9 signs someone finds you very attractive (but is too insecure to admit it)

Reading the signs of attraction can sometimes feel like piecing together a puzzle with no clear image.

Often, someone may find you incredibly attractive, but insecurities hold them back from voicing their feelings.

These signals can be subtle, hidden behind shyness or fear of rejection—but when you know what to look for, it becomes easier to spot these hints.

In this article, we’re going to explore some of the telltale signs that someone finds you irresistible, even if they’re too insecure to say it outright.

Let’s get started!

1) Eye contact

As they say, eyes are the windows to the soul.

When someone finds you attractive, their eyes are naturally drawn towards you. They may even find it hard to look away.

This is one of the most basic and primal signs of attraction.

But if the person is insecure, this can manifest in an interesting way. They might quickly look away when you catch their gaze or seem a bit flustered.

This is because they’re worried about revealing their feelings.

These glances might be fleeting, but they’re worth paying attention to. When someone can’t help but get lost in your eyes, even if they’re too shy to admit it, it’s a clear sign of attraction.

2) They’re nervous around you

This one takes me back to my high school years.

I remember there was this girl who always seemed a bit jittery around me. She would laugh a little too hard at my jokes, fumble with her words and even spill her coffee once or twice.

At first, I just thought she was just a naturally nervous person. But then I started to notice that it was only around me she got this way.

Whenever we interacted, she would become clumsy and tongue-tied, a stark contrast to the confident and composed person I saw in group settings.

It took me a while to catch on, but eventually, I realized that she was attracted to me. Her nervousness was a response to her feelings for me, which she was too insecure to admit outright.

And now, we’ve been together for three years.

So, if someone acts unusually awkward or jittery around you, it might not be just their nerves acting up. It could very well be a sign of underlying attraction they’re too shy to express directly.

3) They mirror your actions

Mirror neurons in our brains are responsible for empathy, learning, and understanding others’ actions.

These neurons also fire when we unconsciously mimic someone’s behavior—a phenomenon known as mirroring.

In the context of attraction, when someone is into you, they might unconsciously start to mirror your movements.

This could be as simple as leaning in when you lean in, crossing their legs when you cross yours, or even picking up on your speech patterns.

But if this person is insecure, they may not even realize they’re doing it.

It’s their body’s natural way of trying to establish a connection with you, even if they can’t voice their feelings.

So next time you talk to them, take note of their body language. It might be telling you more than their words ever could.

4) They remember small details about you

We all have a lot on our minds, and it’s easy to forget minor details.

But when someone is attracted to you, they tend to remember the little things you’ve shared with them.

This could be anything from your favorite movie to a story you told them weeks ago. You might find it surprising when they bring up these small details in conversation, showing that they’ve been paying attention.

But if they’re too insecure to admit their feelings, they’ll likely downplay this attentiveness. They might try to brush it off as having a good memory or being naturally observant.

Don’t be fooled.

Remembering these small details is a sign that you’re on their mind more often than not. It’s one of the subtle ways they show their attraction, even if they can’t put their feelings into words.

5) They initiate contact

phone habits that reveal youre more introverted than you think 9 signs someone finds you very attractive (but is too insecure to admit it)

When someone is attracted to you, they’ll often find ways to initiate contact.

This doesn’t necessarily mean physical touch, although that could be part of it. It could also mean reaching out to chat, asking for your opinion, or suggesting activities you could do together.

However, if they’re insecure about their feelings, they may keep their distance physically while still trying to maintain a connection verbally or digitally.

They might message you just to check in, send you interesting articles they think you’d like, or always be the first to comment on your social media posts.

Their insecurity may prevent them from being too upfront about their intentions, but their desire to keep the lines of communication open is a clear sign of attraction.

They’re putting in the effort to engage with you, indicating that you’re important to them and they want you in their life.

6) They show genuine concern for your well-being

When someone cares about you, your happiness and well-being become their concern. This level of care and attention can be a powerful sign of attraction.

If someone is always there to lend a listening ear when you’re upset, constantly checks up on you when you’re not feeling well, or goes out of their way to brighten your day, these are all signs that they find you attractive.

But when insecurities come into play, they may not express these feelings directly. Instead, they’ll show their affection through acts of kindness and concern.

They may worry about coming on too strong or being rejected, so they express their feelings in a more subtle, yet equally meaningful way.

7) They support and encourage your passions

There was a time in my life when I was obsessed with photography. I was not particularly good at it, but I loved it.

There was this person who knew about my hobby.

She would always ask about my latest clicks, give me constructive feedback, and even surprise me with a book on photography techniques once.

She wasn’t into photography herself, but she never failed to encourage me and show interest in my work.

At first, I didn’t think much of it.

But then I realized that she was showing an interest because she was attracted to me. She was too shy to express her feelings outright, but her consistent support for my passion was a clear sign of her attraction.

Unfortunately, I couldn’t reciprocate her feelings. Still, knowing she was attracted to me enabled me to let her down gently.

So, if someone shows genuine interest in your hobbies and passions and encourages you in your pursuits, even if they don’t share the same interests, it could be a sign that they find you attractive but are too insecure to admit it.

8) They seem a little jealous

Jealousy, when not taken to extremes, can be a subtle sign of attraction.

When someone finds you attractive, they might feel a pang of jealousy when they see you interacting closely with others.

They might ask about the people you spend time with or seem a bit off when you talk about your close friends. These reactions usually stem from their wish to be the one you share these close bonds with.

Their insecurity may prevent them from expressing this feeling openly. Instead, they might try to hide it under the guise of casual curiosity or concern.

While it’s important not to confuse concern with possessiveness, a bit of healthy jealousy can indicate that someone is attracted to you but too shy to admit it.

9) They give you their undivided attention

In a world full of distractions, giving someone your undivided attention is perhaps the sincerest form of attraction.

When someone really likes you, they make you feel like you’re the only person in the room.

They’ll listen attentively when you speak, maintain eye contact, and respond thoughtfully to your words. They’ll make an effort to engage deeply with what you’re saying, showing that they value your thoughts and opinions.

If they’re insecure, they may not vocalize their feelings for you. But their attention—the way they focus solely on you when you’re together—speaks volumes about their attraction.

Even if someone doesn’t admit their feelings outright, actions often speak louder than words.

Keep an eye out for these subtle signs of attraction; they might just reveal what’s really going on under the surface.

Picture of Lucas Graham

Lucas Graham

Lucas Graham, based in Auckland, writes about the psychology behind everyday decisions and life choices. His perspective is grounded in the belief that understanding oneself is the key to better decision-making. Lucas’s articles are a mix of personal anecdotes and observations, offering readers relatable and down-to-earth advice.

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