15 subtle signs he is developing feelings for you (complete list)

When I was dating my ex, I didn’t really have any idea of the signs that he was developing feelings for me. 

I’d only find out when he would mention something and it would hit me all at once that he had been feeling this way for a while, but hadn’t told me. 

But now when we are not together anymore, I can see the signs clearer than ever before! 

Either way, it’s over. I realized it too late. Besides, other problems made it impossible for both of us to go back to where we left it.

So this article is to collect those signs – 15 subtle signs your guy is developing feelings for you, so you don’t miss them and feel regret like I did.

1) He’ll encourage you when you’re upset about something

If he’s just not that interested in you, he’s not going to get concerned or worried if you have a bad day or are feeling upset about something. 

But if he’s developing feelings for you, he’ll do whatever he can to help.

Why do I say that? 

When I was dating this guy, he would always try to cheer me up and get me to stop being sad whenever I told him about it. 

He’d say things like “Oh, I’m sure you’ll feel better soon!  I’ll help you find a solution to your problems, so don’t worry. Everything will be okay.”

Or, “Hey… are you still mad about what happened yesterday? 

I’m sorry. I can be a little dense sometimes.”

He wasn’t like that with his other friends or anyone else in his life! It was only when it came to me that he’d get so concerned

So I knew right away that this was a sign of him developing feelings for me!

2) He’ll hold your hand and possibly touch your leg

I also learned this one from my ex!

He would often hold my hand during intimate situations. 

And if we were having a conversation, he’d occasionally brush his hand against my leg. 

One time we were talking in bed and I noticed he was close to doing it. I don’t know why, but at that point, I just knew something was up between us and it turned out to be exactly right! 

If he’s just not that interested in you, he’s not going to be comfortable holding your hand or putting his arm around you. 

He won’t touch you gently and be all sweet!

But if he’s developing feelings for you, he’ll get used to physical contact with you and come to enjoy it. 

3) He showers you with compliments

Some men just don’t come right out and ask you out if they like you.

They’ll often start off by complimenting a little, then work their way up to more meaningful compliments. 

But if your man is developing feelings for you, he’ll probably be the one to compliment you first! 

“You look amazing today!” he’d say with a smile on his face after noticing something about you that caught his eye. 

Or maybe he’ll ask you about your day, then tell you how glad he is that everything went well.

If your man is a little bashful (like mine was), he might still wait for you to say something nice first before showering you with compliments. 

But if he’s developing feelings for you, he’ll probably be the one to make the first move.

4) He’ll talk about his past relationships, but only with you

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If your man is developing feelings for you, he’ll feel like he can tell you anything.

And that includes his past relationships! 

He’ll tell you about his exes, and how things went for him with them. 

Maybe he’ll tell you a story about how his ex seemed to like him, then broke up with him. Or perhaps he’ll share an embarrassing secret from one of his prior relationships.

He’ll be comfortable enough to talk to you about anything because he’s getting close enough to you that you’re becoming a big part of his life!

5) He’d get more protective of you

Here’s something that happened with my ex that I thought was hilarious at the time: 

He told me one day, “If you go to the bathroom alone, I’ll follow you in there and make sure everything is okay. 

I just want to make sure you’re safe.” 

And for a while there, he did exactly that! 

Once when we were at a bar, he followed me into the bathroom and stood outside the door until I came out. Then he kind of laughed about it because it was so silly.

But I knew right away that it was a sign of him developing feelings for me! 

6) He’ll start asking for your opinion on things

When I was in a relationship with my ex, he would ask me for advice about different subjects all the time. 

I have no idea why he didn’t just go to one of his guy friends… but he asked me instead

Sometimes when we’d be talking about something for a while, I’d notice that he was getting self-conscious about not knowing the answer. So I’d bring up an example from my own life that had happened to me and we’d discuss it. 

But then I noticed that his questions got more personal. He’d start asking me questions like “What do you think of this situation with my friend? 

I feel like he needs my help, but I’m not quite sure what to do/ And “How would you handle this if it were you? I’m so confused about how to act. I’ve never been in a situation like this before…” 

Obviously, he thought that my opinions were valuable and important to listen to. There clearly were developing feelings for me! 

7) He invites you to participate in activities with his friends

If your man is just not that interested in you, he might not want to hang out with you if his friends want to spend some time with him. 

He might even be the one to suggest ending the night early so he can hang out with his friends. 

But if he’s developing feelings for you, he’ll be more than happy to include you! 

He’d encourage his other friends to spend some time with you, and it wouldn’t matter which of them wanted to go out. 

When I was with my ex, he would ask me to go with him to every event that his friends invited. He wasn’t shy to introduce me as his girlfriend. We’d all go together and have a good time! 

I’ve also noticed that a lot of guys don’t take their girlfriends with them when they hang out together. I supposed it was the guy’s things. But my ex did. This was definitely the sign that he thought I was a part of his life. 

8) He’d reveal hidden talents or interests he had

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If your man is just not that interested in you, he probably won’t want to share his hobbies with you. 

He’ll usually keep those things to himself, like his cooking or guitar playing. It’s probably not that important to him if you know about them anyway.

