15 definite signs she wants to sleep with you

There’s a woman you’ve got your eye on, and she seems to be noticing you too.

But you don’t want to make a fool of yourself or misread the situation. How do you know if she’s just having fun flirting, or if she wants to take things to the bedroom?

Look no further.

Here are 15 signs she wants to sleep with you

1) She tells you that she lives alone

Living arrangements is a common conversation topic that can easily pop up when you’re getting to know someone.

But sometimes a comment may seem very unprecedented.

She might find a way to sneak the fact that she lives alone into a conversation that has nothing to do with it. Especially if you didn’t ask her about it. Women are often more cautious about sharing things like this, and so if she volunteers it freely, she may be trying to give you a hint.

She may also ask about your own living situation. But this could also be a sign of simple curiosity, or her trying to plan how to react if you happen to invite her back to your place.

Be sure not to jump to conclusions and don’t assume that talking about living alone is an invitation to have sex. Watch her body language as she says this — does she tense up, or is she flirty and relaxed?

If telling you she lives alone is meant as a sign she wants to sleep with you, she’ll likely follow it up with a flirty suggestion or a direct invitation.

2) She invites you over to her place

Of course an invitation to come to her place doesn’t automatically mean an invitation to have sex.

But at the very least it means she’s starting to trust you. And she’s much more likely to want to sleep with you if she invites you over than if she doesn’t.

If she offers this, pay attention to how she asks. Does she give you a reason to come over, or does she simply ask if you’d like to come upstairs?

Does she ask in a serious or neutral tone of voice, or does she put a bit of flirting into it?

Your best bet here is to accept, but look for more explicit signs of consent before you move things forward.

Even if nothing happens this first time, that doesn’t mean it never will. She might be interested in you, but wants to take things slow.

3) She asks you about your sexual preferences

If a woman wants to sleep with you, she’ll want to know all about what you like under the covers.

What are your favorite positions? What’s the craziest place you’ve had sex? What are your wildest fantasies?

These are the kinds of questions you might have to field.

A woman doesn’t usually want to find out what you like in bed unless she wants to get in it with you.

But if you want to make sure, try responding with a playful joke like, “I can show you later tonight if you’d like.”

You can also try asking her some questions back. If she talks openly about what she likes, she’s practically giving you an instruction manual to what to do later that night.

You might also notice her trying to make her sexual preferences seem compatible with yours. She might mention the same positions you did, or say that she’d love to try things that she knows you have already done.

Watch her body language as you have this conversation. Heavy flirting indicates this is not just a topic she enjoys discussing — she’s got an agenda!

4) She shares personal things with you

Relationship experts say that men fall in love through being intimate, and women become intimate once they fall in love.

We can’t apply this to all women — some women may never sleep with you, no matter how well they know you, and others may do it without even knowing your last name.

Women also open up with girlfriends and close guy friends. So the fact that she shares a lot with you doesn’t automatically mean she wants to sleep with you.

But getting very up close and personal with you is definitely a positive sign. You are becoming closer on some level, and if you couple this with physical chemistry and flirting, you’re well on your way to getting under the covers.

And I don’t mean just to tell ghost stories!

Still, there’s something you should know.

While sharing personal details can be an indicator of physical attraction and possibly even a prelude to sexual intimacy, opening up emotionally can also signal a desire for something deeper.

I learned this profound insight through the Love and Intimacy Masterclass by the famous shaman Rudá Iandé.

In this free masterclass, Rudá points out that true intimacy is a blend of both emotional openness and physical connection.

So, if she’s sharing personal things with you, consider the possibility that she might not just be interested in a casual hookup, but perhaps something deeper.

And if you’re uncertain about the intricacies of intimacy, emotional or otherwise, this masterclass is an invaluable resource.

Trust me, it will transform the way you view relationships.

Click here to access the free masterclass.

5) She has suggestive body language

You can notice the most definite signs she wants to sleep with you from her body language.

There are lots of ways women communicate sexual interest:

  • She bites or licks her lips
  • She plays with her hair
  • She crosses her legs while sitting to reveal more skin on her thigh (if wearing a skirt or dress)
  • She dangles a high heel from one foot
  • She sensually caresses a glass or another object while talking to you
  • She tilts her head to the side to reveal more of her neck
  • She draws attention to her chest by pushing it out or pressing her arms to it from the sides
  • She touches her body or fixes her clothing
  • She uses a sensual tone of voice
  • She tilts her head down and looks up at you
  • She lifts her shoulder and looks at you over it

These are all ways of emphasizing her femininity. She may do this to try to make you attracted to her, hoping you’ll take initiative and make the first move.

