9 signs you have a healthy sense of self-love, according to psychology

As individuals, we all strive to feel valued, cherished, and respected.

These feelings are born out of self-love, a key aspect to leading a wholesome, fulfilling life.

Self-love isn’t about being self-obsessed or narcissistic. Instead, it’s taking care of your own needs, not sacrificing your well-being to please others, and not settling for less than you deserve.

A healthy sense of self-love can often be hard to identify, especially with societal pressures and the constant comparison game through social media. But, it is crucial for our overall mental health and well-being.

In this article, drawing from psychology, I will share 9 signs that highlight a healthy sense of self-love. Recognising these signs in yourself could be your first step towards a more fulfilled life. So, let’s dive right in!

1) You prioritize self-care

Self-care is not just about pampering yourself with occasional spa days or indulging in a slice of cake now and then, it involves taking the time to nourish your body, mind, and soul on a regular basis.

When you have a healthy sense of self-love, you understand the importance of taking care of your physical health, nurturing your mental well-being and feeding your soul with activities that bring you joy.

This could be as simple as ensuring you get enough sleep, eating healthily, exercising regularly or taking some quiet time each day to meditate or read a book.

You don’t allow the demands of life, work, or relationships to compromise your health and well-being. Instead, you set boundaries and ensure that you allocate time for self-care because you understand it’s not a luxury but a necessity.

2) You practice self-compassion

When you have a healthy sense of self-love, you’re kind to yourself in thoughts, words, and actions. That doesn’t mean you ignore your flaws or mistakes. Rather, it means you acknowledge them without harsh judgment or criticism.

Just as you would show understanding and compassion to a friend who’s made a mistake, you apply the same kindness to yourself. You don’t beat yourself up over past mistakes or dwell on negative aspects.

Instead, you accept that being imperfect is a part of being human, and you use your mistakes as opportunities for growth and learning. This ability to be self-compassionate is a definite indicator of self-love.

3) You’re not afraid of being alone

It might seem odd, but enjoying your own company is a sign of healthy self-love.

When you love yourself, you don’t need constant validation or company from others to feel fulfilled. You don’t fear solitude because you enjoy your own thoughts, ideas, and interests.

You value the time you spend alone because it gives you the opportunity to reflect, relax and rejuvenate. And no, it’s not being antisocial, it’s about truly understanding the importance of balancing social time with personal time.

4) You’re not defined by your failures

Life is a rollercoaster of ups and downs, successes and failures. Having a healthy sense of self-love doesn’t mean you’re always winning. In fact, it often means the opposite.

When you love yourself, you understand that failure is not a reflection of your worth. You don’t view your mistakes as defining points in your life, but rather as stepping stones leading you to growth and wisdom.

You allow yourself to feel the disappointment that comes with failure, but you don’t let it consume you or break your spirit. Instead, you pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and boldly continue on your journey.

5) You extend the love you have for yourself to others

When you truly love yourself, you naturally become more loving and kind towards others. You understand that everyone, just like you, is on a journey with their own struggles and victories.

Rather than being judgemental or critical, you display empathy and compassion to those around you. This doesn’t mean you let people walk over you. Instead, you treat others with the same respect and kindness that you would want to be treated with.

6) You set healthy boundaries

We’ve all been there: saying yes when we really want to say no. Overcommitting ourselves to please others. But when you have a healthy sense of self-love, you realize that it’s okay to say no.

Setting healthy boundaries with family, friends, or work signifies that you value your own time and mental well-being. You understand that it’s not selfish to protect your energy and space.

You’re able to communicate your needs and limits clearly and assertively, without feeling guilty or fearing backlash. This willingness to prioritize your own needs is a clear sign of self-love.

7) You celebrate your successes, no matter how small

When you love yourself, every win, no matter how small, is worth celebrating. Did you manage to finish reading that book you’ve been putting off? Great job! Did you finally clean out your wardrobe? That’s awesome!

You don’t wait for monumental achievements to pat yourself on the back. You understand that every step forward, no matter how tiny, is progress and deserves recognition.

This habit of celebrating your own achievements, and not just waiting for others to acknowledge them, shows a healthy dose of self-love. After all, who better to cheer you on than yourself?

8) You don’t tolerate disrespect

When you love yourself, you understand your worth and you won’t let anyone treat you less than you deserve. This isn’t about arrogance or entitlement, it’s about self-respect.

You don’t allow people to belittle, manipulate or take advantage of you. If someone consistently disrespects you, you’re not afraid to cut ties, no matter who they are. It could be a long-time friend, a family member, or even a romantic partner.

It’s tough, but sometimes necessary. Standing up for yourself and refusing to accept disrespect is a strong sign of self-love.

9) You accept yourself as you are

At the end of the day, the most profound sign of self-love is total self-acceptance. You understand that you are a work in progress and that’s okay.

You appreciate your strengths and accept your weaknesses without letting them define you. You’re not striving for perfection but for growth.

You know you’re not everyone’s cup of tea, and you’re completely fine with it. Because you don’t need the whole world to love you, you just need to love yourself.

Genuine self-love is about embracing who you are, right here, right now. Self-acceptance isn’t just a destination, it’s a journey. And it’s the most meaningful journey you’ll ever embark on.

Picture of Ava Sinclair

Ava Sinclair

Ava Sinclair is a former competitive athlete who transitioned into the world of wellness and mindfulness. Her journey through the highs and lows of competitive sports has given her a unique perspective on resilience and mental toughness. Ava’s writing reflects her belief in the power of small, daily habits to create lasting change.

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