Keeping the spark going in a new relationship can be challenging. There will be ups and downs throughout the dating process, but what if you want to take things to the next level with your boyfriend?
How can you tell if he’s considering moving beyond casual dating and into something more serious?
There are many signs that a guy is ready for commitment. Here are 21 surprising signs that he’s prepared to give you the commitment you want.
1) He becomes protective of you
Think back to the time you first started dating. If he had dated a few girls before, he was probably quite casual about it.
That’s because a guy doesn’t want to waste his time or energy on someone who might not stick around.
But over time, he will likely begin to put his wants and needs ahead of yours. He’ll become protective of you and begin to expect peace and quiet around you at all times.
It gets better. The more he cares for you, the more he’ll want to see you happy. The things that annoyed him at the beginning of your relationship will begin to bother him less and less.
2) He introduces you to his friends and family
Another sign he’s prepared to commit is when he starts introducing you to his friends and family. This little step shows he’s proud of your relationship and is ready for the next phase.
You might be surprised by the reaction. His friends may get excited and want to know more about you, and his family will likely be welcoming as well.
But the key is to remain calm and respectful throughout this process. If he’s truly a committed guy, he wants you to feel comfortable around his family and friends.
Want to know the best part?
Not only do you get to witness the beginning of his life with his family, but you also get to meet the people who mean the most to him. This can lead to stronger feelings for him since you’ll know how much his friends and family support the relationship.
3) He continues to have great manners and etiquette
Great manners go a long way in any relationship.
There’s a reason couples who are deeply in love always say the secret to their success is treating each other the way they want to be treated.
If he is on his best behavior, it can be another sign that he is beginning to fall deeper in love with you. It may become more challenging for him to be on his best behavior, but he’ll likely do it anyways.
This is especially true if he had issues with being polite or having good manners before.
It’s also a sign that he cares about how you feel and wants to make sure you enjoy your time together. Even if he says or does something that bothers you, he’ll do his best to fix the situation.
4) He brings out his inner hero
Every man wants to protect the woman he loves. It’s instinctual, and if you are lucky enough to find a man who treats you well and is willing to commit, there is something else you will notice.
There’s actually a psychological term for what I’m talking about here. It’s called the ‘hero instinct’.
This concept is generating a lot of buzz at the moment as a way to explain what really drives men in relationships.
I know it might all seem kind of silly. In this day and age, women don’t need someone to rescue them. They don’t need a ‘hero’ in their lives.
But this misses the point about what the hero instinct is all about.
The hero instinct is an instinctive need that men have to step up to the plate for the woman in their lives. This is deeply rooted in male biology.
When a man genuinely feels like your everyday hero, he’ll become more loving, attentive, and committed to being in a long-term relationship with you.
But how do you trigger this instinct in him?
The trick is to make him feel like a hero in an authentic way. And there are things you can say and messages you can send to trigger this natural biological instinct.
If you want some help doing this, check out James Bauer’s excellent free video here.
I don’t often recommend videos or buy into popular new concepts in psychology, but the hero instinct is one of the most fascinating concepts I’ve come across.
5) He’s more attentive to your needs
When he’s ready to commit, he’ll begin including you in more of his activities. If he had been a ‘one-timer’ before, he will likely become more involved in your everyday life.
He’ll start to look for ways to spend time with you. He may make plans with you or do things that are subtle ways of expressing his feelings for you without coming right out and saying it.
Here are some subtle ways that he’s more attentive to your needs:
– He doesn’t get mad when you cancel plans
– He starts making more plans with your friends and family
– He brings you flowers or a card on a special occasion like valentine’s or anniversary.
– He includes you in family events or parties
– He makes sure to include you in special moments with his friends and family.
– He does things to make you feel special like bringing you flowers, buying you a gift, or spending time with you.
– He joins in on fun activities that used to be his alone time: road trips, concerts, hiking, etc. This can be something he used to do by himself.
You might notice that in everything he does, he always asks you first. That’s how he ensures it’s something you want him to do.
6) He becomes more aware of your habits
Think about this for a moment:
You love taking long, relaxing bubble baths in the evening after work or reading books before you go to sleep.
You might even keep a small ‘to-do list’ in your bathroom so you don’t forget your daily routine in between loads of laundry, dishes, and making dinner.
And you have been doing this for years, and there is no reason to change it because you are comfortable in your own space. After all, it helps kick off your busy day and get ready for bedtime.
But here’s the kicker:
Your partner has started noticing your habits too.
