People usually think being strong means being able to choose reason over emotion, but that’s not always true.
In fact, people who have a strong personality can also have intense emotions, which makes them super sensitive.
That means it’s completely possible to be fearless and outspoken, but also have a heart of gold; to be tough and assertive, but also be compassionate and caring.
Think this is you? Read more below to see if you can relate to these 10 signs that you have a strong personality, but are also super sensitive.
1) You fight for what is right
As a person with a strong personality, you always try to fight for what is right. When you see the smallest injustice, you’re quick to call it out.
Your ears will perk when someone at work makes a slightly homophobic remark, even if it means getting into an argument. Even in your circle, when a male friend cracks a casually misogynist joke, you won’t let it slide.
That’s not only because your personality is strong—it’s also because you’re super sensitive as a person. You might have even been called a “snowflake” because of this tendency, which can be really offensive!
But don’t let these remarks get to you. It’s better to be “too sensitive” than to be insensitive.
You know that even the jokes they perceive to be harmless can actually hurt vulnerable people, and every time you let it slip, it becomes more and more possible for it to be normalized.
Maybe you’ve even been told you’re a complainer because you constantly call out offensive remarks.
2) You’ve been told you’re a complainer
I personally believe I’m a person with a strong personality, but I’m also super sensitive.
Because when I was younger, I was always pointing out things I thought were wrong, and people usually told me I complained too much. It used to hurt when people tell me I’m a complainer, but I’ve learned better now.
I’ve learned that being a complainer is better than being an enabler. I simply can’t be a bystander as someone gets hurt in front of me—when I see it, I have the responsibility to stop it.
And if you’ve been told the same thing, don’t believe them. In other words, don’t put up with their BS.
Let your strong personality make them feel uncomfortable. Complain as you must. Be as sensitive as you possibly can. It’s the only way we can get in touch with other people’s struggles, and be able to help.
3) You take care of others
People who have a strong personality are usually perceived to be cold and uncaring, but this is simply not true.
And as a strong but sensitive person, you prove this wrong with how much you take care of others, especially your friends.
You’re caring, but you’re also assertive. In fact, you’ve probably been called the “mom friend” of the group, because you’re always the responsible one.
You’re the one who chooses where to eat when the group can’t decide, who prevents your friends from drinking too much so they don’t get wasted, and who won’t stop messaging the group chat to make sure everyone gets home safe.
How could you ever be cold and uncaring when you love so many people in your life so freely?
4) You have a hard time dating
Modern dating doesn’t really work for you. Your friends tell you it’s just because you’re “too picky,” but it’s not as simple as that.
You have a hard time dating because people get intimidated by your strong personality, or scared away by your high sensitivity. It’s a very frustrating double whammy.
But don’t let this let you down. Finding the right person is hard, but when you meet them, it’s pure magic.
The right person is someone who can complement your strong personality but is also capable of handling your high sensitivity.
And in the modern dating world, there’s just too many people who are not ready to commit to something that serious. The relationships you seek are far too meaningful for you to find your person easily.
5) You seek meaningful relationships
Your strong personality often makes people think you’re too intimidating to make friends or find a romantic partner, but they couldn’t be more wrong.
Because you’re also super sensitive, you have a wonderful group of friends that care about you just as much as you care about them. They don’t see your sensitivity as a weakness, but a strength that continues to strengthen your bond.
If you have a partner, it’s true that you might have had a hard time finding them, but their ability to complement your unique personality just makes them all the more special.
It’s this kind of meaningful relationship that helps you give good, honest advice because you have a genuine caring for the people around you.
6) You’re gently honest
Most people often find it difficult to be honest with their friends, and it’s understandable. Sometimes, honesty hurts, and it hurts us to see our friends in pain.
But as a strong but sensitive person, you’re able to be honest with your friends without being brutal—it’s called gentle honesty.
The difference between brutal honesty and gentle honesty is that there’s an element of caring in the latter. It doesn’t take away the pain, but it definitely softens the blow.
For example, when they’re enthusiastic about a food they cooked and you think it’s horrible, you don’t immediately tell them while they’re happily telling you the achievement.
Instead, you wait for the enthusiasm to die down, maybe let a day or two passes, and then gently give constructive advice. You don’t tell them the food is disgusting. You simply say you think there’s room for improvement, and give advice when you can.
But how are you able to give good, honest advice? Well, it’s mainly because you’re also a good listener.
7) You’re a good listener
Conversations are important for us to connect with other people. That makes it all the more surprising that not many people are good listeners.
In conversations, when it’s not our turn to talk, we tend to simply wait our turn and think of a response.
But being a good listener means more than just knowing what to say, but also how to listen. Knowing this is one of the pros of having a strong but sensitive personality.
You’re strong enough to know what to say with confidence, but sensitive enough to actually listen to what the other person has to say.
And being able to listen to other people’s needs is one of the reasons that makes you a natural leader.
8) You’re a natural leader
When people think of leaders, they think of people who are authoritative and rational—someone who demands respect from their people, sometimes through fear.
And while it’s true that you can do all of this with your strong personality, what people usually don’t see is how your sensitivity also contributes to your leadership skills.
In fact, it’s the combination of these two traits that make you such a wonderful leader.
You’re strong enough to push people to achieve your goals as a group, but at the same time, you’re sensitive enough to know what they need to achieve those goals.
Personally, I think being sensitive is a more important trait for a leader. Fear of strength and punishment might go a long way, but nothing achieves more consistent goals than love and nurturing.
9) You’re independent…
As a strong but sensitive person, you can do many things on your own.
You’re not afraid to go to the movies alone or eat outside by yourself. You appreciate solitude, but you also like being in the company of your friends.
But your super sensitivity also means you know that independence doesn’t mean being individualistic.
The former means you can sustain yourself while also acknowledging the need for human connection, while the latter insists they can do everything on their own without the help of others.
It’s this ability to be vulnerable that makes you a strong, but super sensitive person.
10) …but you can also be vulnerable
Vulnerability is something that often isn’t expected of people with a strong personality.
However, behind someone with a strong personality is their ability to be vulnerable.
You fight for others because you feel a strong connection to them. You hate injustice because you, too, have been vulnerable to it.
Your strong personality isn’t only strong—it comes from you having a super sensitive heart that enables you to welcome vulnerability instead of avoiding it.
In conclusion
At first glance, a strong personality and being super sensitive can seem mutually exclusive. You’re either one or the other, but you can’t be both.
But this is not always the case. As we’ve discussed, people with a strong personality are often super sensitive, too, and these traits can actually be complementary.
A strong personality makes you assertive enough to achieve your goals, and being super sensitive creates the passion that drives you to achieve these goals.
If you think you might be a person with a strong personality but is also super sensitive, consider yourself lucky, because it’s a really special thing to be!
Related: 13 signs you have some edgy personality traits that intimidate others