As you watch out for these signs, make sure you’re also using your own body language to turn her on.

6) She touches you a lot

If she wants to put her body on yours, she’ll start trying to do it long before you reach the bedroom.

She might touch your arms a lot when talking to you, feel your muscles, or playfully punch you when you tease her.

But some women are simply more touchy feely. A more obvious sign that she’s interested in sex is if she puts her hand on your thigh — this is very suggestive and women know this very well! Touching your chest or closer to your belt is another way she may try to create sexual arousal.

She’ll also try to escalate your advances when you initiate physical contact. She’ll lean into your arm if you put it around her, or try to slide her hands to a more daring place.

A great way to gauge her physical attraction to you is to invite her to dance. If she wants to sleep with you, she’ll use the opportunity to be sensual or even dance dirty.

If you see her making advances, try taking things a little further. She may be trying to get you to make the next move!

7) She tries to look her very best

A woman who’s interested in your body will try to make you interested in hers too.

She’ll try to put all her best assets on display and put a lot of care into her appearance.

Obviously, women dress how they want, without trying to seduce anybody. But if you notice her investing more effort than usual into looking good, there’s probably a reason for this.

To know if she’s looking for sex, see if there are any more explicit signs. These might include bright lipstick, plunging necklines, or revealing clothing.

But always remember that women are very individual. Something that’s a surefire sign of sexual interest for one woman may just be an everyday look for another.

When you see this sign that she’s trying to make you want her body, look for any other signs on this list before you jump to conclusions.

8) She stands or sits very close to you

Another subtle sign she wants to sleep with you is that she stands and sits very close to you.

If what she wants becomes a reality, there will be no space between you two at all.

A woman who’s thinking like that will in no way keep you at arm’s length. On the contrary — she’ll want as little distance between you two as possible.

You might notice her sitting down a little closer to you than normal, leaning in close to you, or standing close enough for her body to brush against yours.

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She might also take opportunities to get closer to you. For example, she might whisper in your ear, or hug you longer than normal. She may even talk at a low volume so you have to lean in to hear her.

A girl who’s doing this on purpose will also probably try her best to smell very nice. You’ll catch a whiff of perfume, or maybe a breath mint.

9) She constantly brings up sex

Does she constantly bring up sex?

This is another clear sign that she wants to sleep with you.

A woman who has her sights set on you — and especially a particular part of you — will be thinking about sex a lot when she’s with you.

She wants you to think about sex too. So what does she do? She brings it up! Over and over again, even when it’s not part of the topic of conversation.

You might notice dirty jokes popping up very often. She might use suggestive language even for unrelated topics. And she may even freely talk to you about her sexual experience.

A common example of this is her talking about how bad her last partners were at sex. She’s practically challenging you to show you can do better!

It’s clear where she wants your mind to go when you’re with her. She just doesn’t want to say it outright, so she tries to get you to make a move by guiding your thoughts.

To see if this really is a definite sign she wants to sleep with you, respond to her comments to rev up the tension. Try making some dirty jokes of your own to escalate the conversation. If she responds positively, it’s clear where she wants the conversation to lead.


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10) She checks out your body

If a woman wants to sleep with you, she’ll try to show you she’s interested to get you to make the next move.

One of the most definite signs is that she checks you out.

Now, she won’t out and out ogle you. She’ll probably do it just enough for you to notice, but not so much that she can’t play it cool if you don’t take things further.

You’ll see her checking out your muscles, staring at your lips, and running her eyes up and down your body.

If you notice her doing this, you can try flirtatiously offering her to feel your muscles. If she’s interested in you, she’ll take this chance to build more physical intimacy with you.

She may even follow up with a flirtatious comment about what else you could do with those muscles — or you can try doing it yourself and seeing how she reacts.

11) She’s very passionate during kissing

If you’ve already gotten to the stage of kissing, this can tell you a lot about if she wants to take things further.