But if he’s developing feelings for you, he’ll tell you about his hobbies! 

Sometimes it seems strange that a man would be so open with you about these things (and I was sometimes the same way!), but I think it’s because most men wouldn’t be comfortable doing it. 

When they think that you are the special one, they would show you everything that they can do so you would admire them and take the relationship more seriously.

9) He changes his appearance

This one is easy to spot if you pay attention.

Does he try new clothes? Does his hair look different? Is he wearing any cologne? He might even start dressing a little nicer than usual when hanging out with you. 

If he’s just not that into you, he might even have bad breath and be wearing mismatched clothing! 

But if he’s developing feelings for you, he’ll make a bigger effort to look nice when around you. 

He might even dress up and comb his hair before coming over to hang out with you, or start shaving on a more consistent basis! 

He doesn’t care about what other people are saying about him. 

It’s just because he wants to look good every time he goes out with you. He doesn’t want you to keep your eyes on anyone else.

10) He finds out what kind of music you like and adds it to his playlist

If your man is just not that interested in you, he probably won’t think much about what kind of music you like. 

Maybe he’ll ask you to play some of the songs you like on your phone and see if he likes them. 

But if he’s developing feelings for you, he’ll think to himself, “If she likes these songs, I should listen to them too.” 

He’ll start adding them to his playlist! 

11) He shows up at places where you’re likely to be

And if he does happen to be at the same place as you, he tries to make sure that you see each other and are introduced. 

That’s a pretty good sign of him developing feelings for you! 

He might show up at a bar where he knows you like to hang out or at a beach where he knows that’s your favorite spot. He doesn’t have to try so hard if there aren’t any budding feelings between the two of you!

But if there are, then he’ll go out of his way to try and get an introduction. 

12) He’ll send you messages at weird times

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Another sign that he’s getting more feeling about you is that he’ll send you messages at weird times

If something happens to him during the day, he’ll be tempted to send you a quick message about it! 

Maybe it’s 3 am and he sends you a text saying, “Hey… I know it’s late but I was listening to this and it made me think of you”

Maybe he’s at work and can’t stop thinking about you!

Or maybe he’s about to go to bed, but he wants to know if you had a nice time at the party. 

He might send you messages like this from time to time when he thinks about you or misses you. 

Just pay attention to the times that your man sends messages and try to figure out why.

And if that kind of thing comes up often, it can be a sign that your man is developing feelings for you!

13) He’ll never tell you when he’s upset

One more common sign that your man is developing feelings for you is that he’ll always be all smiles. 

If he’s upset about something, he won’t tell you about it. 

If you ask him why, he’ll say “Oh, I’m fine!” and pretend like nothing happened. Because he doesn’t want his problem to bother you.

The only thing that he might say is: “I think I’m falling for you!” or “I miss you” – something like that! 

I’m not joking. That’s what my ex did! I was touched. 

There are all sorts of dramatic events that could lead to a guy opening up like this, but one of the best situations would be if he’s drunk or he was in a period of loneliness. 

I’m sure he was thinking about me then.

14) He’ll offer to do things for you

This is one of my favorites! 

If he’s just not that interested in you, he won’t try very hard to help you out or do things for you. 

But if he’s developing feelings for you, he’ll want to make sure that you’re happy and comfortable. And if that means doing things for you, then he’ll do it in a heartbeat.

One time I wanted to get a new haircut. 

I’d been waiting for my man’s permission before I asked him, but he didn’t offer any insight at all. 

That was strange because 

He quickly said, “Yeah, sure,” and agreed that it was something we could both do together.

While I got my hair done, he just sat next to me and asked if he could do anything. 

That was such a quick response from him! 

Is it because he was developing feelings for me? 


15) He’ll share his thoughts, feelings, and emotions with you

This is one of the most important signs that your man is developing feelings for you. 

He won’t come right out and tell you he loves you, but he’ll make it clear that he’s interested in you as a person. 

He might tell you about his day, ask about yours, or talk about what happened in the news. 

He’s trying to show that he cares about you as a person and wants to communicate with you. 

The only way to know for sure

It’s actually hard to know that your guy really has grown attached to you. 

He should make it clear to you that he’s developing feelings for you, but he might not put it in words. 

You can’t always expect him to be so direct (though I’ve learned that this is rarely the case).

So the only way you’ll know for sure is by having a good relationship and communication with him! 

If he does one of the signs I mentioned above, or always looks at you so dearly while talking, then it’s a good chance that he’s developing feelings for you.

And if he already seems to care about you a lot, then it’s time to step up and make a move! You’ll have to take an interest in his life, too. 

Be supportive of him and show him that you care about him as a potential partner. 

Trust me! This is the first step to having any romantic relationship with your man! 


Those are just a few signs of him developing feelings for you that I’ve noticed! 

I hope this helped you learn what you should look for in your man’s behavior if he might be in the process of falling in love with you. 

If you follow my advice, then hopefully it will work out for the two of you! 

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Tina Fey

I've ridden the rails, gone off track and lost my train of thought. I'm writing for Ideapod to try and find it again. Hope you enjoy the journey with me.

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