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25 undeniable signs your boss likes you romantically (and what to do about it)

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It’s generally flattering to find out that someone likes you romantically.

However, finding out that your boss likes you romantically is a whole other story. It may make you feel uncomfortable to find out that they like you and it can put you in a very awkward position.

So if your boss has been acting strange and you think it’s because they are interested in you romantically, here’s a list to know for sure – followed by advice on what to do about it.

So let’s get started with 25 undeniable signs your boss likes you romantically:

1) They give you preferential treatment

When your boss starts giving you special treatment that other employees don’t get, it may be because they like you.

This preferential treatment can be in the form of:

  • Giving you better and more meaningful projects – the ones that everyone is fighting over
  • Giving you more praise
  • Allowing you to take breaks at the office more frequently
  • Letting you go home early even if there’s work to be done
  • Putting the blame on your colleagues when things go south on joint projects and letting you get off scot-free
  • Giving you days off for little things – like when your pet is sick

So if you notice your boss is giving you special attention and putting a lot of pressure on you to do even better than usual – then it could mean they have feelings for you.

2) They confide in you

Have you noticed that your boss seems to trust you more than the other employees?

It could be because they like you romantically.

What do I mean?

Well, for example:

Sometimes they might ask you to check on a project or ask for your opinion regarding a certain situation.

They’ll tell you about any problems that the company may be facing – such as a bad sales record for a certain month or that they will have to let some people go for financial reasons.

They’ll tell you about what competitors are doing that is making things harder for the business, etc.

Or they’ll tell you about a merger but to keep it hush-hush, “Nobody must find out for another month!”

They may even start confiding to you about non-work-related matters, such as problems that they’re having in their personal life.

In a nutshell:

If your boss confides in you more than other employees, it could be because they have feelings for you.

3) They promise you a great future at the company

If your boss promises you a great future at the company, it could be because they like you romantically.

For example:

  • Promising to bring up your name to their boss when it comes to promotions
  • Promising to give you more responsibility on joint projects with other employees
  • Promising to make sure that all the right people know how much of an asset you are to the company, etc.

You might hear, “You’ll have plenty of opportunities to advance here” or “I’ll see that once you’ve proven yourself, you get a raise and a promotion.”

Basically, they want you to feel that they know how special you are, and at the same time that they have the power to help your career soar.

Sure, you have goals you want to achieve, but, this is not the way.

So, what does it take to build a life filled with exciting opportunities and passion-fueled adventures?

Most of us hope for a life like that, but we feel stuck, unable to achieve the goals we wishfully set at the start of each year.

I felt the same way until I took part in Life Journal. Created by teacher and life coach Jeanette Brown, this was the ultimate wake-up call I needed to stop dreaming and start taking action.

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If you’re ready to start living the life you’ve always dreamt of, you need to check out Jeanette’s advice. Who knows, today could be the first day of your new life.

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4) They often schedule private or late-night meetings

Does your boss seem to think that it’s okay to meet with you in private?

You know what I’m talking about. They’ll often ask you to stay late after working hours for a private meeting.

They may even schedule a late-night meeting over dinner.

Or – and I know this sounds crazy – they might ask you to come along on a business trip – just the two of you!

Why?

Because they want to spend more time with you.

If your boss never does this for the other employees – then it’s a sign something is up.

So if your boss often arranges to meet with you in private, it could be because they like romantically.

5) Frequently compliment you, and not just about your work

Does your boss compliment you often?

They keep telling you how great you are at your work and say things like, “Wow, can’t believe how quickly you solved that problem! What would we do with you?” – even when what you did was just a normal part of your job, nothing especially difficult or challenging.

And that’s not all!

It’s not just about your work, but also about how good you look, how well you’re dressed, your great sense of style, your amazing taste in music or art or whatever.

They’ll tell you how smart and accomplished you are.

If you feel that you’re getting a lot of compliments in comparison to your co-workers, something is definitely up.

You see, if your boss frequently compliments you, even where there’s no need for any kind of praise or approval, it could be another sign that they like you romantically.

