7 phrases only confident introverts use, according to psychology

I’m an introvert and I absolutely love it.

There, I said it. While extroverts often have it much easier when it comes to navigating the social world, I personally wouldn’t trade being an introvert for anything.

It’s what makes me enjoy my own company, what propels me to self-reflect on a regular basis, and what grants me the space to explore my rich and expansive inner world.

It’s not always easy to have a strong sense of confidence as an introvert, however – especially if you need to ask for space or say “no” to an event because you want to lie in bed and read a book all evening.

Luckily, confidence is a skill that can be learned.

Are you ready to own your introverted nature and claim space for yourself?

Here are the 7 phrases confident introverts use.

1) “I already have plans, but thank you”

Did you know that when you decline an invitation to an event, you don’t actually have to explain why you’re not coming?

Yeah, I know! This idea rocked my world when I first heard about it, too.

As introverts, we’re so used to overexplaining ourselves or finding excuses that sound more “legit” than our genuine needs that it may seem strange to simply say, “I already have plans, but thank you.”

Once you try it, though, you’ll realize that plenty of people don’t actually require further explanation.

They’re so preoccupied with their own lives that a simple declination will do.

They don’t need to know you have a dentist’s appointment, are halfway through an exciting book, or are “busy” doing all kinds of things (and by “things”, I absolutely do mean cuddling your pet and watching TV).

A confident introvert knows they don’t owe anyone any explanation. We’re all adults, after all.

If you have plans and don’t feel like sharing any more information, it’s completely okay.

(And yes, spending the evening alone with a takeout pizza and a good book is a valid plan.)

2) “I need to take some space to recharge my batteries”

According to psychologists, the difference between introverts and extroverts isn’t that the first are shy and the latter outgoing.

It’s actually all about the way we gain our energy.

Psychologist Seth Meyers PhD explains:

“Introverts love and need a fair amount of alone time, while extroverts need a fair amount of time with others. Introverts recharge their psychological resources or proverbial batteries in their quiet time, while what feeds an extrovert and gives them energy is time spent actively engaging with others.”

The fact that you need a lot of time to yourself isn’t some personality quirk or a fault you should fix. It’s an inherent part of who you are and how you recharge your emotional energy.

Therefore, introverts who are confident in themselves aren’t afraid to state their needs. They know their experiences are valid.

If you’re on a holiday with friends and are getting overwhelmed or if you’ve been hanging out with someone all day and feel like you’re running on 10% of power, remember that it’s okay to take some space.

3) “Can we reschedule?”

Psychologists say that it’s very important for introverts to learn how to manage their time.

If we fill our week with too many social activities and too little alone time, for example, we may end up feeling too overwhelmed and won’t give our friends the energy they deserve.

If you have accidentally overfilled your schedule or if you really don’t feel like going out, remember that you can always ask to reschedule.

An important thing to keep in mind is that cancelling or rescheduling shouldn’t be a regular occurrence (hence why it’s so crucial to manage your time effectively).

One of my introverted friends used to reschedule our hangouts so often I ended up giving up on the friendship because I didn’t feel like my energy and time were respected – and I say that as someone who’s introverted myself.

“Can we reschedule?” is a legitimate question to ask. Just make sure you don’t ask it too often.

4) “I love going out alone”

introverts thrive in social situations 7 phrases only confident introverts use, according to psychology

I love taking myself out on solo dates.

I travel to see new cities, go on hikes, go read books in cafes, and even go to the cinema sometimes. It’s fun. I like to spend time with myself – since there’s no one to converse with, it’s easier for me to be present in the moment and take in the world around me.

Of course, not everyone gets that. When one of my extroverted friends heard that I’d gone to the cinema on my own, she threw up her arms, saying, “Oh, I could never!”

I shrugged my shoulders. “I love going out alone.”

“Well, it definitely takes a lot of confidence,” she said.

And she was right. It is quite a confident thing to do – it means you are so very comfortable in your own company that you don’t get bored when it’s just you and no one else.

5) “I like myself”

One of the reasons confident introverts adore solitude so much is that they are inherently at peace with who they are.

And that isn’t something to be taken for granted. It’s actually quite rare.

When you genuinely like yourself, it means you’ve done a lot of work to embrace your imperfections, accept your feelings, and cultivate a state of mind that doesn’t feel like a prison.

It means your head is a pleasant and fascinating place to be.

No wonder you like to spend time alone! It’s like hanging out with one of your best friends.

Elizabeth Wagele explains it perfectly when she writes:

“We introverts make good friends for ourselves. Reasons I like being an introvert include: having a relatively relaxed pace so I don’t burn out, an inner strength I can count on, being curious so I’m never bored, and being internally stimulated-I always have something to think about.

“I’m happy playing the piano, drawing, writing, reading, gardening, learning, and investigating to find out what this wonderful life is all about. I find many other activities enjoyable, too, but I don’t have to be entertained or with people to feel alive.”

6) “I have a small circle of friends and that’s all I need”

Introverts tend to focus on a few strong friendships instead of building a large social network.

This makes perfect sense when you think about it.

We value quality above quantity; we prefer to have a deep and meaningful conversation rather than graze the surface of who other people are; we can be quite withdrawn or shy if we struggle to come out of our shells.

And you know what?

This is one of my favorite parts of being an introvert. I went through a really rough patch a while ago and I don’t know what I would have done if my closest friends weren’t there for me.

I can count my friendships on one hand, but they are so valuable and consistent that they provide what dozens of acquaintances couldn’t.

If you’re in the same boat and aren’t afraid to express your feelings about it – as in, you’re perfectly happy having a few friends who mean the world to you – it’s a sign you’re part of the confident introverts’ club.

7) “I need a bit of space to process how I feel”

Many highly sensitive people (that is, people who have increased emotional sensitivity and react more strongly to external stimuli such as sound or light) apparently identify as introverts.

This means that plenty of introverts need alone time not only to recharge their social batteries but also to take a break from the busy emotional atmosphere of the world outside.

We tend to soak in other people’s emotions without realizing it. Soon, we feel overwhelmed and need to take some space so that we can separate our own feelings from those of others.

This is why “I need a bit of space to process how I feel” is a completely valid phrase used by many confident introverts.

We often need some time to untangle the emotional mess inside and gain clarity, especially if we’re going through some sort of conflict. Alone time helps us reflect and calm down.

And that’s us!

If there’s one thing I want you to take away from this article, it’s this: you should never feel like you have to apologize for being an introvert.

Your needs are absolutely reasonable. Your introverted nature is valid. You matter. We all do.

Picture of Ava Sinclair

Ava Sinclair

Ava Sinclair is a former competitive athlete who transitioned into the world of wellness and mindfulness. Her journey through the highs and lows of competitive sports has given her a unique perspective on resilience and mental toughness. Ava’s writing reflects her belief in the power of small, daily habits to create lasting change.

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