A woman who wants to sleep with you will put a lot of passion into the kiss. She may try to bite or lick your lips, or use her tongue a lot.

It goes without saying that French kissing alone is not consent to have sex.

But it does show you that she’s trying to rev up the sexual tension, and make you want her more.

Try suggesting you continue at your place, or take things to the bedroom. If she agrees, you both probably have the same thing in mind!

12) She’s permissive to your advances

A woman may give you many indications that she wants to sleep with you, but she won’t want to be the only one.

Many women like to be feminine, and they want to feel that way with a man. They like to be chased, and feel like you’re the one pursuing them.

So if she has sex on her mind, she’ll definitely be watching out for any signs that you’re making a move. She’ll take these opportunities to encourage you, in a sensual and feminine way, to keep going.

Some women will try to play a little game of “hard to get” to keep up some tension. If things are too quick and easy, where’s the fun in that?

But never assume that her rejecting an advance is just “part of the fun”. Even if she wants to sleep with you, there may still be things she’s not open to doing, and everyone needs to respect that.

If you’re not sure, a very easy way to check is to ask!

13) She tries to impress you

A good sign that she wants to sleep with you is that she tries to impress you.

What she wants is to take things to the bedroom. But she still wants to feel like a prize. She wants you to want her, and she wants to feel like you’re putting in effort to win her over.

A way that she might do this is by trying to wow you with her skills, achievements, or abilities.

She might tell you all about her accomplishments at work. Or she could brag about how far she’s come in her personal hobbies. Maybe you’ll find out about a hidden talent of hers — and even get a little demonstration.

Whatever the case, it’s clear she wants you to notice her and think highly of her.

While this doesn’t indicate clear sexual advances, it’s a good sign that she wants to fascinate you and captivate your interest.

Try showing you’re impressed and see where things can go from there. But also see if she reciprocates and shows fascination with you too. Otherwise, she may just be leading you on and playing with you for fun.

14) She compliments your body

Apart from checking you out, another sign that she wants to sleep with you is giving you compliments on your body.

She might ask you if you go to the gym, or say that she can already tell that you do. She might tease you by asking how much you can lift, and if you might be able to lift her as well.

By doing this, she’s clearly telling you that she noticed how great your body looks — and she wants you to know it.

She might also bring this up outside of the gym context. You might be telling her about having to lift heavy boxes at work, and she might reply by saying it must be easy for you with those big muscles you have.

A woman who’s set on doing this will find a way to sneak it into almost any conversation — but you can try to bring up going to the gym yourself and see if she takes the bait. You can also give her some compliments back to keep the ball rolling.

15) She tells you she wants to sleep with you

You can look for dozens of signs that she wants to sleep with you. But at the end of the day, the only one that really matters is that she tells you that’s what she wants.

A woman might seem totally hot for you, but you should never assume that it’s a done deal — even with the signs mentioned above.

She one best indication that she wants to have sex with you is it she says so — while sober, of course.

If she doesn’t bring it up, you can feel free to do it yourself in a respectful way. You could make a playful comment of it so it doesn’t feel so awkward or direct — but remember that simply laughing or making a joke back doesn’t count as consent.

You could also wait a bit longer until the timing feels right. If you’re both having fun flirting with each other, what’s the rush?

Final thoughts

There you have it — 15 signs that she can’t wait to sleep with you. As you look out for them, remember that everyone is unique and certain jokes or behaviors may mean very different things to different women.

Her signs might be different, especially if she is nervous around you.

Take your time to get to know her better until you determine whether or not you’re on the same page. And don’t forget to keep one thing in mind:

Intimacy isn’t just about what happens under the covers.

In fact, emotional connection is just as significant and can often indicate a desire for a deeper relationship.

If you’re finding it challenging to navigate these complexities, consider taking a deeper dive into the subject with the Love and Intimacy Masterclass by Rudá Iandé.

It could very well revolutionize your approach to love and intimacy.

Check out the Love and Intimacy Masterclass here.

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Picture of Lachlan Brown

Lachlan Brown

I’m Lachlan Brown, the editor of Ideapod and founder of Hack Spirit. I love writing practical articles that help others live a mindful and better life. I have a graduate degree in Psychology and I’ve spent the last 6 years reading and studying all I can about human psychology and practical ways to hack our mindsets. If you to want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Twitter or Facebook.

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