6) They give you gifts

Hey, everybody likes a nice gift – myself included.

But there usually needs to be an occasion for a gift – especially in the workplace.

Does your boss have a habit of giving you gifts?

Now, I’m not talking about Christmas presents along with the rest of the staff or employee of the month cups.

I’m talking about gifts just for you.

It could be a small thing, like a bottle of wine or a plant.

Or it could be something more substantial, like tickets to an event or a gift certificate for an expensive restaurant.

If coming into work to find a box of heart-shaped chocolates or two-dozen roses waiting for you on your desk makes you feel uncomfortable – trust me, I know the feeling.

If your boss singles you out and gives you gifts – it’s another sign that they’re attracted to you.

7) They pay extra attention to you

Have you noticed that your boss singles you out from the rest of the employees?

It could be in the form of compliments, gifts, and attention.

Or it could be in the form of requests for your opinion or ideas – even when they don’t ask others for theirs.

Maybe, one day at lunch, instead of eating with other employees in the company cafeteria, your boss insists on going out for lunch with just you.

The bottom line is that if you feel like you’re getting extra attention from the boss – irrespective of whether or not you deserve it, and your co-workers don’t seem to be getting any – it’s another sign that they like romantically.

8) They flirt with you

Now, this one might seem obvious, but if your boss is flirting with you, it’s because they’re interested in you.

Often though, people try to ignore the signs because the idea of their boss flirting with them freaks them out.

They’ll tell themselves that their boss is just being friendly.

  • Have you ever noticed that your boss has a habit of talking about you in suggestive terms?
  • Have they asked you out for lunch or coffee?
  • Do they try to make physical contact – a hand squeezing your shoulder or a tap on the knee perhaps?
  • Do their eyes twinkle as they talk to you?
  • Or maybe they’ve straight up made a pass at you.

Look at the signs – if your boss is openly flirting with you, you’ll know.

9) You can feel it in your gut

Ok, so if you’re not sure whether or not your boss is in love with you, just stop trying to rationalize their behavior.

Take a step back, relax, and ask yourself:

  • Does your gut feeling tell you that something is up?
  • Do you feel that something is different with your boss – something is there that wasn’t there before?
  • Does their behavior seem normal to you?
  • Do they say and do things just to make you happy?
  • Do work-related topics suddenly turn personal?

If you can feel that there’s something different about your relationship with your boss – then you’re probably right.

Follow your gut, it’s seldom wrong.

10) They’re always asking for your opinion (even on matters you don’t know much about)

Now, if your boss is asking for your opinion on something you don’t know much about, it could be because they want to make you feel important.

If they constantly ask you for your advice on how to solve issues at work that are way above your pay grade – and asking for your opinion on things that don’t really concern you – then there’s a good chance that it’s not because of your expertise, but because they’re romantically interested in you.

Think about it:

Why else would your boss ask about financial advice from you when you’re a graphic designer?

11) They invite you to hang out together outside of work

Not only does your boss want to spend time with you after work, but they invite you to hang out in the evenings or on weekends!

I mean, WTF? Am I right?

If your boss invites you to hang out with them outside of work, it could be because they want to show you that they’re cool and interesting.

It can also be a sign that they want to spend some one-on-one time with you and get to know you better.

Basically, if your boss invites you out for drinks, dinner, or a small gathering – it’s another obvious sign that they like you.

12) They start to pay extra attention to their appearance at work

Is your boss parading around the office in new outfits like they’re in a fashion show?

You know what I mean – they suddenly wear fancy clothes or do their hair differently.

It’s like they’ve had a make-over.

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They may even start wearing stronger perfumes hoping that you’ll be attracted to their scent!

And have you noticed – is that a gold watch? – they’re so into accessories now.

If – in addition to some other signs mentioned in this article – your boss starts to dress differently and really take care of their appearance, it’s probably because they want you to notice them.

They want to be sure that you like what you see.

13) They remember everything you’ve done or said

If your boss somehow manages to remember everything you’ve ever said or done, something is up.

What am I talking about?

Unless you’re their only employee, they’re not gonna be able to remember that amount of information for every employee.

