Have you heard the phrase, “Getting back on the horse?” It’s about trying to succeed and overcoming obstacles despite experiencing failure, and this is exactly what it means to have resilience.
Resilience equips you with the emotional strength and awareness you need to get through adversity.
Most of us have faced a negative event at some point in our lives, whether it be the end of a relationship, illness, or the loss of a job. Whether you saw it coming or not, these events are not only stressful and challenging, but they’re life-changing.
For some people, they seem to have the natural ability to “bounce back” after difficult life events rather than give up or allow themselves to be overcome with anxiety and sadness.
What you may not realize is that being strong during difficult times takes practice, mental fortitude, and the belief that you can figure things out and adapt to change.
If you can relate, perhaps you’re wondering where you rank on the resilience and adversity scale.
You only need to look at our 6 signs you have higher resilience levels than the average person, according to psychology, to determine your mental and emotional strength.
Let’s get started.
1) You’re a good problem-solver.
The American Psychological Association (APA) defines a resilient person as someone who can adjust when facing something life-changing, whether it be trauma or a stressful event.
This doesn’t mean that resilient people don’t experience anxiety, stress, or even depression during tough times; it’s just that they can make positive and meaningful choices, allowing them to accept and adapt to their new norm.
But to do this, they’ve got to have good problem-solving skills.
Think about a situation where you’ve had to think on your feet. Whether at work, college or on the sports field, your ability to problem-solve helped you work through a challenge.
People who are problem-solvers can identify solutions when they face an issue or emergency. While they may initially be set back by fear and anxiety, they’re mentally and emotionally equipped to calm themselves and think about a rational way to deal with it.
So, suppose you have a higher level of resilience than the average person. In that case, you already have the skills and knowledge to determine how to move forward when an unexpected event or problem becomes a reality.
As a good problem-solver, you’re equipped to resolve conflict, work through problems, and adapt on your own.
2) You have a sense of mastery over your life.
You can have mastery in a specific sport or language, but you can also have it over your life skills.
Mastery is about believing that you have control over something. When it comes to your life path or circumstances, this skill gives you the confidence and the motivation to take things into your own hands, but in a constructive way, of course!
Believing that you can conquer trials in your life gives you an exceptional level of resilience. This type of confidence in your own abilities is known as self-efficacy, and it’s something we all need to succeed.
For those who have gone through trauma, having a real sense of mastery over your life allows you to take control of your outcome.
This means that you choose to accept and adjust to the situation and navigate the difficulties or limitations that come with it. You don’t give up.
Mastery is what highly resilient people possess because it provides the belief that you have control over your life even when negative or unexpected things happen.
3) You forgive yourself when you make mistakes.
This is probably one of the hardest steps to take when your world gets turned upside down. Forgiving yourself and recognizing that mistakes are part of your life’s journey is not only a sign of being highly resilient but also emotionally mature.
In psychology, being mentally resilient means learning from failures, and we can do this through a process called self-forgiveness.
For most people, when they make a mistake that gets them into trouble at work or creates conflict in a relationship, they shift the focus from the mistake to finding fault with who they are as a person.
Some people become stuck in a destructive mental loop by telling themselves that they’re not good enough or that they’re failures.
Obviously, saying these negative things to yourself can create self-doubt. It knocks your confidence and leaves you questioning your self-worth.
By forgiving yourself, you let go of the action or the mistake rather than attacking who you are at your core.
It’s not about making excuses but rather understanding that if you fail at something, it doesn’t mean that you will continue to fail at everything you do.
4) You have a strong support circle.
Every highly resilient person knows that they have people to lean on when they feel like they can’t cope.
One of the greatest predictors of resilience and the ability to work through hardship is having social support. This could be your immediate family, close friends, or a community that you can rely on when you feel overwhelmed.
The reason that a social network is so important is because speaking to other people about your problems or challenges can provide a different perspective. It helps you view your situation from a new angle, which can shed some much-needed light on finding a way forward.
Being extremely resilient doesn’t mean that you never ask someone for help.
Even the most resilient people in the world understand that having people you can trust and who will be there through those dark times is necessary for guidance and encouragement.
Reaching out to the people you care about for help is not a sign of weakness. It’s a sign of strength because you know that emotional support and the objectivity provided by your support group can provide clarity.
It lets you know that you’re not alone.
5) You’re emotionally intelligent.
Emotional intelligence is one of the sure signs of resilience. But for you to determine whether it’s a quality that you have, you’ve got to know exactly what it is.
People who are emotionally intelligent understand their feelings and how to manage them. They can form strong connections because they find it easy to relate to others.
Now that we’re familiar with emotional intelligence, how is it linked to resilience?
When you have emotional awareness and intelligence, you can identify and change negative ways of thinking. This helps you build a positive and strong mindset, allowing you to view challenges as opportunities rather than obstacles or limitations.
Self-motivation and optimism are strong indicators of resilience as they contribute to productivity and happiness.
When you’re optimistic, empathetic, and able to adapt to challenges that come your way, you can survive a crisis and know that you’re going to be more than fine. Your emotional intelligence helps you resolve conflict and reach out to people you trust for support.
But there’s another positive side to being emotionally intelligent. Because it allows you to show compassion to others and relate to what they’re experiencing, you feel good when your friends, family, or colleagues turn to you for support.
Feeling needed and recognizing how you can help other people instills a sense of value and resilience.
6) You take accountability for your problems.
This might go hand-in-hand with accepting and overcoming failure. Rather than blame others for your misgivings, you take full responsibility for your mistakes, which is the best way to learn and move forward.
Look at it this way…
If you didn’t take responsibility for the choices you made and the consequences of those actions, how would you ever learn, grow, and progress?
When you’re accountable, you accept the part you played in the issue and do whatever you can to overcome it. The more you’re able to stick to your plan of working hard and bouncing back, so to speak, the more you build your sense of resilience.
But it’s also about understanding how to incorporate healthy coping strategies when things go wrong.
A sign that you have higher resilience than the average person, based on psychology, is your ability to introspect, practice relaxation, and engage in exercises that help you focus on achieving your goals.
These steps encourage optimism and mindfulness, which we need to overcome obstacles in our path.
Final words
You can think of resilience as the psychological tools that you need to manage your life when adversity crosses your path.
This doesn’t mean that resilient people are immune to emotional pain and the fear that comes with challenges. It just means that you can take control of your life and not succumb to stress or feel like you’ve failed and given up.
If you believe that you need to work on your resilience, it’s time to accept and not fight change. Refine your problem-solving skills and try to be more optimistic about your future.
Hopefully, these 6 signs that you have higher resilience levels than the average person will help you grow and equip yourself with the emotional and mental tools you need to deal with challenges by turning them into opportunities for growth and success.