He realizes that you have a particular routine before you go to bed, and he’s now careful not to disturb it. He knows what time you get ready for bed, and he tries his best to leave you alone during that time so you can process everything from the day.
If this is the case, he’s making an effort to be on your mind without doing anything overt.
7) He’s more romantic — and maybe even a little cheesy
Not every guy is a hopeless romantic.
But if you notice his behavior becoming more sensitive and romantic, it could be another sign that he will eventually commit.
He might even tell you as much, but the difference here is that he’ll spend more time thinking about the ways to show it. He’ll take into consideration what you like and how he can best express himself through his actions.
If you had thought he was not sentimental or romantic before, this will come as a pleasant surprise to you.
8) He does something small but thoughtful for you without being asked
Those small cute gestures are some of the most romantic things he can do.
He might bring you flowers on your lunch break or a small gift from a store that you frequent. He might bake you a small treat to enjoy before bed, or he could make you a cup of coffee or tea in the morning.
These are things that he does just because…just for doing it because he knows it will make your day better.
9) He asks for your help in improving himself
Here’s the truth:
Every man wants to be the best version of himself that he can possibly be. And if he is ready to commit, he will likely start looking for ways you can help him do this.
He’ll want to be the best husband and father that he can possibly be, and this could include asking for your professional advice or input into his life.
For example, he might ask you to help him talk to one of his co-workers, or he might ask your opinion on a new business idea.
He’s not just asking for what you think, but he’s also trying to get your encouragement and support as well.
He not only wants you to love him today…but he wants to be the kind of person that can earn your love for years to come.
10) He’s always around when you need him
This is another one of those signs that he’s ready to commit.
There’s no doubt that he loves spending time with his friends, but he’ll become more attentive to your needs as well.
He may become more thoughtful about making plans with your friends or family. He might pick up those calls of yours, or he may double-check the details before leaving for a night out with the guys.
Sometimes, commitment can feel like a burden when you have someone in your life who’s always around for you. Take all of that pressure off and just enjoy the fact that he is always available to you…and vice versa!
11) He’s honest about his feelings
Honesty is a key quality in all relationships, but it becomes especially important when you’re looking to commit.
And it might be one of the best indicators of whether he is ready to commit or not.
Who’s going to be the most honest about their feelings? Would you rather have someone who can’t stop talking about how wonderful they feel or how hopelessly in love they are or someone who is silent until he’s ready?
Of course, there are different levels of honesty.
If he’s not ready to commit yet, it may be best for him to be just a little bit more reserved about the relationship. Telling a person that you like them can be moving too quickly, leaving the other person to feel uncomfortable with how things went.
But if he’s ready to commit, he will likely become more honest with you about how he feels. For example, he might say something like, “I’ve never felt this way about a girl before.” Or he may say, “I’ve never felt this way about anyone before.”
You can make him more ready for commitment by triggering his inner hero.
This relates back to what I mentioned earlier: the hero instinct.
When a man is made to feel needed, wanted, and respected, he’s more likely to commit.
And it’s as simple as knowing the right things to say to trigger his hero instinct and make him into the man he’s always wanted to be.
All of that and more is revealed in this excellent free video by James Bauer. It’s absolutely worth checking out if you’re ready to take things to the next level with your man.
12) He speaks respectfully about his ex(es)
OK, I know what you’re thinking:
How is this a sign that he’s ready to commit?
Remember, you want a guy who can discuss his previous relationships openly with you. If your conversation about his relationship history is negative or derogatory, it shows that he has some issues to deal with.
If he’s willing to talk about his ex(es) in a respectful and neutral way, it shows that he has nothing to hide from you and that he is ready to move on from his past relationships.
13) He’s ultra-supportive of your dreams and goals
Trust me, it’s hard being with someone who doesn’t think you are capable of achieving your goals.
If he comes from an environment where he was supportive of his girlfriends and wives, it will be easier for him to support you as well.
And that can make all the difference in the world.
He wants to ensure that your dreams come true, and he is willing to do whatever it takes to help you get there (within reason, of course).
14) He has a serious conversation with you
You two may talk every day, but it’s only natural to assume that the conversation is going to be light and casual.
But if he has a serious conversation with you, it might simply be because he wants to make sure that you know that he values your opinion and wants your input on issues. It might also be because he just wants to make sure that you are okay.
This also shows that he’s a responsible, mature person who knows when to pull back and has the ability to talk about things in a serious manner.