Let’s face it, in big companies, bosses can’t always remember people’s names let alone every little thing about them.

Which means that there’s something that sets you apart.

So, if your boss has a very good memory when it comes to you, it’s probably another sign that they are interested in you romantically

14) They like to share inside jokes with you

Did you ever consider that your boss might be using humor to form a special bond with you?

I’m talking about sarcasm, self-depreciation jokes, and – of course – inside jokes!

If your boss likes to share inside jokes with you, it means that they want to keep their relationship with you unique and special.

The fact that this is something that’s just between the two of you and doesn’t include anyone else is their way of saying, “I care about you.”

15) They call or text you outside of work

And I mean for no particular reason…

Ask yourself why your boss would call or text you outside of work.

Why would they invade your private time if there’s no work-related emergency?

I mean, unless you’re friends with your boss, it’s hard to think of a reason why they would be calling you outside of work if they didn’t like you.

It’s obvious that they would like to know you outside the office and that they would like this to be more than just a working relationship.

Which means that they are interested in you romantically.

16) They tell you about their private life

There aren’t that many reasons why a boss would tell you – their employee – about their private life.

Ok, so maybe they have nobody to talk to and you seem like a good listener… That actually happened to me some years ago. I felt like I was assigned the role of in-office “shrink” that I wasn’t quite equipped to take on.

But the fact that they’re opening up shows that they want to build a relationship with you. Even if it’s just some kind of office friendship.

I guess if they don’t show any other signs of being interested in you, I wouldn’t make much of it.

But, if there are other signs on top of which they make you their confidant, I’d say that chances are pretty high that it’s another sign that they’re romantically interested in you.

17) They ask your co-workers about you

You know how in school when someone had a crush on you they’d ask your friends about you?

Well, if your boss has been asking your co-workers about you, it might just be that they have a crush on you.

Now, they’ll ask your co-workers about your personal life – your hobbies, your taste in music and movies, your general likes and dislikes.

They’ll try to gather as much information about you as they can because they’re curious and maybe just a little bit infatuated with you.

18) They find a way to work with you alone on a project

Oh, how sneaky!

So your boss has found a way to work with you alone on a project.

If you think this is highly unusual, especially because this type of project requires a whole team, then you might be on to something.

Coupled with some of the other signs I’ve listed, if your boss has been able to get you alone on a project, it’s pretty safe to assume that they’re interested in spending some alone time with you.

19) Their body language is a dead give-away

What if I told you that you could tell how someone feels about you just by observing their body language?

You see, your boss doesn’t have to actually say anything to tell you that they like you.

All they need to do is show you that they like you through subtle body language.

Signs of attraction to look out for:

  • They turn towards you when talking to you.
  • They lean towards you when they talk to you.
  • They look at you longer than necessary.
  • They touch you on the arm or back when talking to you.

If I were you, I would try to read some books on body language.

That kind of information would definitely help you out in situations like these.

20) They invite you to late-night drinks after work (just you)

If your boss has invited you to late-night drinks after work (just you), it’s probably because they like you.

  • They’ll make sure they invite you to a bar or somewhere where they can get some privacy.
  • They’ll make sure it’s somewhere that’s close by and that people won’t be able to see them leaving.
  • They’ll make sure it’s somewhere that isn’t too expensive so you don’t feel uncomfortable about going.
  • They’ll make sure that the place is quiet enough for them to talk without being overheard by anyone else.
  • They might even do this as a test of your interest in them. If you say no then it means that you’re not interested and they might not invite you again.

Late-night drinks are an obvious sign that it’s more than just work.

21) They laugh too easily at anything you say

If your boss laughs at everything you say, even if it’s not really that amusing, it’s because to them, it is.

To them, you’re practically a stand-up comedian.

But hey, it’s not like they can be objective. After all, they have a crush on you.

Or maybe they’re trying too hard?

They wanna get your attention.

Either way, it’s most probably a sign that your boss likes you.

22) They tell you how incompetent your colleagues are

Your boss will be your biggest cheerleader.

