8 signs you are dating someone who is unhappy in life

In the beginning, things were great. You know, exciting, fresh, and full of potential. 

You both made an effort, went out, and did things. I’m talking about the kind of activities only new couples do. 

Simply put, you had a blast together. 

But somewhere along the line (you’re not sure when), things started to feel a little off. Now, for whatever reason, your partner seems distant – distracted even. 

You just can’t put your finger on it. One minute you’re deeply in love, then the next, you’re disjointed. 

It’s like you’re two ships passing in the night. 

You think to yourself…

“Is it me, or is there something bigger going on here?” 

Well, if you recognize these eight signs, chances are it’s the latter and you’re dating someone who’s unhappy in life.

1) Your conversations are one-sided (at best)

Gone are the days of witty banter, silly late-night discussions, and honeyed words. Instead, they’ve been replaced by muffled silence.

In fact, when you think about it, they barely acknowledge you at all (grunts don’t count). 

Honestly, it’s like you’re talking to a brick wall. Even when they are “listening to you” they’re constantly glancing down at their phone, a monitor, or the TV. 

Basically, they’re looking anywhere and everywhere – just not in your direction. 

And that’s because they’re stonewalling you.

Does any of this sound familiar?

When people are unhappy in life, they may start to withdraw from the people closest to them. Perhaps their speech becomes slower or they appear disconnected and unable to concentrate.  

Here’s the thing.

If this behavior has been going on for a while (more than two weeks) it could be a sign that they’re more than just unhappy, they’re suffering from depression. 

And it might be time to get them some help. 

2) The romance has all but died

Things started off pretty steamy. You were all hands, hands, and more hands. You couldn’t get enough of each other. 

But recently, things have started to sizzle out. 

And the intimacy (and affection) you once shared are practically non-existent. In other words, you’re in a rut.

You start making excuses… 

Hey, “Maybe, they had a bad day.” And you know what, “Not everyone has a high sex drive.”

After all, it’s normal for people’s libido to fluctuate

However, a sudden, sharp, and unexplained decline in sexual desire could be a sign that the person you’re dating is actually struggling because they’re unhappy in life. 

3) Mood swings are a daily thing now

They finally mustered up enough energy to get out of bed and spend some time with you. 

You’re both having a great day. 

Then, suddenly (and seemingly out of nowhere) they snap at you over the stupidest little thing. 

What did you do? Well, nothing. Not, really. 

The actual issue here is that they’re unhappy in life and instead of dealing with it, they take it out on you by picking a fight. 

Let me explain.

Things such as stress, anxiety, hormonal imbalances, and lack of sleep can all contribute to shifts in someone’s emotional state. 

However, regular or serious mood swings (for example, being overly sensitive, irritable, or manic) could indicate something more worrying than a simple case of “being in a bad mood.”

Especially if it’s out of character for them.

4) They keep canceling plans last minute

Do they keep flaking on plans with little to no notice? Or perhaps they keep saying “no” to meeting up and spending some much-needed quality time together. 

Once or twice you can forgive. 

But lately, it’s become a common occurrence and you want to know why. What’s more, their excuses are getting worse – work, sickness, bad weather, the dog.

The truth is, the person you’re dating might be unhappy in life. 

When people are sad or downcast, they might begin to isolate themselves from others. 

It’s their way of coping or avoiding the issue altogether. 

Not only that.

But they may also be worried about appearing vulnerable in front of you, fearing you’ll judge or view them in a negative light – perhaps even leave them.

But therein lies the problem…

By avoiding you now, they only risk jeopardizing the relationship further by pushing you away instead of sitting down and communicating how they really feel. 

5) Compliments make them uneasy

pic2280 8 signs you are dating someone who is unhappy in life

How do you typically respond when someone compliments you or offers some well-deserved praise?

Chances are, you’ll say “thank you.” Maybe you’ll provide some kind words in return. It’s only polite. 

But not if you’re unhappy. 

Think about it.

When someone’s feeling low or sorrowful, their confidence is bound to take a knock. 

In other words, they lack self-esteem

They may even feel hopeless, inadequate, or even shameful due to their melancholy and woe. 

It’s disparaging (to say the least). 

As a result, accepting a pat on the back is easier said than done. It’s like they’re incapable of enjoying themselves or letting their guard down – even if it’s just for a minute. 

Ultimately, their unhappiness becomes all-consuming and a self-prophesying mindset. 

6) They keep wearing the same old sweatpants 

Wearing the same (unwashed) baggy pants and coffee-stained hoodies is one thing, but the no showering and general lack of hygiene… 

Well, that’s another story.

It’s like they’ve completely given up! But the truth is, it’s not their fault.

Sometimes, when we’re unhappy in life, our appearance (and even hygiene) can take a back seat. 

In fact, small tasks such as brushing your teeth or getting out of bed in the morning can be a major challenge. 

That said, it’s not that they don’t want to do these things. 

They simply lack motivation. 

Mostly, though, they’re too tired to even try. 

Something which brings us to the penultimate point of this list… 

7) They are always “too tired”

When someone is constantly “too tired” to do anything, even after spending all night (and day) sleeping, it’s a major red flag.

That’s right. 

Extreme fatigue or inexplicable changes in sleep patterns shouldn’t be ignored. And it could be a telltale warning sign that someone is unhappy

Perhaps to the point of depression. 

This feeling of malaise and tiredness can bleed into their personal life and affect things such as their daily routine or responsibilities (for example, housework, career, finances) in a significant way. 

As you may have guessed, it can have a lasting impact on their relationships with friends, family, and loved ones. 

This leads nicely to the final point in this article…

8) You feel lonely

Oftentimes when a loved one is unhappy, it’s not just them that suffers. 

It’s those around them.

Honestly, it can be downright lonely. Especially if you happen to be dating them. It can feel like you’re losing the person you once knew and loved. 

It’s heartbreaking. 

Of course, you instinctively want to do your best by them – no matter what. But there comes a time when you have a decision to make. 

Do you continue to provide emotional support unconditionally, or do you call it quits? 

It’s not an easy question to answer, I know. 

However, if you find that their emotional state is affecting your own mental health, it might be time to reconsider the relationship. 

At the end of the day, unhappiness in life is an internal struggle. And if they’re not willing to help themselves, there’s a point when you need to put your well-being first. 

Leila El-Dean

Leila El-Dean

Leila is a passionate writer with a background in photography and art. She has over ten years of experience in branding, marketing, and building websites. She loves travelling and has lived in several countries, including Thailand, Malaysia, Spain, and Malta. When she’s not writing (or ogling cats), Leila loves trying new food and drinking copious amounts of Earl Grey tea.

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