touch and express their feelings toward you.
If you get back together with your ex, then expect things to change over time. Expect them to show different signs at different times — or even at the same time!
Relationships are unpredictable, and can’t always follow a pattern of behavior. So, hang onto some hope that they just might come back.
11) They bring up old topics of conversation
Remember what it was like when you first started a relationship with your ex? You might have shared a lot of common interests and values that you both cared about.
It’s possible that your ex might bring up some of these conversations when you start talking again. They might bring these topics up on their own or remind you about them.
But also keep in mind that, besides the reason they still love you, there are also reasons like:
- They want to test those values and see if you still hold onto them
- They want to know that your feelings haven’t changed too much since the breakup.
- They want to make sure there are no major changes in your life that made you think less of them.
- They want to know that you still care about them (even if they feel like they don’t deserve it).
- They want to get a hold of that spark again!
- They want to make sure that you’re not just doing this because they broke up with you.
- You might have some new or different interests that are interesting and fun to them. This could be something like Bicycling, hiking, or selling vintage clothes.
In a word: Don’t try to figure out their reason for bringing up this stuff. Just go with the flow. If it’s something important to you, then you know that they still care about you.
12) They don’t try removing your stuff from their life
This is a really big one.
In most breakups, the other person tries to remove as much of their stuff from the ‘partner’’s life as possible.
This is because they want you to feel like you no longer matter — and that they don’t want to be a part of your life anymore. Of course, this depends on how much you matter to them.
But what if your ex still has stuff that belongs to you in their life?
They still have your pictures. They still have things that are related to you. And they might even keep your stuff in one of their rooms — where it’s easy for them to find!
If your ex still has things that are related to you in their life, then know that the relationship is still important and meaningful to them.
This usually means that they do care about you — and that they want to get back together.
13) They get sad when talking about the future without you in it for some reason
When you’re in a relationship with someone, there’s always something they want to do together — or something they want to get. Maybe they want to go on vacation together. Or maybe they want to buy a house.
But when your relationship ends, you might lose the chance to do some of those things because you no longer have the other person in your life. And this can make them sad.
They may also feel like they have to work harder to get what they want in life. Or they may just stay stuck in their comfort zone and stop working toward their goals — because there’s no longer someone that motivates or inspires them.
This also has some negative effects on your ex, which could cause them to start thinking about ending their relationship with you. Without realizing it, this could happen sooner than ever before.
Final thoughts
Hopefully, with these 13 signs, you’ve been able to see that your ex still cares about you. Remember that you still have the chance to get back together.
If you genuinely want your ex back, you need the help of a professional.
I’ve mentioned Brad Browning throughout this article – he’s the best at helping couples move past their issues and reconnect on a genuine level.
His tried and tested methods won’t just re-spark your ex’s interest in you, but they’ll also help you avoid making the same mistakes you made in the past.
So if you really want a shot at getting back together with your ex for good, check out his excellent free video below.