10 personality traits that predict you’ll be a better partner than 95% of people

I’ve always believed that a strong relationship isn’t just a matter of finding the right partner. The more important goal, for me, is to be one. 

It’s about looking inward and asking ourselves how we can be better, more understanding, and more supportive in our relationships. 

Which then begs the question – what does it really take to stand out as a partner? 

I’m talking about going beyond the bare minimum. About making your partner feel like your presence in their life means they were born under a lucky star.  

Well, the answer is – it takes a set of certain personality traits. And that’s what we’re talking about today. 

If you see these 10 personality traits in yourself, there’s a good chance that you’re in the top 5% of people who know just how to love someone well. 

Let’s dive in! 

1) Self-awareness

Self-awareness is one of those traits that we all think we have, but the numbers prove otherwise. 

There’s an interesting study I read that investigated how many of us actually have self-awareness. 

What the researchers found is that 95% of people think they’re self-aware, but only 10-15% actually met the criteria to be considered truly so. 

That’s a huge disparity, don’t you agree?

The study was in aid of organizational psychology, but I think it holds a lot of relevance for relationships as well.

It’s because of this one crucial truth: 

A self-aware partner is capable of personal growth. They are capable of knowing what they need from their partner, as well as what they need to improve in themselves.  

And because of this, they’re also more likely to be…

2) Excellent communicator

Relationship experts are unanimous in saying that communication is a cornerstone in any healthy relationship. 

Before I got married, I had a number of relationships that broke down due to a lack of communication. 

Looking back, it’s clear that many of our issues stemmed from misunderstandings and assumptions that could have been easily avoided with more open and honest conversations. 

I can’t wash my hands of it, though; I was far from being a good partner myself back then. 

Instead of sharing how I truly felt or listening to my partner’s side, I often resorted to either being overly confrontational or to giving them the silent treatment. 

Thankfully, I did eventually learn how to communicate properly. With my husband, we make sure to do these communication practices to keep our relationship strong: 

  • Truly listening to what the other person is saying
  • Expressing our needs and feelings respectfully 
  • Not engaging in mind games and assumptions
  • Checking in with each other throughout the day to stay connected

If you do these practices yourself, you’re probably a great partner!

3) Empathy

This is closely connected to my previous point, as empathy is one of the main requirements for excellent communication.

The best relationships are those where both partners feel seen and heard. And that’s only possible if there’s empathy. 

It’s what helps us hear them when they’re airing their grievances instead of jumping into defensive mode. 

It’s what helps us make them feel safe enough to be vulnerable without the fear of being judged. 

Believe me, finding a safe space in a partner isn’t as common as you think. So if your partner sees you as theirs, that speaks well of your relationship skills. 

4) Patience

phrases feel insecure in the relationship 1 10 personality traits that predict you’ll be a better partner than 95% of people

Let’s face it – relationships can be a real test of patience. Especially when you’re more self-aware than your partner. 

You see, we all grow at different paces. And for some, it can be excruciatingly slow! 

Meanwhile, you’re already miles ahead and because you love this person, you’ve got to wait for them to catch up. 

You might have to explain things or try to get your partner to see things more deeply. And you might have to do it over and over. 

Trust me, this can get really frustrating. I’ve been guilty of finally breaking down and yelling at an ex of mine, “I’m so tired of being your emotional tutor!”

So yeah, patience is indeed a virtue. And it isn’t important just for the big stuff; it’s crucial for the small stuff, too. 

Because while you do love your partner, they probably have little quirks or habits that can annoy the hell out of you. Patience is what will stop you during those moments when you want to wring their neck. 

5) Sense of humor 

Similarly, a sense of humor will help you deal with frustration better than most. 

One of the best relationship tips I’ve ever heard is this – “Marry someone you can laugh with.” 

True enough, my husband and I have relied on humor to carry us through a lot. Life is already serious enough; if you take everything too seriously, you could either die early of a heart attack or walk around like a human Eeyore. 

Ask any older couple you see what the secret to a lasting marriage is, and chances are, humor is going to figure in it somehow. 