15) He exhibits jealousy when you talk about other men
Of course, it’s important to be loyal and supportive of your significant other.
But it’s also important to be able to show jealousy when someone does something with or for someone else.
If he shows absolutely no jealousy whatsoever over the fact that you are talking to other people, that’s one of the biggest red flags in the world. That means he doesn’t feel threatened in any way and that he doesn’t care about you as a person.
If he’s confident enough to show jealousy, then that means he wants you to himself and he understands that you are not going to give yourself up to any other man.
16) He exhibits trust and vulnerability by telling you his secrets
Another way to tell he’s ready to commit is to see how he acts when he tells you his deepest, darkest secrets.
Let me explain:
Men tend to keep their secrets close to their chest, thinking that no one will understand them. And they assume that they are the only person who will understand them.
It’s not really his fault, though. After all, he’s been conditioned by society to believe that he has to be secretive about his issues…so he believes that no one cares about him.
Then, when he gets into a relationship where he assumes that he can share that part of himself, he often ends up disappointed.
But if you see him talking about his issues, telling you his deepest secrets, then that’s one of the best signs that he’s ready to commit. It means he trusts you enough to know that you would actually understand and care about his issues during a time of need.
If he doesn’t talk about any personal issues with you, though, just be patient. He may still need some time to grow and become secure enough to share his secret with you.
17) He stops meeting with his friends as much
His friends were his first priority, right?
When you start dating someone, you always have to wonder what he’s going to do when you come into the picture. Will he stop hanging out with his friends? Will he no longer do things that they enjoy together?
If he’s ready to commit, then making time for you should be more important than being with his friends. And if you really don’t like competing for his time, now is your time to speak up and let him know!
18) He’s more affectionate with you in front of others
The truth is men don’t get a lot of affection. And when they do, they are often afraid to display it in public.
If he works up the courage to be affectionate with you in front of other people, then that’s a sign that he’s ready to put his heart out there and make you one of his most important priorities.
Remember that men are always worried about being a disappointment to someone, especially in public. So unless he’s a complete jerk and doesn’t care to keep his actions in check, he will likely be more affectionate with you when you’re alone than when you’re around others.
If he exhibits affection toward you in front of other people, then it’s safe to say you’re his most important priority.
19) He brings up the idea of living together
This is a big one.
Not every guy wants to live with his girlfriend. Some guys think that it’s a sign of quickly committing too soon. Other guys feel as though it’s a waste of money and other resources to commit to someone by moving in together.
If you are at a point in your relationship where you’re ready to live with each other and he’s just not into the idea, then that’s never going to work out.
If he brings up the concept, though, then it shows that he’s thinking about it and that he has already made the decision.
And now it’s your turn.
He’s giving you the opportunity to voice your opinion and make a decision for yourself. Again, if you don’t want to live together, now’s the time to speak up!
20) He becomes more respectful of your time
Even though being in a relationship means having your significant other in your life, it doesn’t mean that you get to monopolize his time or always see him.
So what does this mean?
If he exhibits symptoms of being respectful of your time, then that means that he sees you as more important than his own friends and family.
And when a man sees you as “more important” than his own family, that’s a good sign that he wants to be with you and holds you in high regard.
Men who value their time don’t have time to waste on people they don’t respect or love.
21) His friends have noticed a change in his behavior too
Maybe you haven’t quite figured it out yet. Maybe you aren’t sure if he’s ready to commit or not.
If you’re still questioning whether or not he is ready, though, then maybe it’s time for you to ask for some help.
Ask his friends or family members how he’s been acting and how he’s changed since you’ve started dating him.
For example, if he seems more affectionate and he’s always making time for you, then that’s a good sign. Plus, when you hear his friends tell you about how he’s changed for the better since he started dating you, it will definitely be a huge confidence boost.
We’ve covered 21 signs that he’s ready to commit to you. Keep in mind that being ready to commit doesn’t necessarily mean that he’s going to put a ring on it.
So be patient and let him know you care.
One of the best things you can turn your relationship into a lasting one is by bringing out his hero instinct.
Well, I mentioned the unique concept of the hero instinct earlier. It’s revolutionized the way I understand how men work in relationships.
You see, when you trigger a man’s hero instinct, all those emotional walls come down. He feels better in himself and he’ll naturally begin to associate those good feelings with you.
And it’s all down to knowing how to trigger these innate drivers that motivate men to love, commit, and protect.
So if you’re ready to take your relationship to that level, be sure to check out James Bauer’s incredible advice.