  • They’ll be the first person to recommend you for any job or promotion.
  • They’ll be the first person to tell you about new opportunities that have opened up for you.

And you know what?

They’ll even go as far as to tell you about all the things your colleagues are doing wrong.

23) They tell you that you are invaluable

Your boss will tell you that you’re a valuable asset to the company.

  • They’ll tell you that there’s no one else who can do what you do.
  • They’ll tell you that there are no shortcuts to the top.
  • They’ll tell you that you’re the only person for the job.

This is all just sweet talk, a way to flirt with you using work.

They’re trying to get you to fall in love with them.

24) They make sure you know that they can make or break a career

Does your boss like to show off their power?

  • They’ll tell you that they’ve got connections with the bigwigs in the company.
  • They’ll tell you that they know people who can get you a promotion and a raise.

Here’s the truth:

This is their way of exerting their dominance.

They’re trying to make you feel like they’re in control.

They’re interested in you romantically and are trying to let you know that if you go out with them, it could make your career.

And if you don’t, well, you never know, you might just lose your job.

25) They pretend they don’t like you

Finally, if your boss likes you, they may actually go out of their way to hide it.

They may think it’s inappropriate to date their employees and will try to suppress their feelings.

And the result?

They’ll seem like they don’t like you.

So, if your boss has been acting like they have a problem with you lately and you don’t think you did anything to deserve that kind of negative attention, ask yourself, could they actually secretly like you?

Your boss likes you, what can you do about it?

As I said earlier, it’s flattering to be liked but it can be weird that it’s your boss.

It can make you feel like you owe them something and scared that if you don’t like them back you may lose your job.

Let’s face it, there are reasons that many companies have rules about dating co-workers and sexual harassment training.

So let’s see what you can do about it.

Ask yourself if you like the attention or not

Are you flattered? Do you like your boss back?

Are you interested in pursuing a relationship with them?

If you are, that’s ok, it’s your choice.

Office romances can be messy but seeing as people spend so much time at work, it’s inevitable that a lot of people meet their partner at the workplace.

And you never know, they might just be the love of your life.

Create boundaries

However, if you’re not interested in dating your boss, you have to set up clear boundaries.

For example, when they ask you to get late-night drinks, tell them, “No thank you” and that you don’t think it’s appropriate.

Be clear and polite.

Let them understand that you are there to work and that’s all.

Be direct

If they ask you out, flirt, or do anything else that is making you uncomfortable, let them know.

Tell them that you are flattered but not interested and that their behavior is making it difficult for you to get your job done.

Confide in someone you trust

If they don’t seem to get the message, you shouldn’t have to deal with this on your own.

Tell a trusted co-worker or even your HR department.

The most important thing is that you don’t let them walk all over you and that they respect your boundaries.

Never let yourself be forced into doing anything that you don’t want to do.

How this one revelation changed my love life

It’s Justin Brown here, the co-founder of Ideapod, and I have something to confess…

I used to believe I needed to be successful before I deserved to find someone who could love me.

I used to believe there was a “perfect person” out there and I just had to find them.

I used to believe I would finally be happy once I found “the one”.

What I now know is that these limiting beliefs were stopping me from building deep and intimate relationships with the people I was meeting. I was chasing an illusion that was leading me to loneliness.

If you want to change anything in your life, one of the most effective ways is to change your beliefs.

Unfortunately, it’s not an easy thing to do.

I’m lucky to have worked directly with the shaman Rudá Iandê in changing my beliefs about love. Doing so has changed my life forever.

Now, Rudá’s teachings can change your life, too.

As the co-founder of Ideapod, I’m in a unique position to be able to bring Rudá’s teachings to our global community.

We do this by promoting his masterclasses.

One of the most powerful masterclasses he has is the love and intimacy masterclass. In this class, Rudá breaks down his key lessons on cultivating healthy and nurturing relationships in your life.

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==> Check it out here.

Best wishes,
Justin Brown, Ideapod Founder

Written by Tina Fey

I've ridden the rails, gone off track and lost my train of thought. I'm writing for Ideapod to try and find it again. Hope you enjoy the journey with me.

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