6) Flexibility

Being flexible is another trait that gives you an edge when it comes to being a better partner

It’s very rare for a couple to be in sync all the time. No matter how compatible you are, there’s bound to be moments that call for compromise. 

And if you’re the rigid type who can’t bear to give way, there’ll be a lot more friction than there ought to be. 

In an article on compromise in Very Well Mind, license marriage and family therapist Claudia de Llano says: 

”Compromise entails a mutual respect and regard for each other’s feelings and needs. It requires both partners to cooperate with each other and make adjustments to accommodate each other.”

Read that again: Adjust. Accommodate. Those are words a fantastic partner knows very well. 

7) Integrity

The world is full of liars and cheaters. I know that sounds harsh and cynical, but it’s just the truth. 

So if you have integrity? Man, you’re an awesome catch. 

It means your partner will never have to worry about you deceiving them. They know you have a strong moral code that requires you to be 100% honest not just with them, but with everything else. 

Integrity is also a trait that makes you dependable. When you say you’ll do something, your partner can trust that you’ll follow through. 

Of course, that doesn’t mean you’re perfect and you’ll get it right every time, but you will most certainly do your best. 

And that’s why you can have a relationship that’s built on trust and security. It’s also why you have this next trait…

8) Authenticity

Men who find it easy to commit in relationships 10 personality traits that predict you’ll be a better partner than 95% of people

If you have integrity, you just can’t help but be authentic. 

Why is authenticity so important in relationships? 

It’s about consistency. How you act and what you say is consistent with what you feel inside. There’s no gap to leap across, no mask to peel off. 

Your realness – as flawed as it may be – makes you a better partner than most people because: 

  • It’s easier to trust you. It’s easier to trust when you know that what you see is what you get. 
  • It allows you to be vulnerable. As Deepak Chopra once said, “Embracing vulnerability allows us to connect deeply with others.”

All of that adds up to more emotional intimacy. Not every relationship gets to enjoy that. I know couples who’ve been together a long time, but still struggle in this area. 

So if you can be emotionally available and intimate, you’re a cut above the rest! 

9) Independence

At the same time, you have a strong sense of self. As counterintuitive as that sounds, it actually makes you a better partner. 

Yes, being in a relationship involves compromise and a teamwork mindset. But that doesn’t mean you should gel together into one amorphous blob. 

In fact, studies show that  partners who maintain a sense of independence and develop their own potential have a higher sense of well-being and relationship satisfaction. 

Plus, being able to do your own thing outside the relationship means you also give your partner that same respect. You’ll be the cheerleader they need because you won’t feel threatened at all.

10) Generosity of spirit

Finally, are you a generous person? I’m talking here about generosity in all aspects – giving material gifts, time, affection, forgiveness and just being a kind person all around. 

Essentially, it’s a generosity of the heart and mind that enables you to share more of yourself with others. 

A research study by the University of Virginia’s National Marriage Project found that generosity is one of the top 3 predictors of a happy marriage. 

Consider these findings: 

Men and women with the highest scores on the generosity scale were far more likely to report that they were “very happy” in their marriages. This group comprised 50% of the participants. 

Meanwhile, among those with lower generosity scores, only about 14% claimed to be “very happy”. 

Clearly, the best partners are those from whom love flows freely with no strings attached. No manipulative intentions. No expectation of rewards. 

It’s really tough to be this kind of person, though. So if you are, then you’ll likely be a better partner than most, and your relationship is bound to be a happy one.

Final thoughts

So, do you recognize these traits in yourself? If yes, then give yourself a pat on the back! 

You’re a rare breed who knows just what it takes to make your partner feel loved without sacrificing your own happiness. 

If you find that some of these traits don’t come as naturally to you, though, don’t worry. 

The fact that you’re reading this means you’re already on the first step towards becoming a better partner – knowing what needs to change and what traits to cultivate. I have every confidence you’ll get there! 

Roselle Umlas

Roselle Umlas

I am a freelance writer with a lifelong interest in helping people become more reflective and self-aware so that they can communicate better and enjoy meaningful relationships.

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